


I'm a Ghost; You're an Angel

by Bulmaveg_Otaku



Category: Agents of S.H.I.E.L.D. (TV), Captain America (Movies), Marvel Cinematic Universe, Marvel's Avengers: Age of Ultron Prelude – This Scepter'd Isle (comic), The Avengers (Marvel Movies), Thor (Movies)
Genre: Agents of S.H.I.E.L.D. Spoilers, Angst, Avengers: Age of Ultron Compliant, CA:WS Compliant, Darcy has a potty mouth, F/M, Marvel's Avengers: Age of Ultron Prelude – This Scepter'd Isle (comic) - Freeform, Post Captain America: Civil War, Post-Avengers: Age of Ultron (Movie), Slow Burn
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2016-01-02
Updated: 2016-04-27
Packaged: 2018-05-11 01:07:23
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 36
Words: 72,457
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/5607984
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Bulmaveg_Otaku/pseuds/Bulmaveg_Otaku
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Based loosely on the movie Just like Heaven.</p>
<p>Steve brings Bucky in after the events of Civil War and put him in an apartment that supposed to be empty. Except the owner is still there, but the kicker is- Only Barnes can see her. Is he loosing his mind? Or is there some other reason for this pistol of a dame to be haunting him?</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Prologue

_December 12th, 2015_

The apartment lay mostly still, with the strains of a stilted ‘Silent Night’ drifting through the wall between Darcy’s place and the piano teacher Mr. Dobbins’ next door. His student was probably still a week or so away from their Christmas recital, and from what Darcy could hear, he or she would need a little more practice before then.

   
In contrast, Darcy herself was a flurry of motion as she moved from room to room, flipping pillows, opening drawers, and flopping down on the floor to eye under all the furniture, as she continued her desperate search.

  
“Keys, keys, keys,” she muttered under her breath as she looked under the couch cushions for what had to be the third time. “What did I do with them?” she hissed to herself as she pulled open all the kitchen cupboards and left them open, her eyes flying over them as she scowled with frustration.

  
Logically, she knew her keys wouldn’t be in her cupboards. Jane hadn’t been over since the last time she’d come home with them, and Darcy had never picked up that particular habit from her Astrophysicist boss/friend, but she was running out of logical places to look, and was determined to leave no rock unturned, so to speak.

  
Her phone buzzed in her pocket and the Dandy Warhols began singing, “I am a Scientist.”

  
“Think of the devil,” Darcy sighed and pulled her phone out of her purse to answer the call. “Jane, I’m trying to leave, I promise, but I can’t find my fucking keys.”

  
There was a pause and then, “They aren’t in your purse?” came from the speaker in Jane’s clear, smoky voice.

  
“Nope, that was the first place I looked.”

  
“Well, when did you last have them? Did you retrace your steps?” Jane prodded, her impatience peeking through, though Darcy still appreciated her attempt to hide it. Darcy was supposed to meet Jane in front of the Avengers tower five minutes ago, and she still had at least a half hour long cab ride from Forest Hills, and that’s if there wasn’t any traffic, which, yeah right.

  
Darcy rolled her eyes, momentarily despairing that Jane couldn’t see it, though she probably knew she was doing it anyway. “Of course, I did.” She sighed deeply and pinched the bridge of her nose as she walked over the front door.

  
“I came hope after work, unlocked my door with them, then entered…” she pantomimed the motions, holding keys, unlocking door, turning knob, and then stepped into the small living space that held her couch and television. “I took off my coat and laid it over the back of the couch, dropped my purse on the side table, like I always do, and then kicked off my shoes and chucked them down the hall at the bedroom door. They aren’t in my purse; they aren’t on the couch, under the couch, or under the side table. I even checked inside my shoes, but, no dice.”

  
“What about your coat pocket?” Jane asked, braced for another sarcastic retort. When she received none, she ventured a, “Darcy? You still there?”

  
Darcy picked her coat up off the back of the couch and reached into the first pocket. It was empty. She tried the second, but the extra weight on that side already hinted at what she’d find.

  
“Got them,” she said, trying to push through sheepish and go straight to triumphant. She failed.

  
“Jesus, Darcy, really?”

  
“Yeah, thanks Jane. I’m pretty sure I lifted my coat and looked under it at least a dozen times, but I didn’t think…” she let her words drop off as she swung the coat on and buttoned it up before sliding her purse on her left shoulder. “You’re a life saver, Jane. I’ll be there in… 50ish minutes?”

  
“Tell your cab driver there’s an extra fifty in it for him if he can get that down to 40,” Jane muttered. “I’ll tell Happy to have the doorman time him. I don’t think I can survive any longer than that without you, Darce.”

  
Darcy closed her door behind herself and turned to lock it with her newly found key ring, complete with Mjolnir key-chain. “Geez, Jane, you make it sound like you’re walking the plank, not attending a world famous Tony Stark Holiday Bash©. Just take it easy on the nog, try to avoid that douche bags Richards, or getting into any Science! debates with Stark or Selvig, and I’ll be there ASAP.”

  
“You better, Darce. See you soon?”

  
“Yep, later, bater,” Darcy chuckled and hung up as she made her way to the elevator. When she rounded the corner, she spotted two guys she didn’t recognize leaning against the wall outside 701. It wasn’t too far outside the stretch of possibility to think they were out of town relatives visiting for the holidays, but something about them sent the hind part of her lizard brain scrambling for shelter.

  
She straightened her back and walked a little taller, clutching her keys tightly in her fist and making sure to stick close to the far wall as she forced herself forward. ‘Don’t freak out, it’s probably nothing, don’t overreact,’ she chanted internally as she tried to find a compromise between avoiding all eye contact, and keeping alert and aware of the two strangers.

  
She passed without them saying or doing anything.

  
With a quiet sigh of relief she kept walking, her pulse gradually slowing as she stopped in front of the double metal doors and pushed the button for down.

  
‘No big deal,’ she thought, hiking her purse strap tighter to her shoulder, ‘nothing to freak out about, Darcy. It’s totally fi-‘

  
She barely registered the soft hiss of air behind her before everything went black.


	2. Bucky Moves In

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Bucky moves in and gets an unexpected guest, or is an unexpected guest. He's not quite sure.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This chapter's a bit longer. Self beta'd so... there are probably mistakes. Sorry! Let me know if you see anything glaring.

 

**6 Months Later**

 

“I know it’s not much, but-“ Steve’s voice trailed off as Bucky gave him a small frown and shake of his head as the Captain stepped over to the counter closest to the door and set the bags of groceries on it carefully.

“Its fine, Steve.” His voice was still low and rough, not quite used to being used frequently. “As long as you’re sure no one is going to come looking for me here.”

Steve tilted his head and gave a moderately reassuring shrug. “As sure as I can be. No one has used the place in months, and no one ever comes here. It might not be the very last place anyone would look for you, but it’s gotta be pretty far down on the list.”

Bucky dropped his black bag over the back of the couch to land on the overstuffed cushions.

“Plus, it’s furnished, at least,” Steve said, trying to force a smile as he waved at the bits and pieces that filled the space and made it look like it belonged to a person, like it was a home.

Bucky couldn’t remember the last time he’d stayed in such a place, though it definitely had that vacated feeling- a light layer of dust, a shadowy weight of things settling over a stretch of time. Those were things he was more familiar with.

Steve seemed to think his silence meant dissatisfaction and continued to stammer clumsily. “It’s only temporary, you know. We’ll get things figured out, and once all the legal stuff is settled then it’ll be safe for you to join me upstate.”

“I said its fine,” Bucky said again, just as quietly, as patiently. “It’s cozy.” He stepped over to a shelving unit that held several dozen paperbacks as well as some larger, text book sized hardbacks and some slimmer plastic cases that had titles in bold and powerful print lining the spines. He recalled they were a storage device for viewing movies. “And it looks like there will be plenty to do while I’m lying low,” he said with a rueful twitch of his lip that was only technically a smile.

“I’ll show you how to access Netflix before I go,” Steve offered as he walked around the couch to pick up a slim black remote from the coffee table situated between the couch and the television rising from a small stand against the far wall.

Bucky allowed Steve to help ‘get him settled’ as Steve put it and then Steve had to leave. He had a long drive back upstate and it’s already getting late. Once his well-meaning friend was gone, the assassin stood in the middle of the living room and let the silence settle over him.

It’s only silence in the strictest terms. The apartment walls are thin and muffled sounds still filter through from the other residences on the floor, as well as from the city outside the windows, but its close enough to give him a moment of peace.

He leaned his hip against the arm of the couch and let his eyes drift shut. He’d never really relax, not really, but he sighed in relief as he felt some of the tension in his back and shoulders lessen. His life had been utter chaos for the last few years, the last couple of months especially, and it was nice to be alone in a space that was warm and welcoming.  
He opened his eyes and turned slowly as he took in the rest of the space. There was a small kitchen off to one side, a counter between the two spaces that served as a dinning space with two bar stools tucked neatly up underneath them. The walls were adorned with posters for things that were unfamiliar to him, pictures of people he doesn’t recognize- some look to be movie posters, while others proclaim the names of individuals, or groups, probably musicians.

Along with the books and discs on the shelf this room is filled with things that someone once loved, things someone once cared about enough to spend money on and adorn their small space with. He spared a moment to consider the person or persons that used to live here, or still lived here; he’s not sure about the details. Steve had been very reluctant to give him details and Bucky could tell it was sort of a sore subject, so he didn’t push.

There aren’t any clues to the gender of the occupants (former occupants?), there are none of the frilly lace things or ribbons that he can vaguely recall his mother and sisters using to decorate their home, but he knows things have changed significantly since the 1920’s and 30’s, so that’s no real help. Somehow, the brightly colored pillows resting against corners of the couch don’t seem the kind of thing a guy would add to their decor, but again, times had changed.

His mind drifted back to his childhood home until his peaceful contemplation started to turn melancholy, then he roused himself. Moving in his effective, purposeful way, he gathered up his belongings and distributed them around the space. His few clothes went into the closet and dresser drawers, his weapons to various strategic locations in every room, and his meager toilet kit into the small bathroom. He also went into the kitchen and put away the few essential groceries Steve had helped him buy on the way over here. There were eggs, milk, butter, and bread, as well as some bananas and a bag of potatoes.

He searched the cupboards quickly and found them stocked with dishes, as well as basic baking goods with a whole shelf of herbs and spices. Bucky figured it would be a good idea to take an inventory of what he had and make a list of things he might need to get.

That done he walked back to the bedroom and sat on the end of the bed. The down comforter, with its green and blue streaked duvet bunched around his backside, letting him sink into the mattress in a way that was foreign and almost uncomfortably cozy. He shifted, trying to find a position that he could relax in, but it was hopeless.

He finally just stood, wrestling himself from the cushy clutches of the bed and stripped the whole mess of comforter and sheets off. Underneath the mattress pad he found an extra foam layer, 4 inches thick. He pulled that off, too, and shoved it over against the window. Underneath was a plain off-white mattress and box springs. He sat on the exposed bed and found it to be acceptably firm beneath him.

He rolled up the foam bad, tied it with a couple of strips of rope he had in his bag and shoved it into the back of the small closet. Bucky then remade the bed, leaving off the comforter, also folded up and placed in the closet, and added a few extra blankets from the linen closet in the hallway.

He didn’t like being cold when he was asleep. He didn’t like being cold, period. That done, he sat on the bed once again. It was a bit early for sleep, but there really wasn’t much else for him to do. Steve had showed him how to work the TV and its accompanying electronic devices, but somehow entertainment just held no appeal. He’d just about decided to get his sniper riffle out from under the bed to clean it and check the calibration on his scope when he heard it.

“Where the hell could you be hiding?”

The voice seemed to be coming from the front room, though he could have sworn he hadn’t heard the door open. He immediately pulled his phone out of his pocked and shot a quick text off to Steve before pulling a handgun from his bedside drawer and checking to make sure he still had enough knives on his person.

He stepped lightly to the bedroom door, which was open only a crack and checked his eye line down the hallway. With most of the lights off in the apartment, everything was shadows and dark corners. He debated turning off the bedside lamp, but remembered the distinct clicking noise the little pull cord had made when he turned it on and was afraid of drawing attention to his location.

Instead, he quickly tossed a blanket over the top and settled for the relative darkness that followed. Then he pushed the door open and ninja walked out into the hall. He could still hear the person, (female, highly agitated), muttering and moving about the front room. There was still no sign of who they were talking to, so he had no idea as to the number of intruders.

He reached the end of the hallway, his back close to the wall, and stealthily leaned around the corner to peer into the room. What he saw surprised him.

There was one girl, standing in the middle of the room, her hands on her hips as she scowled at the back of the couch. She was wearing a fitted red dress, matching lipstick and black heels. That wasn’t exactly optimal attire for breaking and entering.

“Where could they be?” she hissed and turned to scan the island counter between the main area and the kitchen. “Damn it, Jane is going to be so pissed,” she sighed and took a step towards the kitchen.

He followed behind her quickly scanning the entry way, which was empty, the space in front of the couch, (also empty), and into the kitchen where the girl now stood, looking around at the counters and cupboards frantically.

They were alone. There was no one else here. So what the hell was this girl doing here, Bucky wondered. Was she lost? Playing some kind of game?

Only one way to find out.

“Don’t fucking move,” he growled, his pistol raised and aimed at the back of her head. He had walked around the end of the counter and had his back to corner, just in case.  
The girl screamed, her body jerking at the sound of his voice as she spun around, very obviously not listening to his command. “What the hell!?” she shouted and back up to put her back to the refrigerator. “Who the hell are you? What do you want? I don’t have any money!” she shouted as she raised her hands.

“Shut up,” he hissed and turned to scan the rest of the apartment again. This girl and her non-threatening clueless act read like a diversion, a decoy, but he refused to be diverted. “How did you get in here?”

“How did I get in here? How did you get in here? This is my house!” She all but screamed at him, her hands sort of flailing around.

Bucky narrowed his eyes at her. “Don’t lie to me,” he snarled and took half a step towards her, pointing his gun at her menacingly.

She cringed back against the fridge and put her hands up again. “I’m not lying, this is my house, my apartment. I’ve lived here for, like, a year and a half, and, I mean, I’m gone with Jane a lot when she travels for her science stuff, but I still live here, I mean, all my stuff is here. See!” she insists pointing into the front room at the TV and bookshelves. “All that stuff? That’s my stuff! This is my stuff! Are you here to steal my stuff?”

It’s obvious that she is panicked and babbling, but it could be an act, so he doesn’t fall for her trying to divert his attention.

“Be quiet,” he insists and tries to think. He supposed it was possible that she was the owner of the apartment, and that she had simply returned and failed to inform Steve or any of his friends. He knew Steve was likely on his way here. They just had to wait. The Captain could sort it all out when he arrived.

Thankfully, it seemed she’d shut her mouth for the time being. She seemed to be studying him very closely now though. He’d removed his hooded sweatshirt after Steve left and his arm was on display beneath the sleeve of his t-shirt.

Something seemed to click in her head and she pointed at him with wide eyes. “You’re the guy!”

He raised an eyebrow at her, but refused to reply. Now that he had a plan to wait for Steve he thought it best not to engage the target.

“I’d recognize that arm anywhere. You’re Steve’s friend, right? Or you used to be. The one Captain America has been looking for,” she clarified, as if Bucky might not have figured out to whom she was referring. Which was him.

“Holy shit! So, what are you doing here? I mean, I’ve met the guy a few times, and I’ve seen him around the tower some, but I don’t really know him know him, you know? I could probably get a hold of him for you if you wanted me to. He’s supposed to be at Stark’s thing tonight, I think, so if you wanted to come with me…”

She waved towards the front door took a step forward. He clicked his tongue at her and stepped a bit to his right to block her path to the door and shook his head. He wasn’t going anywhere with this dame, and he certainly didn’t want to get anywhere near Tony Stark. Things were- well, tense was an apt word, with the Billionaire.

“Uh- okay,” she said as she stepped back again. “I guess that’s a no-go.” She crossed her arms and looked around. “Just as well. I can’t find my keys, anyway.” Her eyes went sort of glassy for a few seconds as if she was trying to remember something, but then she seemed to shake herself out of it and focused back onto him. “Did you steal them?”

He was so startled by her question that he couldn’t help but respond. “Steal what?”

“My apartment keys. I can’t find them, and if you managed to get in here, then it makes since that you might have taken them, although I could have sworn I had them when I got home…” her eyes went fuzzy again and she drifted off.

Just then, he was saved from this massively confusing conversation by the door bursting open and his big blond friend entered, shield raised.

“Holy shit balls!” the girl yelled and ducked down to hide behind the counter.

“Bucky!” Steve called as he looked around quickly. When his eyes fell on the man in question, Steve stepped quickly to his side, eyes sweeping the rest of the space for threats. “Where are the intruders?! Did you chase them off?” He kept the shield up as he searched the living room and kitchen quickly. “You didn’t kill them and hid them in the tub, did you?” His tone was light and teasing, but his eyes said he was more than a little afraid that had actually happened. “I’m sorry, Buck I could have sworn this place was safe.”

“This place was safe, until this crazy creeper showed up, Cap!” the girl exclaimed, straightening from her crouch. “Boy, am I glad you’re here,” she said with a sigh as she lowered her hands and stepped forward. “Would you tell your twitchy friend here that this is my apartment,” she insisted, then as an afterthought, “And ask him if he stole my keys. I’ve been looking everywhere for them.”

Bucky waited for his friend’s response, his gun still raised. Something was wrong, though. The entire time he’d been there, Steve hadn’t looked at or acknowledged the girl once. In fact, he had looked right through her.

The former assassin froze, confused and off balance and hating every second of it.

“What’s the situation, Bucky?” Steve asked, turning to him again. “Your text said ‘Location compromised, intruder alert.’”

Bucky nodded, then glanced towards the girl again.

She was frowning. “Intruder alert! That’s right, intruder alert! You’re scary friend here ninja’d his way into my apartment and held me at gunpoint. I’d appreciate it if you’d talk him down and, preferably, take him away. He’s freaking me out, and Jane took my Taser away.”

“Buck?” Steve asked, finally turning to look at his friend. “You in there? It’s me, Steve? Do you remember me?”

Glaring his best death glare, Bucky lowered his gun and turned to look at his friend. “Of course I remember you, punk. You only left twenty minute ago.”

“What the hell, Bucky?” Steve asked reaching for his pocket and pulling out his phone. “Was this some kind of test then? See how fast I could get back here? I was only half way across town, you know.”

Bucky shook his head and glanced once more at the fuming woman before holstering his weapon. “Sorry. False alarm. I heard voices, probably just next door, TV or something, probably. I just overreacted.” He added an apologetic cringe for his friends benefit. “Guess I’m still a little trigger happy. Won’t happen again.”

“What. The. Fuck.” The brunet in the dress said, her face a mixture of rage and confusion. “Is this some kind of twisted joke? Like, did Barton put you up to playing a sick prank on me? This is super messed up. I will be lodging a formal com-”

Steve interrupted her. “I’m just gonna look around, okay? Make sure?” He put a hand on Bucky’s shoulder as he lowered his shield and gave his friend a reassuring and understanding smile.

He nodded at Steve and watched as his friend gave the apartment a quick once over, heading back down the hall as the girl continued to sputter obscenities. It was actually quite impressive.

“You guys have to be the biggest donkey-fucking tools I’ve ever met! What the fucking, god damned hell did I ever do to you! I’ve never even met you!” she said indignantly, pointing at Bucky. “And I certainly expected better from you, Captain Rogers. America’s hero, my ass! You’re nothing but an overrated, ridiculously proportioned frat boy! I mean, I knew that Barton was a grade A douche nozzle when it comes to playing practical jokes, but you guys have really taken the cake. Motherfucking, inappropriate dick bags, both of you!”

She stormed past Bucky, shouting after the Captain. “And I want my goddamned keys back! I don’t know how you got them, but this is so far outside the bounds of acceptable behavior! I’m gonna tell Jane! And Thor. No!” she said, suddenly stuck with inspiration. “I’m going to tell Pepper! You guys are really going to get it when I tell her what scum sucking cock-gobblers you and your friend have been, Rogers!”

Bucky would have laughed at her tirade if he wasn’t standing there with a knot in his gut and pressure building behind his eyes fit to launch a thousand migraines. “He can’t hear you, doll,” he finally sighed.

She wheeled on him. “What the fuck do you mean he can’t hear me? Rumor is, the guy is loaded with all the extra features, super senses and shit. He can hear me just fine. He’s just too busy being a total-”

She was cut off once more by the Captain, only this time it was because he walked right through her. Not around her, or past her. Through her. She gaped at his back as he stepped up to Bucky.

“What was that, Bucky?” he put his hands on his friend’s shoulders again, tilting his head to look him right in the eye.

“Nothin’, Steve. Just talk’n to myself,” Bucky admitted, eyeing his toes. He didn’t need Steve to know that he’d finally, totally cracked. He knew he was messed up in the head, but full on visual and auditory hallucinations were a very new, very terrifying level of crazy he just wasn’t ready to deal with yet. He certainly didn’t want to worry the punk any more than he already was, either.

“You sure you’re okay?” Steve asked, worry dressing every crease of his frown.

“Yeah, I’m fine.” He looked past Steve and noticed the dame was gone, vanished without a sound or sign.

He turned his eyes back to his friend. “Now, quit your bellyachin’ and scram, would ya? I need to shower and get some sleep.” He knew that talking like the old Bucky and announcing his intention to take care of himself would have the big lug off his back faster than any other words or reassurances would and he used that to his advantage.

“Sure, ya jerk,” Steve said and cuffed him lightly against the back of his head as he smiled. “Just don’t be calling me next time you’re spooked by some ghost,” he teased and walked over to the door to inspect the damage. Sobering quickly at the splintered frame, he turned back to look at Bucky sheepishly. “I’ll bring a new door over tomorrow and fix that.”

“All right. I’ll nail it shut after you go. Well, if I can find some nails,” he said, looking around.

“You do that. G’night, Bucky.”

“Night, Steve,” he replied with an easy wave and a faint smile that stayed on his lips till the door was closed. “Losing my fucking mind,” he muttered and walked back to the bedroom to look for something to keep the door closed.

It figured his mind would be feeling the strain after all these years, but this… This was something else. He had been thinking a lot about the apartment, wondering about its owner and what that person would be like. It sort of made sense that his delusion would latch onto that as a way to explain itself away.

And then there was the fact that his delusion also looked like every combination of daydream he’d ever had wrapped up in one gorgeous curvy package. He recalled her long fall of dark, wavy hair and big blue eyes, seeing them differently now that he knew she was really no threat. At least, not physically. And that mouth! Jesus, what a fucking pistol!

He groaned and let himself fall face first into the bed. He’d always imagined the things haunting him would be the stuff of nightmares, not fantasies. He supposed it could be worse. Right?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'll probably be updating this twice a week or so, at least until I've finished writing it, then we'll see.


	3. Darcy Channels Princess Leia and Shadow Cat

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Darcy's back. Again. And then again. And again.

Darcy stood in her front room, hands on her hips, as she looked around. She decided she was currently suffering the worst Boundary Effect event in recorded history.

  
“What the hell was I doing?” she muttered and lifted her thumb to stick it in her mouth and chew on her thumbnail. That always helped her think. She saw her perfectly polished nails as her hand neared her face. Then she noticed her nice dress and heels.

  
Oh, right, Stark’s Christmas thing. She was late, but she couldn’t find her keys.

  
“Where the hell could you be hiding?” she asked her keys as she looked around the spotless room.

  
That was when she heard the shower running. Her shower.

  
“The fuck?” she asked and walked over to peek through the bathroom door, which was cracked open a few inches. Sure enough, she could see the mirror, clouded with steam, and the curtain, shadows of water droplets coating the inside as a dark figured moved behind it.

  
Someone was in her shower!

  
If that wasn’t just the weirdest home invasion strategy ever…

  
Suddenly something in her brain just clicked and she remembered the two men that had been in her apartment. The guy with the gun and the metal arm, and Captain Rogers, who kept calling the other guy Bucky while he rudely refused to even look at her or acknowledge her presence at all.

  
She followed that train of thought right down the rabbit hole until she remembered the last thing that had happened before she… Before.

  
The Bucky guy had said Steve couldn’t hear her, and then Steve had walked right through her like she was some kind of ghost.

  
She felt panic rising in her throat.

  
Darcy was scared, and confused, and nothing was making since, and there was someone using her shower…!

  
Wait, was Captain America naked and wet in her bathroom?

  
Her growing hysteria jerked to a halt as she paused to consider that idea and the lovely mental image that came with it. Curiosity won out in the end and she decided to try and keep calm and work at figuring this whole mess out. And see who was in her shower.

  
She decided to take a page from Jane’s book of scientific methods and run a quick experiment. Putting out her hand, she tried to press it against the door and push the door open.

  
No dice. Her hand just disappeared right into the door.

  
She stuck her head through, and sure enough, there was her hand, sticking out the other side. She leaned back and reached down to straighten her dress. The tiny red belt around her middle and the cute little ruffled detail at her waist all shifted at her urging. She could fell herself, and affect her clothing, but not the door or other people.

  
She’d experiment more later, she decided, and stepped through the door into the bathroom. Behind the shower curtain, which was clear except for a large, colorful, two-dimensional design of the globe spread across it, she could see a dark, long haired figure as he scrubbed his hands over his face and rinsed soap from his stubble covered cheeks and chin.

  
Not Captain American then. Darcy was slightly disappointed; until she let her eyes wander a little more and discovered that this guy, his scary metal-armed friend, was apparently just as cut beneath his clothes as she imagined Cap to be.

  
“Nice,” she said appreciatively and watched as the guy tensed, though he didn’t whip around and point threateningly at her, as she’d thought he might. “I guess a free show is acceptable payment for you using my facilities. Without my permission,” she added with just a touch of venom.

  
“She’s not real,” the guy muttered and turned around to rinse his hair under the spray of water. “Just ignore her and maybe she’ll go away.”

  
“Ex-Cuse you?!” She said prickly as she crossed her arms over her chest. “I am too real! I’m real pissed off and upset and confused and I’d like to know just what the fuck is going on.”

  
He simply ignored her and finished rinsing off before shutting off the water.

  
She was just about to raise a little more hell and give this guy what for when he shoved the curtain to one side, the metal rings making a screeching, knocking shriek as the scrapped along the shower rod, and reached for a towel. Her words caught in her throat as she was suddenly getting an eyeful of toned, rock-solid man flesh, shiny with shower water that embodied just about every daydream fantasy she’d ever had.

  
Her eyes jerked up from where he was wrapping his towel to his face, which was watching her carefully with just the smallest hint of a smirk tugging at one corner of his mouth. He must have remembered he was trying to ignore her though, because his face slipped back into an emotionless mask and he turned his back to her as he wiped steam of the mirror and reached for a comb.

  
“I though all you blast from the past soldier boys were supposed to have manners and shit. I know Steve does. He even called me ma’am, the first time we met, and was very polite. Guess those Hydra guys must have removed those along with your arm, huh?” she said, knowing it was a perfectly shitty thing to say, but needing more than anything to get a reaction from him. She felt the panic creeping back up her throat and threatening to choke her. She just really needed to know she was real, that he could see her and hear her.

  
The way his back went tight at her words and his hands paused in their work of combing through his long, dripping locks made her think he could.

  
“I’m sorry, I shouldn’t have said that,” she added after the guilt started gnawing on her gut. “I think what happened to you is really, really awful and-“ she paused. “Just- I’m sorry, okay. Would you just turn around and talk to me, please? I’m really freaking out here.”

  
He glanced at her reflection briefly, meeting her eyes for only a second before he went back to finishing his hair. Once it was all slicked back and lying flat against his head and neck he set down the comb and reached for a shaving kit.

  
“Sorry, doll,” he said finally, just about the time her eyes were starting to fill with tears, “I just don’t think it’s a good idea for me to be encouraging my hallucinations. It’s probably bad for my mental health if I start treating you like you’re really here and chatting you up.”

  
“You think I’m some kind of h-hallucination?” she stuttered. She considered that for a minute and then blinked away her tears as she realized that with his history, that was probably the thing that made the most sense.

  
“Okay, look, I get it. If I started seeing and hearing somebody that no one else seemed to be able to see and hear, I’d probably just think I was going nuts, too, but you have to listen to me. I’m a real person. I’m not just some figment of your imagination. I don’t know what’s going on with me, but I do know that.”

  
She swallowed hard and searched his face in the mirror desperately as he continued ignoring her as he mixed his shaving cream and lathered up his face.

  
“Look, my name is Darcy Lewis. This is my apartment. I’ve lived here for about a year and a half, like I told you earlier. I’ve met your friend Steve Rogers. He used to hang out around the tower some before they finished that big old facility up state earlier this year. I used to work there in the labs with my boss.” She realized that reaching out to other people might be a good idea. “My boss, Jane Foster, is dating Thor. If you just call them, I’m sure they can straighten this out. There was probably an accident in the lab or something. Jane’s always working with portals to other dimensions and fiddling with the fabric of space and time. That’s probably it!” She felt relief and excitement at the prospect.

  
“If I had my phone I could just call her, or maybe you could call her,” she bit her lip as she patted down the front of her hips. No pockets meant no phone on her person. Which probably meant her fingers wouldn’t do jack shit on a touch screen anyway.

  
“I was going to meet her at this Christmas party at the tower,” she said in a rush and then looked around. What time was it? Was it even still the same day? She’d probably missed the party. “Holy shit, Jane must be freaking out. She’s gonna be so pissed at me!”

  
Darcy tried to think back, remember what happened. She’d come home from work, showered and gotten dressed for the party, then been looking for her keys…

  
Had she found her keys? She vaguely remembered talking to Jane on the phone and then… There was nothing. No blank spot, no black out, no nothing, she’d just been standing in her apartment looking for her keys and then she’d heard the shower running.

  
Only that couldn’t be right because she remembered Bucky coming in and pointing a gun at her and then Captain America busting open her door and everything after that, only-

  
Darcy looked around, only to realize that she was once again standing in her living room, wondering what she’d come in here for and feeling the worst sense of Deja Vecu.

  
Her head hurt and her memories were sort of fuzzy.

  
She’d been looking for her keys, right?

  
The strongest feeling that something else was missing, something not her keys, swarmed over her.

  
She turned a slow circle and noticed that her front door was now being held closed with several pieces of metal wedged between it and the door frame which was looking worse for the wear, splintered and broken, especially around the latch.

  
Captain America! She recalled everything as her memories swam back into focus. Bucky!

  
She’d been trying to remember what had happened, and now she was back, caught in some kind of weird memory loop. She had to find Bucky! She knew he could see and hear her. If she could just get him to help her.

  
He’d been in the bathroom shaving, right?

  
Darcy darted down the hall and turned into the first doorway on the left. Only it was dark, and empty, though there was a damp towel hanging on the towel rack, the one he’d been using, if she remembered correctly.

  
“Bucky!” she shouted. “Please still be here, please!” she whimpered as she turned to walk farther down the hall to the bedroom.

  
She walked right through the door and spotted him lying in bed, his flesh and blood arm tossed over his eyes and hiding most of his face, the sheets and a couple of her spare blankets pulled up over his chest.

  
“Oh, thank god,” she said sighed deeply, putting a hand over her heart. “For a second there I thought you had left me.”

  
“For a second there I thought you had left me,” he muttered, but she heard him all the same.

  
“Nope,” she announced, kind of proudly. “I’m still here. Still me. Look, dude, I really need your help here, okay. I know you don’t believe I’m real, but I am. I know telling you that I’m real isn’t really going to help my case, because that’s exactly what a hallucination would say, too. Probably. I don’t know, I’ve never met any hallucinations, but it sounds like something one would say. But I’m not one. I’m real.” She growled in frustration as he just lay there, not moving and not responding.

  
“How can I convince you if you won’t even talk to me?” she moaned and sat down at the bottom of the bed.

  
“You can’t. Just go away and leave me alone,” he said suggested, not very helpfully.

  
She sighed deeply. “I can’t do that. You’re the only one that I know can see and hear me. Plus, you’re in my apartment, dude. All I’m asking you to do is check a few facts, do a little research, and you’ll then you’ll see. Help me, Bucky-wan Kenobi. You’re my only hope!”

  
“What the hell does that mean?” he asked, lifting his arm to look down at her like she was the crazy one.

  
“What?” she asked back, defensively. “It’s Star Wars. Haven’t you seen Star Wars?”

  
“No,” he replied back, just as defensively. Then, remembering he was supposed to ignore her existence he turned on his side, away from her and pulled the blankets up to his ear. “Go away.” He said one last time.

  
“I’m not leaving till you help me, dude. You’re Captain America’s bestest friend, right? Aren’t you supposed to be some kind of hero?”

  
He snorted rudely and pulled her extra pillow up over his ear.

  
“Rude!” she said and then put her face in her hands.

  
“Fine, if you won’t help me, I’ll just have to help myself,” she stated decisively after a few minutes of wallowing in self-pity.

  
“Finally,” she heard from the pillow, though it was very muffled.

  
“Asshole,” she spit, cursing under her breath and then stood to march out of the room and down the hall.

  
She took a second to worry about the door and how to get it open before remembering she could totally just pull a Kitty Pryde and walk through it. Once in the hallway she turned and headed towards the elevator. It occurred to her that she was on the 7th floor and that she wasn’t just falling through the floors, which was curious, but she didn’t really have time to consider the reasons when she rounded the corner and caught sight of the elevator.

  
She stopped dead in her tracks then. Though the hallway lights were putting out their usual 60W glow, it seemed as though it had grown much darker. And colder, maybe. And Darcy was suddenly filled with an inexpiable sense of dread. Terror walked its nasty little claws right up her spine and she found herself-

  
Standing in the middle of her apartment with her hands on her hips, wondering where her keys had gotten off to.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Figure this is as good a place as any to explain a couple things.   
> This is all possibly cannon. For now. Since the majority of it is set post-Civil War, it's just waiting to be totally jossed, but I'm hoping to have it completely posted before then. For sure. So, that said, I have left the events of the movie fairly vague and based this on a few general assumptions about what I think might happen.  
> These are just guesses, so I'm not tagging them as spoilers, but take them for what you will.  
> 1\. The movie with end with Tony and Steve coming to some kind of truce in order to save the day, and the world, and so on.  
> 2\. Whatever trouble Steve has with the government/authorities will be wiped out by him doing the heroic thing to save the day- mostly. He's still working it out, but public opinion on Captain America is good and matters enough to get him pardoned.   
> 3\. The whole mess with Bucky will be in sort of limbo until Steve can get things sorted out legally. He's hiding Bucky away because he still doesn't trust the government, which is why he doesn't even consider having Bucky turn himself in.  
> 4\. Tony is still fairly pissed about Bucky having killed his parents.  
> 5\. The bad guys (Hydra again) will be defeated and no one will die
> 
> Uh... that's it for now. More to follow as necessary.


	4. Bucky Receives TMI

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Battle of wills. Who will triumph? Who will surrender? More language and some sexual discussion.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hey, real quick I just want to thank everyone that's been reading, leaving kudos, and commenting. You guys are the best! This story is almost completely written, so updates should stay pretty regular. Enjoy!

“Fuck the Fucking keys!”

  
The voice jerked Bucky out of the doze he’d been trying to maintain long enough to get his body to actually fall asleep. Apparently, his delusion had other ideas.

  
He kept the pillow over the side of his face and tried to ignore her, it- whatever, harder.

  
When she spoke again, this time right next to his pillow smothered head, it is only his years of intense training and dedication to self-mastery that keep him from jumping and screaming like a little girl.

  
“Hey, Bucky!”

  
He groaned and pressed the pillow tighter.

  
“I know you can hear me,” the girl sounded mildly pissed off. “Apparently, whatever hoodoo voodoo has me all incorporeal is making me too terrified of the elevator to make my escape. So, you are stuck with me, I’m afraid.”

  
“Take the stairs,” he growls and hears her laugh.

  
“I would, Buckaroo, but they're next to the elevator and that whole stretch of hallway seems to be a no fly zone. Every time I try, it freaks me out and I get zapped right back to start of this whole stupid loop thing. It’s quite frustrating,” she said in the most understated way possible. “I feel like its Groundhog’s Day, only in reverse. Instead of everything else staying the same, I’m the one who’s stuck.”

  
“What’s February 2nd got to do with you bothering the shit out of me?” Bucky asked, feeling once again like she was speaking a foreign language at him. Except it was English she was speaking. It was just gibberish. Of course his delusions would be totally mad as well.

  
“’Cause of the movie. With Bill Murray? What the fuck, dude? Do you even own a television?” she was looking at him as if he was the completely unreasonable one in the room.  
He growled and pulled the pillow back over his face, sorry that he’d engaged with her. It! Damn it.

  
“I’m not going anywhere. Even if I do disappear on you, I’ll just come right back. I can’t leave, so you might as well just agree to help me now so that you can avoid all this unpleasantness of trying to ignore me and me trying to get your attention by any means necessary.” The woman’s voice was very penetrating, though a bit muffled. Which seemed weird to him, now that he thought about it. If she was all inside his head…

  
“Don’t say I didn’t warn you, dude.” Pause. “Okay, you asked for it.” Pause. Then she began singing, if you could call it that. It was more like, shouting at the top of her lungs out of key.

  
“99 bottles of beer on the wall, 99 bottles of beer! Take one down, pass it around! 98 bottles of beer on the wall!”

  
It was pretty much downhill from there. Apparently, his mental illness had decided he didn’t need any sleep. It really needn’t have bothered. He already had enough trouble sleeping.

  
After all 99 verses of beer on the wall she started yammering away, talking about any little thing that popped into her head. First, it was all about her favorite things: favorite color, favorite food, favorite kind of shoe, and so on and so forth. She told him all about what she liked and why she preferred each thing over all of the other options.  
Then she started talking about her family. Her rather large, extended family: Her mom, her dad, her step mom and step dad, her 3 siblings, 2 half siblings, and her step- brother, her grandparents, both sides, aunts, uncles, cousins, who had made it home for Thanksgiving and on and on.

  
All of that lead to her basically giving him the rundown of her entire life story which included all the places she’d lived, the friends that she’d had at school and which concerts she attended.

  
Finally, the thing that broke the Winter Soldier’s iron will, she began discussing her sexual history and listing all the pro’s and con’s about each person and the kind of relationship she’d had with each partner.

  
“Sixth was Jared, he of the very average-sized penis. We never actually dated. He was my roommate’s brother, back when I was at Culver, you remember I told you about Ella. Well, he came to stay with Ella over spring break and we got drunk a couple of nights and messed around. The first time I actually thought he might puke on me while we were making out, which was so not flattering, but it was because he was so totally wasted. I sent him to bed after that, which was pretty responsible of drunk me, if I do say so myself. The next morning, though, he crawled in bed with me and just slid right in. I was still fairly wet from the night before, and I guess by then he was sober enough to find his way around. It was pretty underwhelming though. I was basically asleep and it didn’t really seem worth waking up for, so… Yeah. The second night was a little better. We weren’t quite as drunk and we actually had some decent foreplay, you know, without anyone almost vomiting, though he still didn’t manage get me off. Selfish fucker.”

  
“Then there was-“

  
“Okay!” He shouted, sitting up and glaring at her. “I’ll do whatever you want, if you’ll just SHUT. THE FUCK. UP! And let me get some sleep.”

  
She grinned at him then nodded before lifting her hand and zipping up her lips.

  
He rolled his eyes and lay back down. By the time he was done fluffing his pillow and pulling up the blankets, she had disappeared again.

  
Bucky smiled into the silent darkness and slept. He even managed to get 3 straight hours of sleep. Which he considered a big win.

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry it's kinda short. More on Friday!


	5. Darcy Talks Things Over With Bucky

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Darcy gets to watch Bucky have breakfast and they talk things out, and their planning maybe gets interrupted.

The next time Darcy faded into being, there was light shining in through her apartment windows. It helped her focus and remember what was going on even more quickly than before.

  
Noise from the kitchen had her moving for the small space, searching for the cause. Bucky stood at the stove, spatula in hand as he stirred a pan full of scrambled eggs over the stove.

  
She watched him silently for a moment. He was in a tank top and athletic pants and his hair was up in a messy bun on the top of his head. Darcy enjoyed a moment of seeing his arms move, both the right one with its bunching muscles and smooth, lightly tanned skin, and the left one with its shifting plates and quietly whirring gears.

  
He twisted the nob on the back of the stove and reached for a plate sitting next to him on the counter to dump his breakfast onto just as the toaster popped.

  
Darcy leaned against the counter and cleared her throat.

  
Bucky’s body tensed as he turned sharply to look at her, but he didn’t spill his eggs, so that was something.

  
She gave him a great big grin and waved. “Good morning! How’d you sleep?”

  
He snorted and turned to pull his toast out of the toaster and butter it. “Better after you finally vamoosed,” he said with a bitter twist to his mouth.

  
“Hey, I warned you, man. I wanted to do things the easy way, but you insisted on the hard way,” she explained, her hands raised in defense. “If you hadn’t been so rude and totally ignored me for hours, you could have gotten to sleep much sooner.”

  
Bucky smiled ruefully and shook his head. “Maybe, maybe not. I don’t always have an easy time drifting off.” He dropped his buttered toast onto his plate and walked around to pull out a stool and sit at the counter to eat.

  
Darcy squished her face up thoughtfully as she looked him over again, this time seeing the smudge of dark circles under his eyes, and the tension in his brow and mouth. “Yeah, I guess going through- what you when through would make it kinda hard to relax.”

  
He glanced up at her sympathetic tone and frowned at her, considering her as he popped a fork full of eggs into his mouth.

  
She squirmed a bit under his scrutiny and then stood up straight, needing to change the subject and break the awkward tension badly. “So, I’ve been thinking.”

  
He raised an eyebrow and looked back at his plate, chewing away.

  
“I mean, I’ve been totally focused on my half of this little problem, I never really stopped to consider your side of the story.”

  
He grunted humorlessly and took a bite of his toast. He wasn’t looking at her anymore, but she got the impression that it was more because he was focused on his meal, rather than because he was ignoring her again. Which was fine. She didn’t really want to be the focus of that penetrating stare any longer than she had to be anyway.

  
“So, correct me if I’m wrong, but I figure that what happened was Captain Rogers finally found you, or you found him- anyway, you found each other after he’s been searching for you for like a year or so and since I..” she faltered and looked around her apartment again, brow furrowed, “…since I’ve been gone, he decided to let you stay here. I wonder what he thinks happened to me. I mean, does Jane know? Did she tell everyone the truth or did she make up some cover story while she tries to find a way to bring me back? I have so many questions. This is why I had to make with the audio torture last night, dude. I need answers, and you’re my only way to get them.”

  
Bucky swallowed and glanced up at her. “I have to admit, I have one hell of an imagination. My subconscious must be working in overdrive. You’re actually a very convincing hallucination, you know? What that says about my psyche, I don’t want to even guess.”

  
Darcy scowled at him. “You’re still on that!?” She slapped her hand down on the counter. “I AM A REAL PERSON, ASSHOLE! I am not some figment of your twisted imagination.”

  
He stared carefully at her hand. “I thought you were trying to see things from my side,” he reminded her with an expectant tilt to his head once he was looking up at her again.

  
“Oh, right. My bad. How inconsiderate of me to get upset about being called a liar and a delusion over and over, despite all my efforts to prove otherwise. You think I told you my life history, complete with sexual conquests for kicks? I was trying to make you see that I am not just a dream or something. I have a life, a family, people who have probably started to miss me by now. You think your subconscious could have come up with all of that detail? All those facts?”

  
Bucky shrugged. “The mind can be a powerful thing.”

  
She groaned and put her hands over her face. “Okay, okay, fine,” she sighed eventually. “Let’s just say, for arguments sake that I’m right. I’m real and not just a hallucination you’re having. You want me to go away and leave you alone, right?” She watched him nod, “Well, the only way that is going to happen is if you help me. Probably. Besides, you sort of already agreed to do it, right? You aren’t gonna back out now, are you?”

  
Bucky sighed as he chewed and swallowed another bite. “No, I’ll help you. I just want you to consider this though, for arguments sake. If you aren’t real, if I’m just having some kind of breakdown, and I start asking around, letting people know that I’m seeing and hearing this mouthy, obnoxious dame, that that isn’t going to go over well. I’m guessing you missed everything that happened over the last month or so. I’m not exactly everyone’s favorite person right now. Steve managed to pull off some kind of miraculous truce for the moment while he gets everything figured out, but the world already sees me as this ticking time bomb, if not an outright unbalanced menace. If I start going on about hearing voices and seeing things no one else can, they’re gonna lock me away for good and throw away the key. And, yeah, maybe this does mean I’m having some kind of mental break, but I’m hoping that you’re just some kind of coping mechanism while my brain is- I don’t know, resetting itself or something, coming to terms or whatever- and I figure as long as you aren’t telling me to start killing everyone that I can get some help, you know, talk to someone or get on some medication or something, and then you’ll just go away naturally.”

  
Bucky looked ready to punch something, he was so tense, and his voice had risen steadily as he talked on and on about his fears. Darcy sort of felt bad for the guy, and she couldn’t help the twinge of guilt eating away at her gut.

  
Bucky looked down and noticed that he’d bent his fork in half and sighed, trying to relax. He reached over with his metal hand and straightened it back out and then went back to eating.

  
“Look,” Darcy started, voice lighter than before. “I’m really sorry. I don’t want any of that to happen to you either. I get it; you’re not really in a good place right now. I don’t know why the universe decided that you’re the one that gets to see me when no one else can. It’s not like I picked you, or anything, but you don’t have to worry about any of that happening. ‘Cause I am real, and you aren’t crazy. Or at least you’re not hallucinating me. And I most certainly am not going to begin telling you to kill everyone. If anything, I’m going to insist that you don’t kill anyone around me. That shit would freak me out.”

  
He shot her a kind of strained smile. “Guess maybe that means you’re my conscience or something?”

  
She rolled her eyes, but couldn’t help smiling back. “Sure, just call me Jiminy Cricket.”

  
His eyes lit up. “Hey, I’ve actually seen that movie.”

  
She giggled and shook her head. “Well, at least that’s one point for you, grandpa.”

  
Bucky mock scowled at her and went back to his food. “Who’d have thought my conscience would be such a mouthy little shit. You kinda remind me of Steve- you know, from before. If he were a spiffy, brunette dame instead of scrawny, blond punk,” he added with his mouth full of eggs.

  
“Uh, thanks?” she said, trying not to blush and probably failing. “And don’t talk with your mouth full. It’s gross.”

  
He winked mischievously and swallowed. “You got it, doll.”

  
She rolled her eyes at him again and pushed away from the counter. Pushed right off of it with her hands.

  
Darcy did a double take and stared at her hands and then the counter. “Did you see that?” She reached out with one hand, but this time, her fingers passed right through it. “Shit, I know I was touching it just a second ago.”

  
Bucky shrugged. “Probably ‘cause you weren’t paying any attention. It probably has more to do with your expectation.”

  
She tilted her head at him and gave him a considering look. “So I expected to be able to lean on the counter because I’ve always been able to lean on the counter before, but now that I’m aware of it and thinking about how I’m not supposed to be able to touch things, I can’t?”

  
“Something like, yeah,” Bucky said as he finished his food and stood to walk his dishes around to rinse them in the sink. Steve had shown him the dishwasher, so he opened it and placed his plate and fork into the racks before scrubbing the spatula and skillet he’d used to cook and adding them in as well.

  
“Guess that’s probably why I haven’t gone falling through the floor either. The power of suggestion is too strong.” She paused, really noticing what he was doing. “No, the non-stick pans with the Teflon have to be all hand washed,” she said, looking over his shoulder. “If you ruin my cookware with your technological inexperience, I’m gonna be pissed.”

  
Bucky frowned. Had Steve told him that? He didn’t think so, but he might have heard it elsewhere.

  
“Fine,” he muttered and pulled the pan out, putting the stopper in the sink and running the hot water. “Where’s your dish soap?”

  
“Under the sink,” she answered promptly and smugly.

  
He looked and it was, but since that was the logical place for it, the first place he would have looked on his own anyway, he didn’t think much of it.

  
While Bucky was focused on that, Darcy turned back to look at the stool he’d left out from the counter. She approached it carefully and studied it.

  
She’d sat on that stool a hundred times. It wasn’t a big deal. She could totally do this. She turned her back and sat down. Right through the stool onto the floor. The sight of the legs rising up out of stomach made her feel a bit queasy.

  
Darcy rolled away quickly and then hopped up. “Damn it,” she cursed and reached out to swipe her fingers through the seat. “Just grab it!” she urged under her breath. She sighed in frustration and looked up to find Bucky watching her with a sad look on his face and his arms crossed over his chest.

  
“Ain’t nothin’ doin’, sweetheart,” he drawled in his deepest Brooklyn accent and tried to give her a smile. “Whadya say we get to work on figuring this thing out. What do you want me to do? You’re a real girl? Fine, convince me.”

  
She knew he was probably just trying to distract her from her disappointment, but since that meant he’d accepted her as a thinking, feeling being, at least on some level, she decided to call it a win. Besides, the sooner he called Jane and got this straightened out and her back in corporeal land, the better.

  
“Okay, so first thing first, I think we should call my boss. Jane will know what happened and she’ll be able to tell you the truth, that I’m Darcy Lewis and that I’m me.”

  
Bucky frowned. “I don’t think I’m comfortable calling up some random woman I’ve never met and asking her about her potentially real, missing friend. That’s the quickest way to get the cops called, or the men in the white coats to come and take me away.”

  
Darcy frowned. He did sort of have a point. If a world renowned assassin started calling someone with facts about a missing girl, their first thought is going to be that he’s the one that took her/killed her, not that he was seeing her invisible spirit. And she didn’t know for 100 percent that Jane would have an idea about what happened. She was sort of assuming it was a lab accident or that if something happened to her, that Jane would have some idea as to what or why.

  
“Okay, I guess we’ll have to be a little bit sneaky about it, then. Steve didn’t tell you anything about me when he brought to you stay at Casa de Lewis?”

  
Bucky shook his head. “He sort of very pointedly ignored the topic. Seemed a touchy subject, so I didn’t wanna ask.”

  
“Maybe you should, though?” she suggested and started pacing as she spoke. “If Steve is your best source for information, you should ask him first. That way you can find out what they know and you can always play it off as idle curiosity.”

  
“I guess I could try, but the punk is no dummy. He’s gonna be suspicious if I start showing interest in something like that.”

  
Darcy bit her lip and looked around as she paced. “Maybe there’s something here?” That was when she started noticing all the little differences she’d glossed over before. All her pictures where gone off the walls and her bookcase. Her books and movies and TV were still here, as well as her posters, but what about her Christmas decorations. What about her tree?

  
She glanced around again to make sure she hadn’t missed anything. “Where’s my Christmas tree, anyway? Did you take it down?”

  
Bucky shook his head and stepped into the living room to stand next to her. “Christmas tree? No, that must have been long gone when I got here. I mean, it is June.”

  
Darcy turned to gape at him “JUNE?!” Her mind started spinning, panic and confusion threatening to overwhelm her. “What year is it?” she whispered and reached out to grab his arm, only to have it pass right through him. “Shit,” she cursed.

  
“2016,” he said quickly, holding his hands up like he wanted to touch her but knew he couldn’t. “It’s June 4th, 2016, Darcy. When were you- uh, what’s the last thing you remember?”

  
“Getting ready for Stark’s Christmas party. December 12th, 2015. It’s been six months? I’ve missed six months!? What the fuck!”

  
“Hey, calm down, its okay,” Bucky insisted, but he was looking at her strangely, panic sliding across his features. “Darcy?!”

  
But Darcy was gone.

  
Bucky stood alone in the room and sighed heavily.

  
“I never signed up for this shit,” he muttered and then went to the bathroom to brush his teeth and get ready for the day. The panic on the girl’s face as she’d started to flicker in and out of existence, or maybe fade in and out was more apt, hit him hard. However one described it, the whole show was spooky as hell.


	6. Bucky Snoops

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Left on his own, Bucky takes a look around.

Bucky spent a couple hours looking around the apartment, going through Darcy’s cupboards and books, looking through her dresser, and going through her closet. It was there that he found the shoe box. It was tucked back behind the rolled up foam pad he’d stuffed in there the day before and hidden in the dark, recessed corner.

  
He pulled it out and opened it gingerly after setting it on the bed next to him. Inside were various odds and ends, mostly little pieces of paper, like movie tickets or squares of cardboard that held wedding announcements or party invitations. There were also a few Christmas cards tossed in with the rest.

  
They were all addressed to Darcy Lewis.

  
Had he seen this during his search the night before? Is that where her he’d gotten the name? He was pretty sure he hadn’t. His head was starting to ache again with all the questions.

  
Then, towards the bottom he found a medium sized envelope, bright orange and blue with the words Kodak across the front. He pulled it open gingerly and pulled the stack of pictures from behind the sleeves of tissue paper.

  
Some of the pictures were of picturesque scenery, red rock formations in interesting shapes or desertscapes with sunsets of bright pink and gold in the background. There were also some of the night sky, clear and dark with shadowy horizons framed against the bright smattering of the starlight scene.

  
On one picture towards the center of the stack, he found the image of a small, thin woman, sitting on some kind of lawn chair, a thick quilt pulled up around her shoulders and a mug in her hands as she tried to wave away the person behind the camera. She was pretty, with long brown hair and big brown eyes. She was lovely, but she wasn’t his girl-uh, his hallucination.

  
Disappointment surged through him for a second. He’d actually started to want to believe she was telling the truth. More the fool him, and he almost tucked the photos away and gave up, but here were only a handful more in the bunch, so he figured he might as well finish looking through them.

  
The third to last picture caused his heart to start pounding and his breath to catch in his chest.

  
In this one, next to the same girl from the other picture, there was another brunette. This one had blue eyes and a wide cheesy smile with a small gap between her two front teeth. She was wearing thick, dark framed glasses and a knitted cap pulled down over her head. Bucky would know that smile anywhere.

  
“Holy shit,” he whispered and lifted the picture for a better look as he set the rest back in the box on top of the envelope.

  
This wasn’t absolutely definitive, he tried to tell himself. It was always possible he’d seen the girl before, his memory still had quite a few holes, after all. Perhaps he had known about her enough to be aware of her address and personal information. She was associated with the Avengers, and it wasn’t beyond the realm of possibility that his subconscious had merely connected those dots and manifested the girl from there.

  
Possible, but not probable, he thought, shaking his head as he was nearly overwhelmed with questions and doubts.

  
If he had to guess, he figured this was what going mad really felt like.

  
He shoved the picture back in the box, shoved it onto the floor and lay back on the bed to think.

  
A half hour later, Bucky called Steve.

  
“Hey, punk,” he greeted his friend.

  
“Bucky,” Steve said back, sounding glad to hear from him. “How was your night? Did you get any sleep?”

  
“Some,” Bucky admitted. “It’s rough sometimes, you know.”

  
“Yeah, I do. Just give it time, okay? Things will get better.” Steve was just as concerned and supportive as ever.

  
“Yeah, yeah, I will. So what are you doing today?” He asked, stalling. He was still looking for a way to casually bring up Darcy without sounding like a lunatic.

  
“I’ve got a meeting with a bunch of lawyers in a bit. I’m actually headed into the city for that now. I could come over afterwards. It’ll probably take a while, but I could bring over some pizzas and we could have a late lunch?”

  
“Sure, that sounds good.”

  
“Okay, I’m having a new door delivered, too. I’ll help you fix it up when I get there.” Steve said and Bucky could hear the smile in his voice. “See you in a few hours.”

  
“See you,” Bucky said and hung up. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry it's another short one, guys. I'm getting pretty close to finishing though and once I'm done writing the whole thing I'll start posting more often, promise. 
> 
> Thanks again to all the comments and kudos! You guys rock so hard!


	7. Darcy Gets Pushy

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Steve returns! Also, Darcy might be getting a little impatient with her situation... But can you really blame her?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Two Chapters today, Everyone! this is for 3 reasons.
> 
> 1\. These two chapters just belong together. It felt too cruel to keep them apart.  
> 2\. I wanted to celebrate reaching over 50,000 words on this story this week. I'm at a critical point. It won't be long now!  
> 3\. To say thank you to all of you that have been reading and showing your appreciation for this story. I've been blown away by the response and wanted to say thanks!

The next time Darcy became aware of herself, she was once again standing in her living room, no surprise there, but she remembered everything from her last few visits almost immediately. It helped that Captain Rogers and Bucky were sitting right in front of her on her couch, talking and drinking beers and sharing a pizza.

  
She walked slowly around the end of the couch, catching Bucky’s eye and giving him a little wave, before moving around to stand on the far side of the coffee table, her back to the TV.

  
Bucky gave the smallest nod and then went back to listening to Steve explain about some meeting he’d had earlier.

  
“Most of them think we’ve a pretty great case, Buck. Everyone’s really optimistic about getting most, if not all of the charges against you dropped. Some of them think that it would be better if you turned yourself in and let the authorities keep an eye on you while they put your case together, but I explained to them why that wasn’t a possibility. I mean, we know there are still corrupt government officials out there, and having you in one place, locked down under the public eye is just too much risk. Too many people still want to see you dead and buried.”

  
“Can’t really blame them,” Bucky muttered and sipped his beer. “But yeah, I’m better here. This place is as safe as any and there’s a lot to keep me occupied.”

  
Darcy smiled at that and bit her lip to keep from saying she’d keep him plenty occupied. Even in her head it sounded dirty and she didn’t want to distract Bucky while he talked with Steve, who still obviously couldn’t see her.

  
“Sure. You’ve got 70 years of media and history to catch up on, just like I did,” Steve said, nudging his shoulder playfully and looking at the bookshelf.

  
“Not so much history,” Bucky admitted. “Hydra kept me up on the more important parts, giving me bits and pieces every time they thawed me out. Sure, it’s all from a fairly skewed prospective, but most of that kind of information managed to survive the memory wipes…” His voice trailed off as he watched Steve’s face fall.

  
He tried again. “But movies and music, yeah, I mean, they didn’t exactly give me free time for that kind of thing so…”

  
“Wow, Bucky,” Darcy said, one hand on her hip, “You better just stop talking now. You made Steve look like someone kicked his puppy.” Bucky shot her a quick glare, but she just shrugged unapologetically. “What? It’s true.”

  
Steve had tipped back his head and drained his beer. Neither of them could get drunk, but it felt familiar and helped things between them seem more normal.

  
“Another beer?” Bucky asked and made motions to stand.

  
“No, I gotta take off soon. Still have to be back upstate tonight. The president is sending someone in to help negotiate terms for the military in the morning so I need to be on my game. I’m just gonna hit the head before I take off,” he said and took off down the hall before Bucky could say another word.

  
“Did you ask him about me, yet?” Darcy asked immediately, whispering, though she knew Steve couldn’t hear her.

  
Bucky shook his head. “Haven’t had the chance,” he admitted sheepishly. “It’s not like I can just say, ‘Hey, Stevie, you know that girl Darcy that used to live here? What ever happened to her, anyway? She’s sort of haunting me and I’d like to get her off my case.”

  
“That’s exactly what you say,” Darcy hissed. “Except that last part. I’m not haunting you. If anything I’m haunting my apartment. It’s not my fault you just happened to be here.”

  
“Yeah, wrong place, wrong time, story of my life,” Bucky admitted as he finished his beer.

  
“What’s that, Buck?” He heard Steve yell from the bathroom just before the toilet flushed and he heard the sink go on.

  
“I said my beer’s gone, too,” he called. “Story of my life!” Bucky cringed. He was usually a better liar that this.

  
“Just say something before he leaves,” Darcy said, walking towards the door. “I don’t want to be stuck here any longer than is absolutely necessary.” She huffed. “I’ve already lost six months of my life, apparently.” She was still very shaken by that, but she was trying to get a lid on it. Getting upset seemed to make it harder to stay present and when she popped out, she never really knew how much time was passing. She didn’t really know anything when that happened.

  
“I’ll try, doll, it’s just-” he paused and lowered his voice again, hearing the bathroom door open. “It’s harder that it looks.”

  
She shook her head at him and glared. “You want to try hard? Try not being able to sit on your own goddamned couch because you’ll fall right through. That’s hard.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Short and sweet... but there's two, so yay!


	8. Bucky Also Gets Pushy

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> We finally get to find out what Steve may or may not know about things.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This is the second chapter posted today, so if you just jumped to here without reading chapter 7, go back, read that first.

Steve walked back into the room just as Bucky was rolling his eyes at her whining and fighting the urge to play ‘who has it worse?’ with a girl that, until a few hours ago, he was sure was nothing more than a figment of his imagination. It was time to turn on the Sargent Barnes Charm, he was so famous for.

 

Bucky coughed and turned to focus on his friend. “So, it sounds like all this stuff with the lawyers and the military is going to take a while, huh?” Bucky asked, trying to sound as casual as possible.

  
Steve nodded solemnly are reached out to put a hand on his shoulder and give him another one of those patented Steve Rogers’ Comforting Squeezes. “It might, Buck, but you can’t lose faith, or patience. It’ll all work out eventually.”

  
“Yeah, sure,” Bucky said, reaching up and squeezing Steve’s hand on his shoulder. “You sure I’ll be okay to stay here for a while? I mean, is the owner of this place going to show up and want their place and their stuff back?”

  
He watched carefully as the skin around Steve’s eyes tightened and he scowled. “I don’t think so. Don’t worry about that now. If something does change, I’ll find you a new place.”

  
“I’m not worried about that. Just wondering who’s bed I’m sleeping in, you know. Do I need to write them a thank you note?”

  
Steve’s eyes dropped and he looked deeply uncomfortable. “This place-,“ he started then shifted away from Bucky and picked his motorcycle jacket off the back of the couch. “The girl who lived here, well, she-” Steve walked to the door and Bucky thought maybe he would leave without finishing, but he turned back at the last second, his face sad. “She disappeared just before Christmas. She was- is sort of a friend of a friend. They don’t want to give up her place in case she does come back, but it’s been so long. I’m not sure that’s ever gonna happen.”

  
“What happened to her?” Bucky whispered, and noticed Darcy putting her hands over her mouth then, looking scared and nervous and afraid for what Steve would say next.

  
Steve shrugged, looking uncomfortable again. “She was supposed to meet a friend and never showed. Someone found her keys in the hallway, down by the elevator, but no one saw or heard anything. Nobody really knows.”

  
“But it looked like she was taken,” Bucky asked and Steve nodded again. “And that’s all you know? Nobody has any theories?”

  
Bucky watched as Steve cringed guiltily and did little shuffling thing he always did with his feet when he was getting ready to lie or was trying to hide something.

  
“Why are you getting so upset about this, Bucky?”

  
Bucky shook his head and stepped closer. “Don’t turn this back on me. What aren’t you telling me?”

  
Steve’s face flushed with embarrassment at being caught out and he turned to open the door. “Don’t worry about it. It’s an awful thing that happened to a nice girl, and it sucks, but there’s nothing we can do about it, Bucky, especially not you. I know you like running off to help all the damsels in distress, but there’s nothing you can do. Just forget it and stay here. Keep your head down.”

  
“I’m not gonna do anything, Steve, I’m not stupid. I just- I just need to know. I feel like you’re hiding something from me and I hate that. Please.” Bucky watched as his friend struggled to hold his ground, but the heartfelt please was his undoing.

  
“We’re pretty sure it was Hydra,” Steve said finally, and Bucky felt like he’d been punched in the gut. “You have to promise me, Bucky. Promise me you aren’t going to do anything about this. Miss Lewis has friends that are working with the police and the FBI to try and find her. This isn’t your fight. The last thing you need right now is to go out and draw attention to yourself, stir up trouble. Promise me,” Steve insisted, gripping Bucky’s upper arm.

  
Bucky glanced over at Darcy, who was shaking her head at him and looking desperate, her hands still over her mouth. He didn’t want to promise Steve not to help Darcy, but his friend wasn’t the kind to leave without getting what he wanted.

  
“Bucky!” Steve barked at him.

  
“Fine, fine, lay off, will ya Rogers! I promise! I’ll do my best to stay out of trouble, okay? Jesus,” Bucky said, shrugging his friend off.

  
“Sorry, Buck, I just know how you get-” he grimaced and then looked away, “I know how you used to get when there's a girl in trouble. You were never more reckless than when you were dizzy for a dame.”

  
Bucky wanted to roll his eyes and tell Steve how hypocritical he sounded, but held off, trying not to antagonize his friend.

  
“I know you don’t know her, but I just need to make sure. I can’t keep you safe if you run off, half-cocked over some personal crusade, and it’s important to me that you stay safe, okay.”

  
“Okay, okay, ya sap. Now get outta here. You’re big and important and you don’t wanna be out past your bedtime, Captain.”

  
“Call me if you need anything, okay? Even if I’m not in the city, I can arrange to have stuff brought over.

  
“Sure, Stevie, I’ll call you if I need someone to come tie my boots or wipe my ass, huh?” Bucky teased with a grin as he pushed his friend out the door. Inside, his stomach was in knots, but he could play the happy-go-lucky best friend if it meant getting rid of his mother hen.

  
“Jerk,” Steve muttered, but he let Bucky push him, and he had half a smile twisting his lips.

  
“Later, punk,” Bucky said with a wave and shut the door behind him. His face fell instantly when he turned to look for Darcy, but she was nowhere to be found.

  
She had disappeared again.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> The more things change, the more they stay the same. Am I right?


	9. Darcy Tells Bucky About Hydra

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Darcy explains a little bit about her history with Hydra.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> notes on possible spoliery things after the chapter, that explain where some of this came from.

The apartment was dark and silent around Darcy, so it was night again. She was able to remember herself fairly quickly again. It seemed like she might be getting the hang of this appearing out of nothing thing. That was sort of depressing. She didn’t want to get used to it. She wanted to get back to being a real girl again.

  
She sighed and flopped gracelessly over the back of her couch like she’d done a hundred times before. She lay there with her face pressed into the cushions and tried not to think about her situation or her feelings about her situation or the fact that Bucky Barnes had promised Captain America that he wouldn’t help her because the personification of truth and justice and freedom had asked him to promise it. She sort of managed for a whole three minutes, and then she remembered she wasn’t supposed to be able to lay on her couch and immediately fell right through to the floor.

  
That was really getting old, Darcy thought.

  
She would have just laid there in protest, but lying under the couch, (inside the couch?), was too unnerving, so she rolled towards the door and laid on the floor behind the couch looking up at the ceiling.

  
“Well, this sucks!” She huffed and blew her hair out of her face.

  
“Darcy?!” she heard calling from the bedroom and sighed again.

  
She heard the bedroom door creak open, and the slight muffled thumps of Bucky’s footsteps down the hallway.

  
He actually stepped right through her, not noticing her on the in his rush to find her.

  
“Down here,” she admitted wearily. She had sort of wanted to be alone so she could mope about her pathetic situation, but it wasn’t like she had any choice in the matter. She was stuck here. He was stuck here. She might as well get used to it.

  
“Oh shit, sorry,” he cursed and hopped out of her. “What are you doing on the floor? How long have you been back?”

  
She watched him crouch next to her and gave him a limp wave. “I was trying to mope on the couch, but even my pity party was canceled by me not really being here. I just got back a few minutes ago. Sorry if I woke you?” she guessed looking at his sleepwear.

  
“Nah, I wasn’t really sleeping. You know it’s like 2:30 in the morning, right? You’ve been gone for over 10 hours. I was starting to worry that you weren’t coming back.”

  
“Aw, Barnes, I didn’t know you cared,” she said with a slightly sarcastic smile.

  
“Yeah, well,” he groaned softly as he sat down next to her on the floor. “I guess Steve was right about me. I never could resist a damsel in distress.” He gave her a crooked grin before his face softened and he reached out to give her what would have been a nudge on her shoulder. “I was hoping to talk to you about what Steve said, but you left before I could.”

  
“Yeah, well,” she said with a grunt as she turned and sat up, legs crossed Indian style. “Apparently, whenever I get too upset I sort of… vanish into the void or something, I don’t know. I guess I can’t deal with strong emotions and keep my grasp on reality at the same time.”

  
Bucky frowned as he thought about that. “I think you’ve been disappearing for longer and longer each time, too. I’m not 100 percent sure about that. I mean, it could just be that you were so upset or something, but-”

  
She considered that. “Yeah, you’re probably right. Great, so whatever is going on with my body, or whatever, I’m starting to lose my hold here? How long till I just fade away completely?” She felt tears welling up in her eyes and reached up to rub them away with the back of her hand.

  
“Hey, don’t cry, doll. You just gotta stay calm, okay? We’ll figure this out. You wanna stick around? Then we’ll work at keeping you present. Nothing upsetting or traumatic, here, promise.”

  
She chuckled weakly as she finished wiping her face dry. “I thought I was just a mouthy, obnoxious dame that you couldn’t wait to get rid of?”

  
“Oh, um,” he hedged, looking shifty, “That’s true, but it just doesn’t seem fair of me to kick you out of your own home, you know. And I did say I would help you,” he added.

  
“You did,” she agreed, then frowned. “You also promised your best friend, the embodiment of truth, justice, and all things virtuous that you wouldn’t help me, so… yeah. I just don’t see you breaking that promise just for little old me who you just met… yesterday? Day before? Time is kind of funny for me right now.”

  
“Day before, but don’t sweat it, doll. I promised Steve I would try my best to stay out of trouble. And I will. We just have to figure out as much as we can from here, maybe do some internet searches, and sit tight. He did say you had friends trying to find you, right? Let’s just keep you happy and hanging out and give it some time. Push comes to shove then, well, I tried my best, right? Promise kept. Steve understands that sometimes you just gotta do what you gotta do.”

  
She risked a little half smile. “You’re a sneaky bastard, Barnes, but I don’t want you to risk yourself. Steve’s just worried about you being safe, and he isn’t the kind of guy to exaggerate and freak out for no reason. If he says you need to stay here-”

  
“The punk’s a bit of a mother hen that can’t seem to remember that I’m a highly trained assassin who is more that capable of taking care of myself,” he huffed and wrapped his arms around his knees so he could rest his chin on them. “Don’t you worry your pretty little head about it, doll.”

  
“Okay, ace.” Darcy laughed and tried to nudge him back, smiling sadly when her hand just brushed through his right shoulder. “Well, for now, let’s just go over what we know and see if we can figure anything else out.”

  
“Sounds like a plan,” Bucky nodded and turned to sit Indian style, facing her. “Thoughts on your abduction?”

  
Darcy twitched her mouth back and forth, squishing her face up and wrinkling her nose. “I guess it makes sense that it would be Hydra who took me. I mean, other than just a random abduction, I can’t think of any reason why someone else would want to take me. I don’t know anything and I’m not worth anything, I’m just Jane’s lab grunt, and a very under qualified one at that. Plus,” she said, looking down, “I kind of, maybe, have a history with them.”

  
“With Hydra?” Bucky asked, his eyebrows shooting up.

  
“Nothing like you,” she said, raising a hand reassuringly. “Just before the whole S.H.I.E.L.D. mess, I came to New York to deliver some of Dr. Selvig’s research to a division of S.H.I.E.L.D. studying the whole Loki attack. He was too busy in London with Jane looking over the convergence data, but he didn’t trust things to be secure enough to send them the files over the internet, and since I was the least important one of the bunch, or at least the one with a passport and no science to do, I got to play the delivery girl.”

  
Bucky nodded at her to continue, so she carried on, stealing herself to explain about one of the worst things to ever happen to her. She swallowed hard and talked fast.

  
“Okay, so I was supposed to supervise the data, make sure they only made the prearranged number of copies, whatever, and then take it back to Eric when they were done with it. I was working with these S.H.I.E.L.D. Agents, Smith and Cooper. They were, like, lab technicians, or something, I didn’t really follow the whole hierarchy thing there. Anyway, Cooper was okay, sort of very into science, reminded me of Jane some. He as all about the work and figuring things out, but the other guy, Agent Smith was a total douche bag. He was always talking to my chest and making inappropriate comments. He totally gave me the creeps.

  
“So one day, I walk into the lab and there’s Agent Smith, standing over Agent Cooper with a gun in his hand and Cooper is lying on the floor, bleeding everywhere, and there was a guard there and I was like, ‘Oh, goody, he’ll stop Smith!’ Only when he raises his gun, he points it at me. I was pretty sure he would have just shot me, too, but Smith said something about needing a suitable lab rat, so then-“

  
Darcy can feel herself starting to breathe harder and her heart pounding, which is ridiculous because she doesn’t even have a heart or lungs right now, not here, not really, but luckily Bucky puts his hand out towards her and she stops talking. Gratefully.

  
“Hey, its okay, Darcy, just breathe or whatever. You need to calm down. You’re starting to, like, get fuzzy around the edges. It’s okay, you don’t have to tell me all this.” His voice is soothing and low and he looks like he’d be patting her on the arm if he could or maybe reaching for her hand.

  
She appreciates the thought, though, and takes a few deep breaths. Once she feels steadier, she nods her thanks and presses the back of her hands to her eyes. “Okay, so Reader’s Digest version, they took me with them to D.C. and then this other guy, a scary looking grizzly Adams type, told Smith that he only had orders to extract Smith and his cargo, and he wasn’t prepared to take an extra passenger where they were going. So, they had to leave me in D.C. with the guard and a bunch of other scientist types.

  
“Smith said he would be back for me, but I guess S.H.I.E.L.D. fell pretty soon after that and when Agent Romanoff released all of information about Hydra and S.H.I.E.L.D. onto the internet, well-” Darcy takes a deep breath. “Jane said I was only gone for 8 days. When the military police guys raided the facility they found me. I was kind of out of it because- because of some of the stuff they’d done, but they I.D.’d me and found the missing person’s report Jane had filed, so the called her and she came and got me.”

  
She stood up and started pacing a bit, shaking her hands out and trying to get herself to relax. Bucky stood as well, leaning against the couch and trying to stay out of her way while he watched her and waited patiently. Not that it mattered if he was in her way at all, but, again, she appreciated the sentiment.

  
“After that Thor decided to relocate to New York so that he could work with Tony and Steve to help clean up the mess left behind, and, of course, where Thor goes, Jane goes and where Jane goes, I go. Which was all well and good, but I didn’t really want to live with them and have them hovering over me all the time like I was some broken thing just waiting to fall apart, and since Tony started paying for Jane’s science and I started making a living supplying her with supervision and sustenance, then I could afford to get my own place. I lived here and traveled all over the world with Jane when she went to give science presentations on everything she and Eric had discovered, and I was fine. I mean I had some anxiety, and PTSD stuff, so I was seeing a therapist about that to help get it under control, but I guess I always wondered if-“

  
She paused and looked up at Bucky, her eyes wide and face pale.

  
“You wondered if Smith might come back for you, like he said,” he finished, face mostly blank, though his eyes seemed to convey both sympathy and understanding without making her feel like that broken thing.

  
Darcy nodded and shrugged her shoulders. “Yeah.” She could still feel the tension in her body and was growing frustrated by the old anxious feelings reemerging. “Let’s talk about something else for a while. Something nice.”

  
“Sure, doll, whaddaya wanna talk about?”

  
“Did you ever have any pets?” she asked suddenly, and the question caught him so off guard that he laughed out loud.

  
“Uh, no, sorry,” he said after she laughed awkwardly back at him. “Pets were sort of a thing people with money had, back in my day. My family was fairly comfortable, but that’s cause my ma was pretty frugal with all my dad’s earnings. Plus, Steve was allergic to everything back then so-”

  
“Oh,” she said, sounding disappointed. “I guess that makes sense.” She continued to pace, biting on one of her thumbnails. “You want to watch a movie? We could watch something light and funny.”

  
He nodded and gestured at her TV. “You have any favorites you think I need to see?” he asked, willing to let her drag him into the cavernous abyss that was modern media if it would help her relax.

  
“You bet I do,” she laughed and walked over to pick up the remote. “Oh, right,” she sighed when she failed to make it move even an inch. “You think you can drive? I’ll tell you what to push.”

  
He nodded and sat on the couch, picking up the small, black, plastic rectangle. “Lead the way, Kimo Sabe.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Okay, so in the grand tradition of trying to keep this as cannon compliant as possible, I've tied the story into a few other things. This is the first one. Marvel's Avengers: Age of Ultron Prelude – This Scepter'd Isle is a comic that talks about Strucker, the twins, and a few other things. The important part for this is that there is a bit from a place called S.H.I.E.L.D. S.T.A.T.I.O.N. with some agents studying Loki stuff, and one of them gets recruited by Strucker and Hydra. I've added Darcy to that, filling her in behind the scenes so to speak. It was a place that made sense with her connection to Selvig and worked with my personal timeline for this story.
> 
> So no, I didn't make up Agent Smith. He's cannon.


	10. Bucky Helps Darcy Find a Seat

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Movies, French toast and bar stools, oh my!

Bucky watched, fascinated, as Darcy deliberated. She didn’t want anything too raunchy, she said, for his sake, or anything that would remind her of her situation, for hers, and eventually decided on Ferris Bueller’s Day Off.

  
It was pretty entertaining, though he actually spent more time watching her than he did the movie. About 15 minutes in, she’d sat down on the couch, not even looking back at it, just following some inborn instinct to sit while watching a movie, and she was so caught up in the film that she never even noticed.

  
As the movie was ending, Bucky noticed the view outside the windows starting to get lighter and lighter by the second. He was dead tired, having slept not at all the night before and only a few hours the night before that. He’d tried, but his worry over the vanishing girl had made it impossible.

  
Still, he’d gone longer without sleep, and he didn’t want to risk her going away on him again.

  
“So, what do you want to do now?” Darcy asked, leaning her head on her hand, her elbow propped up on her knee.

  
Bucky shrugged. Then his stomach growled.

  
Darcy looked shocked and then pleased by the sound.

  
“You should eat something,” she suggested.

  
“Okay. Come sit at the counter and talk to me while I scramble some eggs?” Bucky asked, standing and walking for the kitchen.

  
“You’re gonna have scrambled eggs again?” She made a rude noise with her lips and tongue that had him turning to watch as she plopped down on the stool he’d pulled out for her. “Live a little, Barnes. If I was corporeal right now I would totally make you some awesome French toast.”

  
“French toast, huh?” He opened the fridge and gazed inside. “I think I can handle French toast. All I need is bread, milk and eggs, right?”

  
“Sure,” she scoffed, “If you want lame French toast. Look up in the spice cupboard there. If Jane hasn’t packed them away you should be able to find cinnamon, nutmeg, and my fancy not-imitation-thank-you-very-much vanilla.”

  
He gave her a skeptical look over his shoulder as he placed the milk and eggs on the counter opened the cupboard she’d indicated. “Am I making breakfast here, or dessert?”

  
Darcy just laughed at him. “If you’re doing breakfast right, dude, the answer to that question is yes.”

  
He just shook his head and then followed her instructions as she directed him on how much to use of what and which was the best pan to use. While he fried up his breakfast, she chattered on and on to him about how she’d introduced Thor to breakfast foods, especially coffee and about his penchant for shattering glassware.

  
That led her to talking more about the Asgardian Prince and his sweetheart Jane, who was not only a Doctor of Astrophysics, but Darcy’s boss and best friend.

  
“So you think Jane’s the one keeping your place open and working with the police,” Bucky asked, leaning against the counter across from her as he devoured his breakfast. It was indeed awesome.

  
Darcy nodded, frowning slightly. “It has to be. I mean, it might actually be Tony who’s paying my rent, but the last time I saw Thor he was back for a quick trip right before Thanksgiving, and then he said he was heading back to look into some “disturbing rumors” and that it might be a while before he got a chance to return.”

  
Bucky tried not to shift uncomfortably every time she brought up Stark, but apparently he failed because, after a moment of awkward silence she asked, “Okay, so what’s your deal with Tony? You get twitchy every time I say his name.”

  
Bucky scowled and shrugged.

  
“Look, I know the guy can be a total asshat sometimes, but he’s sort of not that bad once you get to know him. He’s just- he’s a bit of an acquired taste. You have to be able to see past the bullshit and not let him push you around, but then, underneath it all, like way underneath, he’s actually kind of a sweet guy,” she finished, sounding not so sure.  
Bucky looked up at her as if she’d sprouted another head. “Okay, you’re right. Sweet guy is pushing it. But he does actually give a shit, no matter how much he pretends not to.”

  
Bucky just shrugged again. “He’s a Stark. Every one I’ve ever met could be very charming when they wanted to.”  
She narrowed her eyes at him again. “Okay, spill. Seriously, did he piss in your cheerios or something?”

  
Bucky sighed and told her all about what had happened over the last couple months. When he was finished she was gaping at him with her mouth half open.

  
“That’s some heavy shit,” she said, expression kind of blank. “I mean, what the actual fuck?! I get kidnapped for a few months and the world just goes straight to hell. I can’t leave you superheroes alone for a minute, can I? Jesus Christ, it’s like kids pissing in the sandbox and fighting over the playground toys.”

  
He gave her a defensive scowl. “It’s a little more complicated than that, Lewis.”

  
“Oh, it’s Lewis now, huh?” She gave him a steely eyed look. “Well, you’re all lucky I wasn’t around for that shit storm. I’d have smacked all ya’ll’s on the nose with a rolled up newspaper and sent you to time out!” she declared with great bluster and determination.

  
He finally let his face melt into a half smirk. “I’d have paid money to see that, actually.”

  
“That’s right,” she said, fighting her own smile. “I’m a Poli-Sci graduate. I’d have handled that bullshit right quick.”

  
“Too bad you weren’t around then,” he said, his smile softening sadly, “Sounds like we really could have used your expertise.”

  
“Yeah, well, apparently I was indisposed.”

  
Bucky sighed and took his dishes to the sink to clean up. “Sorry, doll, I guess I just can’t help being a downer.”

  
With his back turned, all he heard was her shriek. He whirled around fast enough that his plate shattered in the sink when he dropped it.

  
She wasn’t sitting at the counter anymore. In fact, he couldn’t see her at all.

  
“Darcy!” he called frantically and leaped around the end of the counter.

  
“God damned fucking piece of shit!” she cursed from her seat on the floor.

  
His heart was still pounding in his chest from his moment of adrenaline fueled panic and he gasped for air as he tried not to laugh with relief. “Guess you finally realized you were sitting there,” he said, voice choked with suppressed chuckles. He was just so relieved that she was still there, still okay.

  
“Yes, that’s what I get for acting like a real girl, I guess,” she pouted as she climbed back to her feet.

  
“Aw, don’t be like that, doll. You sat on the couch for almost the whole movie, too. I didn’t want to say anything because-” he waved at the floor. “You can do it. You just have to have a little faith in yourself, or be totally oblivious. Either way.”

  
She gave him a glare that was probably supposed to look more menacing than adorable, and he did his best to show penitence. Only he couldn’t help but hearing her stream of curse words in his head and his smile just kept creeping back.

  
“Yeah, yeah, laugh it up, tin man,” she growled and he raised his hands in submission.

  
“Okay, okay, let’s figure this out,” he said, finally getting a better hold on himself. “There has to be a better way to approach this.”

  
“How?” she asked, arms crossed over her chest and crease forming between her eyebrows.

  
“Just, turn around, okay, and close your eyes,” he instructed, twirling his finger in demonstration.

  
“What? How’s that going to help?” she asked, suspicion and stubborn pride radiating out of every pore.

  
“Just trust me, okay? I want to try something.”

  
She stared him down, looking him right in the face for almost half a minute before she sighed and turned her back to him and the stool. “I’m choosing to trust you, Buckaroo, don’t blow this. I will full-out DARCY you.

  
“What?” he laughed nervously and picked up the stool. “What’s that mean?”

  
“’My good opinion, once lost, is lost forever,” she quoted, her chin high and her accent stuffy and British.

  
He snorted and shook his head. “My sister Rebecca loved that stupid book,” he grumbled and peeked around to make sure her eyes were closed.

  
“It’s not stupid,” she huffed, but kept her eyes closed. “What am I doing then?”

  
“Okay,” he began and held the stool with his left hand while he ran his hand over the seat, “I want you to think about how the stool feels. Its sturdy wooden legs, hard and smooth, its cushioned seat, with its textured plaid cover. I want to think about how it felt to sit on it, push it around and lean on it with your hand on the seat. Can you see it in your mind? Feel it?”

  
It took her a second, and then she nodded.

  
“Okay, now put out your hand,” he instructed, and she did, holding it open to the side like she was waiting for her to hand her something. “Turn your palm down and lower your arm, doll, it’s a stool, not a penny candy.”

  
She snorted, but did as he had asked.

  
“Okay, keep your eyes closed and think about how the seat of the stool felt under your fingertips. Have you got it?” He stepped closer to her and lifted the seat to her hand.

  
“Yes,” she whispered, and she sounded like she was concentrating very hard now. Her forehead even had that cute little wrinkle.

  
“On the count of three, I’m going to put the stool against the bottom of your hand and I want you to feel it,” he whispered softly.

  
“But I can’t-“ Darcy began to protest, but he stopped her.

  
“You can, Darcy. I know you can. I’ve seen you do it. You’ve seen you do it. Okay?” Bucky kept his voice level and insistent.

  
“Okay,” she eventually admitted. “Okay, let’s do this.”

  
“All right, one,” he inched the stool closer. “Two,” he took a breath and prepared to get it as close to touching without passing through her as he could. “Three,” he finished, the word not much more than a breath.

  
Darcy’s face instantly lifted as her eyes few open and she turned to look at where she was now touching the seat. “I can feel it!” The joy in her expression made Bucky grin right back.

  
“Okay, next,” he said and lowered the seat to the floor. “I want you to sit on it. Remember to think about how it feels underneath that lovely backside of yours. Close your eyes if you have to.”

  
She did close her eyes, reaching her hand out and feeling for the seat like a blind woman might in a strange room. When her fingers brushed the seat they stopped and her grin widened again. She shifted, stepping back and hopped up on the seat, easy as pie.

  
“Barnes, you are the best!” she laughed, bouncing up and down lightly and opening her eyes. “If I could, I’d kiss you!”

  
“Baby steps, doll,” he laughed, determined not to blush, “baby steps.”

  
She turned on the stool and faced the kitchen, then turned back to him, going as far as to rest her feet up on the cross bar, lifting her knees with the new position. Her curve hugging dress was just long enough to cover the bend of her knee, though it rode up a bit higher as she rocked back and forth gently.

  
When she caught him eyeing the curve of her calves, she blushed and lowered her legs, jumping up. “So,” she said, clearing her throat and trying to tame her uncontrollable smile. “What’s next?”

  
He tilted his head and considered. “You wanna try moving the stool next?”

  
“Sure. If I can do that, it would be a total game changer. We could probably even use it to convince others that I’m really here,” she said excitedly.

  
“Do your worst,” he said, waving at the stool once more.

  
Darcy reached her hand out and rested it on the seat once more, and then she moved her hand around to the side of the cushion and pushed. It looked like she was fighting against some resistance for just a moment before sliding through.

  
“Try again,” Bucky prompted, and she did.

  
She tried a dozen more times, all with the same frustrating result. She sighed in irritation and stepped back to lean against the arm of the couch.

  
“It’s no good, Bucky. If I focus, then my surroundings have an impact on me, but I just can’t affect my surroundings. I’m not really here, not physically. I’m just energy or a memory or something even less substantial.” She folded her arms and looked like she was trying not to cry again.

  
“Hey, none of that, now. You have to keep your chin up, remember? I need you to think happy thoughts, doll,” he gently reminded her and stepped closer, bending his head to try and catch your eye. “Let’s do something else. What would you like to do? We need something to cheer you up.”

  
“I miss my iPod,” she sighed lifting her head and looking around. “It’s too quiet in here. I used to always play music when I was at home.”

  
“Okay, music! Great! I don’t know what an iPod is, but I’m sure we can get some tunes going. Tell me what to do.”

  
She smiled at him and stood straight again. “Okay. Thanks, Bucky,” she said, almost a whisper. “I mean it. I don’t know what I’d do if you weren’t here.”

  
“My pleasure, doll,” he smiled back and was only a little surprised to find that he really meant it.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> That's right, in Civil War _mumble mumble mumble..._
> 
> and that's what happened! Ta da!


	11. Darcy Introduces Bucky to the Future

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Darcy gives Bucky a tour of her iTunes and starts him on the journey or catching up with Disney. Then she puts him down for a nap.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Okay, so I'm posting an extra chapter today because I am just so totally thrilled about the wonderful aoisakai (http://archiveofourown.org/users/aoisakai/pseuds/aoisakai) made a graphic for this story and posted a fic rec on tumblr. You guys have just been so great, I couldn't help myself. I didn't get a lot of writing done on it this week because of the Wintershock Winter Challenge run my MCUWintershock over there, which I will be posting probably either today or tomorrow, but I'm feeling extra motivated now and plan on getting a lot done on it this week. You guys seriously keep me going with all the kudos and comments. So, thank you, so much!

Graphic by aoisakai

 

Darcy helped Bucky get his laptop out and piggy back on Mr. Dobbin’s Wi-Fi, just like she always had. Once he had downloaded and opened iTunes, she had him sign into her account and authorized his computer. With that done, she directed him on how to download purchases, and soon Adele and the Arctic Monkeys were filling the room.

  
“It’ll take a while to download it all,” she sighed longingly and gave him another of her charming smiles, “and none of my playlists are on your computer, but we can make your own playlists, if you want. I can help you.”

  
She does.

  
They spend over 8 hours downloading and listening to music. She shares some of her favorites with him and he introduces her to some of the stuff he used to listen to back in his day. She helps him make a playlist of new songs that he likes and sings and dances for him until she’s laughing and breathless and smiling so much her face hurts.

  
They take a break for lunch and she laughs at him when he gets bread from his sandwich caught in the shifting joint of his left hand. He scowls at her for that, but she just sticks her tongue out at him and tells him turn about it fair play.

  
When they’re tired of music she insists that they watch all the major Disney movies that he missed, starting with Bambi, which had come out in theaters while he was in Europe fighting with the 107th, and Cinderella. Halfway through Alice and Wonderland, though, he starts to lose his battle against exhaustion, and after his fourth nod and bob, she tells him it’s time for him to go to bed.

  
“I’m okay, doll,” he insists, straightening his shoulders and sitting upright. “It’s only just after 5,” he whines. “It’s too early for bed, besides, I don’t want to risk you popping off on me.”

  
She rolls her eye and stands up. “When was the last time you slept?” When he just shrugs, she turns her back and stalks down the hall to the bedroom, sure he’ll follow.

  
Sure enough, he pops in the door just as she sitting down on the bed. “Did Jane steal my foam pad?” she asks, rubbing her hand over the blankets. “And where’s my comforter?”

  
“In the closet,” he replies, a bit sheepishly. “Bed was too soft.”

  
She hums in acceptance of that fact and pulls herself across the bed to lie down on the far side. “Lay down, Barnes. You need sleep.”

  
“But Darcy, doll-,“ he starts but she just sits up and glares at him.

  
“Don’t ‘Darcy, doll’ me.” She points at the bed next to her. “I’m not going anywhere. You’re no good to me if you’re just going to snore through the best parts of the movies.”

  
“I don’t snore,” he grumbles, but gives in and lies down stiffly on top of the blankets, just like she is.

  
“No way,” she protests, “get your cute little ass under the covers, Barnes. I need you to take this seriously.”

  
He sighs and slides under the blankets. Darcy watches as he tugs and them and shifts around. Whenever he moves enough to pull on the ones beneath her she can see them moving through her body, but once he settles, she looks perfectly normal lying atop them. It’s a bit disconcerting, but she’s really starting to get the hang of this on top of furniture thing.

  
Eventually, her eyes make it back to Bucky’s face and she’s delighted to see his eyes are closed and his expression relaxed.

  
“I’m never gonna be able to sleep with you starin’ like that, doll,” he says, eyes still shut.

  
“Fine,” she says and rolls onto her back and looks up at her ceiling. She has little plastic stars stuck above her bed and they make her smile. It isn’t near dark enough for them to glow, yet, but they still make her thing of Jane and the deserts of New Mexico.

  
She starts telling him, in a quiet, hushed voice about her time in Puente Antiguo and all the times she and Jane would drive out into the darkness of the desert at night searching for anomalies and taking readings. She hears him chuckle quietly when she talks of Thor landing and how she tasered him, and by the time she gets to the part where she was rescuing Baker, he was breathing long and deep and sound asleep.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I know it's short, but sweet. Only one more before things start moving a lot more quickly!


	12. Bucky is Secretly a Nerd

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Secret fears shared in the dark...

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry it's another short one. They do start getting longer, though, I swear!

When Bucky opened his eyes again it was pretty dark in the bedroom, but he could still make out the outline of Darcy’s profile next to him. In his sleep he’d rolled on his side to face her, and now he laid there and looked at her quietly. Once again, he found himself greatly relieved that she was still there.

  
“How long was I out?” he asked eventually, and she jumped slightly and then turned on her side to face him.

  
“A long time,” she said, sounding really board. “A watch doesn’t really go with this dress, so I don’t know how long exactly, but it felt like it was about 8 million years.”

  
He snorted and rubbed his face into the pillow. “Hey, no complaints. You’re the one that insisted I get some sleep.”

  
“That’s right, and you obviously needed it. And just for the record, you do snore. Not as loud as some I’ve heard, but you get this gurgling ripping sound in the back of your throat when you’re really out of it and-”

  
“Lies and slander,” he said with a smile, cutting her off. “Is libel still a thing now-a-days?”

  
“You gonna sue me, Barnes?” she asked with a laugh. “You're already living in my apartment and using all my stuff. You want more than that, you’ll have to find me first,” she grinned, and then, realizing what she’d said, frowned and looked suddenly too sad for words.

  
“Hey, doll, none of that,” he reached a hand out, as if to touch her face, but lowered it at the last second and placed it under his face. “Don’t cry, Darce.”

  
He watched her face struggle to maintain composure before she sniffed and wiped at her eyes.

  
“Do you think I’m dead, Bucky? Do you think Hydra took me and killed me, and that’s why I’m like this?” she whispered, her eyes studying his face as she spoke.

  
“No, I don’t,” he said with a frown. “Don’t talk like that. You can’t give up hope, Darcy.” He was going for stern reassurance, but he was worried he just sounded like he was in desperate denial.

  
“I just hate not knowing. I hate the idea that I’ve become part of a statistic, you know. Single young woman swallowed up by the harsh reality of New York City,” she said like some hardened news announcer. “But part of me thinks that might be better than the alternative. I mean, if Hydra has me, who knows what they’re doing with me? With my body?” Her voice was small and frightened and it chilled him straight to his core. “Last time- the last time was not good, but it could have been so much worse and they’ve had me for 6 months. 6 months, Buck! I know that’s nothing compared to what happened to you, and you’re the last person I should be complaining to about Hydra, but-“

  
“Don’t worry about that. It’s okay to be scared. I hate the thought of- of you-” his voice cracked and he stopped trying to make words happen for a second while he willed his emotions under control. “You just can’t focus on that kind of thing, okay? I don’t think you’re dead. If you were just some kind of ghost then why can I see you? It’s possible that they changed you, like they changed me, only different. Maybe you’re here because they gave you some cool mind powers like astral projection or telepathy.”

  
She gave him a funny look. “Astral projection? Where’d you hear big words like that, Barnes?”

  
“Hey,” he said, pretending offense. “I read. I used to read a lot, actually. Not as much as Stevie, but enough.”

  
“Don’t tell me you’re a closet geek, Barnes.” The smile she was giving him was pure mischievous glee.

  
“What’s that even mean, Lewis?”

  
“Oh, you know, a little too smart, a little too into science fiction and fantasy, that kind of thing,” she teased.

  
“There’s no such thing as too smart, or too into that other stuff either,” he said, sticking his nose in the air. “Don’t be a snob, Lewis.”

  
She laughed at him then, and he felt his heart swell a little at distracting her from her worries, if only for another few hours.

  
“Some of the best times Stevie and I had, as a couple of kids, was talking about comics and trading pulps. When we weren’t out getting into scrapes, anyway,” he admitted.

  
“Tell me more,” she said, smiling as she lay next to him in the dark.

  
So, he did.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This is the last chapter of cutesy relationship building stuff, promise. Not that I think you guys mind that overly much ;) but it will be picking up from here on out.


	13. Darcy Gets a Clue

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> hold onto your butts....

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> IMPORTANT NOTE ABOUT SPOILERS!!!
> 
> Okay, so some of you may have noticed that I added a couple things to the tags. That's right, I'm tying in Agents of S.H.I.E.L.D. For some of you this may be exciting news! For others... not so much. So here's the low down:
> 
> If you watch AoS and you're all caught up- you should be golden. You'll know who I'm talking about and what their deal is.
> 
> If you don't watch AoS, but you also don't care about spoilers- you should be fine. The important bits are either self explanatory or will be explained later in the story. It doesn't really play a large roll here, just a crucial one.
> 
> If you haven't seen the show, or season 3, but you want to eventually and you don't want spoilers- you might want to go get caught up before you continue reading. I mean... you should anyway. Season 1 was pretty good, season 2 was so so, but season 3 has been amazeballs. 
> 
> As for a bit of good news: Since I've included some stuff in my story that makes assumptions about the second half of season 3 of AoS I want to have this finished and posted by the time it comes back at the beginning of March so that it can be completed before it starts getting Jossed. That's the goal anyway.

Darcy listened to Bucky talk for hours. She listened to him talk about his folks and his siblings, the neighborhood in Brooklyn where he grew up with Steve, his scrawny best friend who had asthma and a bad ticker and just about everything else bad a person could have and still be up and walking around.

  
He told her about some of the fights they’d gotten into, about surviving through the depression and about what America was like perched on the edge of a world war. He only brushed briefly over his life after he got drafted, basic training and fighting on the front lines, but he did tell lots of stories about the other Howling Commandos and about Steve showing up as Captain America.

  
He made everything sound both strange and fantastic, and yet he was still more believable to her than her high school history text book.

  
She let his voice wash over her and lull her into a calm sense of peace. He was the perfect distraction until he wasn’t.

  
“Hey, Barnes,” she interrupted, and he paused right away.

  
“Yeah?”

  
“I’m sorry for calling you an ass hole before. I don’t really think you’re an ass hole. Most of the time.”

  
He grinned at her and tipped his head up on his hand to wink at her. “Right back atcha, doll.”

  
She rolled her eyes and was just about to comment on his being a shameless flirt when he sat up, hand stretched over her protectively and his finger raised to his lips.

  
“What?” she asked, sitting up right through his hand. “What is it?”

  
“Someone’s at the door,” he whispered so quietly she almost missed it. “Stay here,” he added as he crawled out of bed and pulled gun from somewhere she didn’t even see.

  
“No, wait, it’s better if I look,” she argued and jumped off the bed. “You stay here,” she bit back and then walked through the doorway into the hall.

  
“Darcy!” she heard him hiss behind her, but she kept going.

  
“They can’t hear me or see me, Barnes, just sit tight. It’s probably just Ste-”

  
She stopped cold as the door swung open and Jane peered through, looking around nervously before turning on the lights.

  
“Jane?” Darcy asked, surprised and startled, and feeling excitement and joy bubbling up in her chest. “It’s Jane!” she yelled back to Bucky. “Put the gun away, Barnes.”

  
“Hello!?” Jane called and Darcy turned to see Bucky stick his head out of the bedroom.

  
“Don’t move,” he barked and Darcy saw Jane tense up immediately. He walked down the hallway, his gun still in hand, though not pointed at her friend, which was some small relief, she supposed.

  
“Shit!” Jane cursed and raised her hands. “I called the police! They’re on their way here now.”

  
Bucky scowled at Jane and then looked to Darcy.

  
“She’s probably lying?” Darcy shrugged. “I don’t think she’d be here if the police were on their way. What is she doing here anyway? Didn’t Steve tell her you were staying here?”

  
“What are you doing here?” Bucky asked, his face angry and menacing.

  
“What are you doing here? This is my apartment,” Jane said, glaring right back, though her voice was just the slightest bit shaky.

  
“That’s a lie. I was told by Steve Rogers that this place was currently vacant,” Bucky tried.

  
“Steve told you that?” Jane finally really looked at him, then raised her eyebrows as she said, “You’re that Winter Soldier guy everyone’s freaking out about in the news.”

  
“James Barnes,” he said coldly. “That still doesn’t explain what you’re doing here.”

  
“Come on, Jane, just tell him,” Darcy murmured as she hovered next to her friend.

  
Jane looked at Bucky’s face, his arm, his gun, then sighed and shook her head.

  
“Steve really told you that you could stay here?” she asked, sounding very tired.

  
Bucky nodded and lowered his gun another inch. “He did. You’re Jane?”

  
“Dr. Foster,” Darcy prompted.

  
“Dr. Foster, right?” he said, following Darcy’s lead.

  
“Yes, Captain Rogers told you about me?” Jane said, frowning again.

  
Bucky shrugged.

  
“Tell her he told you about me,” Darcy pressed, feeling her excitement grow even more. If they could get Jane on their side…

  
“He told me a bit about this place, your friend Darcy and how she’s gone missing. Said you were still looking for her. That why you’re here? You coming to check up on the place?”

  
Jane shook her head. “No, I mean, yes, sort of. I’m still looking for Darcy. I got an alert her bank account had some charges on it today. I was just looking into that.”

  
“Shit,” Darcy groaned. “The music!” She’d purchased a dozen songs or so for him without even thinking about it. “She probably had the IP address traced back here. Fuck, we’re totally busted,” Darcy groaned and put her face in her hands. “Quick, Barnes, think of something!”

  
He shot her a quick glare and then shrugged. “I found a log in and password and figured no one would mind. I planned on paying it back once I got my financial situation figured out.”

  
“Well, that’s kind of rude,” Jane said without really thinking, but Darcy thought maybe that meant she was buying it. “You were just going through her stuff and decided to use her iTunes account?”

  
He shrugged again. “It’s been kind of boring,” he admitted, making it sound like a reluctant confession. “Sorry.”

  
Jane sighed again. “Yeah, well, don’t do it again, and I’m going to double check with Captain Rogers and make sure you’re really legit.”

  
“Go ahead,” he said and holstered his gun.

  
Darcy was both proud and amused when Jane pulled her phone from her pocket and dialed the Captain. She never even once stopped to consider the fact that it was just after 3 in the morning- according to the clock on her microwave.

  
“Yeah, Steve?” Jane paused to listen for a second and then let her face twist into a scowl as she began to pace and rant at the poor guy over the phone. “I didn’t think, when you asked me for the spare keys to Darcy’s place that you were going to stash your Hydra assassin best friend here.” Another pause. “No, he’s fine, I’m fine, we’re both fine. He was just snooping where he shouldn’t be and pinged an alert on one of Darcy’s accounts so I came over to check it out.” Pause. “Hell, if I know.”

  
After another long pause she held the phone out to Bucky with a smug smirk on her face. “He wants to talk to you,” she said, voice full of schadenfreude.

  
“Steve?” Bucky said and grimaced as he apparently caught the backlash of Jane’s anger at his friend. “No, it was just a stupid-” His eyes rolled up as he stared at the ceiling. “Uh huh. No. No!” he growled and reached to pinch the bridge of his nose with his free hand. “Jesus fuck, Steve, I didn’t think it would be-”

  
After another full minute like this, Bucky turned and walked down the hallway and into his bedroom, apparently needing some privacy.

  
Darcy watched as Jane looked around the room, her arms crossed and her foot tapping impatiently.

  
“So hey, Jane,” Darcy said, walking around to stand in front of her friend, “It’s, like, really good to see you, you know. I wish you could hear me. I have so many questions…”

  
Jane sighed heavily and put her hands in her pockets. “Hurry up, guys,” she muttered under her breath and rolled her shoulders impatiently. “Stupid false alarm,” she added after another minute, scuffing her two against the carpet.

  
When she pulled her hands out of her pockets, Jane had something in her hand that jingled lightly as she fiddled with it. Darcy frowned and looked closer.

  
It was her keys.

  
The little Mjolnir keychain rolled between Jane’s fingers as she played with it.

  
Darcy couldn’t look away.

  
Her keys. There was something about her keys…

  
She remembered. She remembered everything.

 

* * *

 

  
**_December 12th, 2015_ **

 

_When Darcy came to, she felt very groggy, but she wasn’t in much pain, which was nice, but she was cold, which wasn’t._

  
_She was lying on a large cement floor, the line of it disappearing off into darkness, and could see a few pairs of feet as they obscure her line of vision across its great expanse. That was when the voices started coming together to make sense._

  
_“-acted too soon. Her disappearance will alert the others. It’s going to be nearly impossible to get to Foster and Selvig now.” The man’s voice was calm, cultured, but it’s pretty obvious, even to groggy Darcy that he’s fairly upset._

  
_“How were we supposed to know she hadn’t left, yet. We’d planned on grabbing her when she came home, like you ordered, but she saw our face and we didn’t want to risk her telling anyone about us. We figured it was better to grab her now then risk losing her later.” The other man sounded nervous and defensive. If he was one of the men that had, indeed, ‘grabbed her’, then she didn’t feel sorry for him._

  
_Jane was going to be so pissed that she was missing the party._

  
_“Moving too soon may have cost us everything. This girl was only supposed to be used as leverage for the other two, to gain their cooperation. Alone she’s worthless. You have failed me.”_

  
_“We’re sorry, Mr. Malick. It won’t happen again.”_

  
_“You’re right, it won’t,” a new voice added. This voice was chilling and dead in a way that just screamed creepy, awful evil. It made the skin on the back of Darcy’s neck try to crawl up over her head and run away with her hair._

  
_The next sound that followed was horrific and brutal, like flesh hitting pavement at high speed accompanied by a wet, tearing gush._

  
_Darcy squeezed her eyes shut and tried not to whimper. She felt something splash her face and flinched away, fighting the urge to curl into a ball._

  
_“She’s awake,” that inky, black voice said again, the razor ice edges of it cutting her deep. She put her arms over her head and tried to block it out._

  
_“If she has no knowledge of how to create the portals then she is a liability,” the first guy, Malick said and Darcy felt her stomach lurch._

  
_“She may hold the key to what we seek. Over the vast millennia that I was forced to sit and wait, I learned some very important lessons.”_

  
_Key, key, key, that word rattled around in her brain like a handful of change in an empty dryer. Where were her keys? She’d had them in her hand. If she could find them she could press the panic button located on her key-chain, the one shaped like mew mew._

  
_“First, I learned patience. It really is a virtue, you know, and though I’ve never been one to place too much stock in virtue as a whole, this particular trait can be quite valuable.” The words grew louder as the source of the voice approached, and Darcy felt an instinctive call to fight or flight._

  
_She lurched up and tried to get her feet under her so that she could run. She had to run. Run and hide and find her keys and get help._

  
_Unfortunately for Darcy, her feet were too unsteady, and her pockets empty._

  
_She felt the hand circle her arm an instant before the smell hit her. She was lifted and turned, her face coming around to look into the cold dead stare of the thing. Even her panicking mind hesitated to call it a man, though it did bear some resemblance._

  
_The thing had once had a handsome face, perhaps with his dark hair and eyes, and a square, masculine jaw. All his features were just a bit off, now, however, twisted and angled just a little too sharp, and his eyes looked bruised and his cheek held a small gash that looked almost putrid with discoloration. There also seemed to be something moving under his skin._

  
_Darcy screamed._

  
_The thing smiled coldly._

  
_“I also learned that you should never throw anything away that you can hang on to. You never know what might come in handy later.”_

  
_Darcy felt frozen in the thing’s gaze. She’d never really understood the phrase deer in headlights, until now._

  
_“Fine,” Malick said, sounding weary and resigned. “I’ll have my men throw her into one of the stasis units for now. That will give us some time to find a way to get to Dr.’s Foster and Selvig."_

  
_“Excellent,” the thing said and grinned._

  
_Darcy wanted to vomit._

  
_“Take her and get her prepped,” Malick ordered a couple other figures Darcy hadn’t even really noticed. They stepped around the mess on the floor and approached the thing cautiously. They didn’t dare take her from it, though, only waited until the thing turned and tossed her at them like she weighed nothing._

  
_The two guys each took an arm and started leading her off down, what she could now see were rows running between impossibly high shelves with large, shadowy boxes hanging suspended on every level. It was hard for her brain to wrap around what she was seeing._

  
_She tried to dip her hands into the pockets of her coat, inconspicuously searching for her keys, but the jarring motion of the men’s quick pace had her half stumbling to keep up and half being dragged behind them._

  
_They came to a glass walled room after a while and they took her inside. There were several people in lab coats, spanning the space at intervals. Some were working on figures, lying on concave, stainless still tables with drains and hoses that reminded Darcy of something she’d seen on CSI. In the morgue._

  
_“No, no, no,” she began to cry as the two men lifted her onto the closest available table._

  
_“Got another one for you,” one of her captors called to the closest technician._

  
_“No, no, not me, I’m not, let me go!” she whined as she began struggling in earnest. “My keys, my keys,” she heard herself saying as she searched her coat pockets frantically. She was still in her dress and heels for the party, the red one she’d gone shopping with Jane to buy. It didn’t have any pockets. She was out of places to look._

  
_She didn’t have her purse, and she didn’t have her keys._

  
_“Better get her sedated and then you can fill out her information,” the guy in the lab coat said as he approached. Across the room she watched as a man in nothing but a pair of spandex shorts was hooked up to a bundle of wires and lowered into a glass case filled with some kind of golden gel._

  
_“No, please, don’t. Don’t put me in the box! You can’t-“ her words were cut off as she felt a pinch against her neck and everything started to get fuzzy. “No… box…” she tried again, but her tongue felt like dead leaves in her mouth._

  
_“…get her stripped down…” was the last thing she heard before she heard nothing else._

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> If you have questions, or just want to chat I'm over on tumblr here: http://bulmavegotaku.tumblr.com/ so feel free to stop by and leave me an ask or a message. 
> 
> And, as always, you guys are the best!


	14. Bucky Also Gets a Clue

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Bucky's reaction to Darcy's reaction

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> okay, so I realized I should have posted this chapter with the one last week. As an apology, there will be two chapters today.  
> Plus, this one is super short, so... yeah

This time, when Bucky heard Darcy scream, the fear in her voice was so clear, so obvious, that he wondered how he could have mistaken her earlier scream for anything even close to this.

  
He cut Steve off mid tirade with a sharp. “Sorry, Steve, I have to go.”

  
He hung up the phone, nearly cracking the screen as he ended the call. In an instant, he opened the bedroom door and was down the hallway. Dr. Foster was still standing there, a set of keys in her hand, and she looked so startled by his rush back into the room that he almost laughed.

  
He might have, except there’s nothing funny about the look on Darcy’s face.

  
She was staring at those keys, her eyes impossibly wide and the rest of her face twisted in fear. Her mouth was moving slightly, as if she was trying to form words, but couldn’t seem to get them out, and the edges of her shape had defiantly gone transparent.

  
He wanted to reach for her, to hold her and protect her from everything, but he knew that was impossible. He wanted to shout her name and get her attention so that he can tell her funny stories about Steve and Dum Dum and Gabe, but Dr. Foster is still standing there, looking at him like he’s lost his mind.

  
He must look like a total nutcase, staring at nothing, his face upset and twisted with fear and frustration.

  
He has to get rid of her. Now.

  
“Here’s your phone,” he said gruffly, shoving it at her. “Steve read me the riot act. I’m sorry for what I’ve done. I need to be alone now.” He knew his voice probably sounded brash and hollow, but he just can’t seem to care. Darcy was starting to really flicker and her eyes were moving as though she’s watching some horror play out before her.

  
He pushed the thin woman towards the door and yanked it open. He figured it was a good thing Steve fixed it yesterday when he stopped by. She’d probably be pissed to see it broken.

  
“Hey!” she shouted, but he got her moving, and she was out the door.

  
“I need to sleep. Come back tomorrow,” he practically shouted at her, knowing he must look totally insane. He slammed the door in her face then and flipped the deadbolt. It’s new, since Steve had to redo the door jam. So she shouldn’t be able to come back in.

  
He was vaguely aware of her knocking on the door behind him as he turned to Darcy. Luckily, she was still there. The look on her face, though… The blood in his face turned to ice.

  
“Darcy, doll, I need to breathe, Darce. Stay with me, okay? You’re freaking me out here,” he whispered, getting his face as close to hers as he dares. She was still staring at the same place as before, though, not even blinking at his words. It’s like he wasn’t even there.

  
Her lips were still moving and he tried to read them, though it’s difficult with her face twisted like that.

  
“What are you saying, Darcy, what is it? Breathe, doll, just breath.

  
“…Mal…”

  
She breathed and he caught part of a word.

  
“Mal what, Darcy?” he pleaded, she was almost completely faded by now and he felt like tearing his hair out. He was just so totally helpless. He extended his hands, knowing they would only pass through her, but needing to try anyway. “Mal, what, Darcy. Please, come back to me, Darce. Don’t go, sugar. Don’t leave me,” he whispered, frantic as he searched her face.

  
“Malick!” She gasped and her eyes jumped to his face, her form suddenly as solid as it’s ever been. She stared at him, her entire body trembling.

  
“Darcy?” Bucky's voice was shaking. He was afraid to speak to loudly and scare her again.

  
“It told Malick to put me in the box,” Darcy whispered.

  
With that, she was gone.


	15. Jane Confronts a Super Soldier Assassin

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Jane is having none of Bucky's bull.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Chapters 14 and 15 today, so if you didn't read 14 yet go do that first

Jane had stopped pounding on the door when she heard what she thought were voices coming from the other side. With her ear pressed to the cool surface, however, she could only hear the sound of a low, masculine voice that was too quiet to make out any words.

  
After a moment of silence she thought she heard the word Darcy, another pause and then a loud, “Fuck!” right before the sound of someone punching a wall. She jerked back, startled and started pounding again.

  
“What the hell is happening in there?” Jane yelled, her fist growing sore as she hammered away. “You better let me in! I’m not going away until you tell me what’s going on!”

  
A door farther down the hallway opened and someone stuck their head out to yell, “Shut the fuck up, lady, its 3:30 in the fucking morning!”

  
She ignored them, and kept at it.

  
“I’m gonna call the fucking cops, bitch!” they added, anger oozing from every hissed syllable.

  
“Hey, fuck you, buddy,” she yelled, and then her fist was coming down on air as the door swung open and she was yanked inside. Jane immediately began looking around, peeking into the kitchen and then marching down to check the bathroom and bedroom as well.

  
“What are you looking for?” the guy asked, looking and sounding beyond frustrated and weary.

  
“Is someone else here?” she demanded coming back to stand right in front of him. "Who were you talking to just now?"

  
“No, it’s just me,” he sighed, sounding infinitely sad about that fact and she noticed the lank hair falling in his face as he shook his head, and the pale cast to his skin, marred by dark circles under his eyes. "I was just talking to myself."

  
She suddenly felt bad for the guy, noticing the way his shoulders hunched over and his hands twitched at his side. For the first time since she’d charged off to check the alert she’d received about activity on Darcy’s bank account, Jane paused to consider her actions.

  
She’d rushed over her without thinking or considering that she might be running into a dangerous situation. She was lucky that the guy had bothered to ask questions before opening fire when she’d barged right on in. It was true she hadn’t known he’d be here but now that she did, she was starting to question the wisdom of antagonizing a known killer and former Hydra assassin.

  
She was just so worried about Darcy. Every time she got a call from the FBI with an update on her case, or thought she had a new lead worth investigating, she got her hopes up, and every single time it had come to nothing. Every time it was a little longer before she heard anything else and she was just so desperate!

  
Jane blamed herself for Darcy’s disappearance. How could she not? Darcy came to New York because of her. She was put on Hydra’s radar because of her.

  
After the first time Darcy had been taken, Jane had almost sent the girl away, except that Thor had persuaded her to bring them here where they were under the watchful of the Avengers and could be more easily protected. He’d argued that it was Darcy’s choice if she wanted to follow or not and when she had, well, Jane had been selfishly grateful. She loved Darcy, and relied on her for a lot of little things. Darcy was her friend. She’d thought they were safe enough here, working in the tower when they weren’t out touring the world, with their security detail and their panic buttons.

  
It hadn’t been enough, though.

  
So much time had passed; Jane was really struggling to hang on to hope.

  
And then there was this guy! He’d taken over Darcy’s space, moving in and using her iTunes account. Jane just wanted to be furious and scream at him that he had no right, that he was intruding where he didn’t belong, but she just- she just couldn’t.

  
She liked to think it was partly due to the fact that her survival instinct was kicking in and stopping her from pissing off the deadly super soldier, but she had a sneaking suspicion that it was actually because he looked so dejected and just a little pathetic.

  
She didn’t like that he was here, and she certainly didn’t trust him- that story about just “finding Darcy’s login and password just lying around” was total bullshit. Darcy was the computer savvy once. She always used to yell at Jane when she’d leave her password on a post-it-note on her monitor. Just the fact that he had been a part of Hydra, and Jane was pretty sure it was Hydra who’d taken her friend, made her want to shake him and demand he tell her where her friend was, but that seemed a bit unfair, even to her.

  
Still, he looked like he hadn’t slept in weeks, and she knew that he’d had a very rough couple of months, without even bringing up the fact that he was actually a 90-something year old POW that had been kidnapped and brainwashed and probably tortured and made to do all those horrible things…

  
Damn it, now she sort of wanted to pat him on the head and make him hot chocolate, though that was usually Darcy’s kind of thing.

  
He watched her watch him as her mind jumped from one thought to the next.

  
Jane was confused and didn’t know what to do.

  
She hated being confused and not knowing what to do.

  
She’d dedicated her life to figuring out things that no one else understood and making sense of the universe around her because she liked knowing things and knowing what to do.

  
Steve obviously trusted this guy, and Jane pretty much trusted Steve, but something was very off about him.

  
He was clearly unstable and disturbed, but he hadn’t done anything to hurt her, or even threaten her, if you discounted the gun he’d held when she first arrived, which she probably should, but he’d never actually pointed it at her. She couldn’t really blame him for being ready to protect himself, given everything.

  
He could have killed her and probably disposed of her body by now if he wanted to, and he sort of had cause to. He was clearly hiding out here and she posed a legitimate threat to his safety now. He didn’t know whether or not she would keep his secret. She didn’t even know that.

  
It all sort of depended on one thing.

  
“Do you know anything about my friend Darcy’s disappearance?” she blurted.

  
His eyes went wide with shock. Apparently, he hadn’t expected that to come out of her mouth. Good. If she could keep him off base, she might get some real answers.

  
“What?!” he sputtered and she had the impression that he was stalling for time to think of an answer. Yeah, he was definitely hiding something. Darcy always said Jane had traded in her people smarts for science smarts, but Jane wasn’t a complete idiot.

  
She tried a different approach.

  
“You were with Hydra, right?”

  
He nodded, and looked away. “Not for a couple of years, but yeah, I was with them for a while. Not by choice,” he added, a bit defensively. “And I didn’t take your friend.”

  
“Well, did you see or hear anything about her? Or do you know anything about what might have happened to someone that Hydra kidnapped? You don’t get together to gossip or trade news with your old Hydra buddies or anything like that?” She tried, grasping for anything.

  
He just shook his head sadly. “Six months ago I was camping near Lago Puyehue in Chilean Patagonia. I was doing my best to avoid Hydra, trust me. I don’t know where your friend is. If I did, I would tell you.”

  
Jane was at least 80% sure he was being 100% honest.

  
“Shit,” she said, head bowing and shoulders falling. “I’m sorry, I’m sorry, I’m just so scared for her. She’s been gone so long!”

  
“I get it,” he said quietly. “Steve told me a little about her and what happened. I wish-” he paused and looked away. “I wish there was something I could do to help her. I’ve been living her for almost three days now and I’ve sort of, been trying to- to get a feel for her, or something,” he said, fumbling for words. “I guess maybe that’s why I used her account. I was listening to her music and trying to feel a connection or- I don’t know. Sounds stupid now.”

  
Jane almost reached out to take his hand, but manages to hold back. “It’s not stupid. Darcy loved music. She probably wouldn’t care that you were using her account, in fact she’d probably force you to sit down and listen to a ton of her favorite songs- you know, if she were here.”

  
“She sounds great,” he said.

  
“She wa- is,” Jane corrected at the last second.

  
They sort of wince/smile at each other and Jane decided she wasn’t going to kick him out, or tell on him, though she would be keeping an eye on him.

  
“You can stay here. I won’t rat you out.”

  
He nodded in thanks. “I appreciate that.”

  
“Just don’t hack anymore of her accounts, okay?”

  
He nodded again. “Deal.”


	16. Bucky Ducky Doo, Where Are You?

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Bucky begins looking into the clues left by Darcy about her disappearance and makes a plan.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Okay, so there is a ton of Agents of SHIELD spoilers and potential spoilers in this chapter. I say potential spoilers because, once again, I have made an educated guess about what might happen on the show for the second half of the 3rd season. I kept things as vague and non-specific as I could, but there are a few things that I speculate specifically, that might happen that seem plausible. So, read at your own risk? Eh, I'm sure it'll be fine. 
> 
> And yes. Yes, that was a Scooby Doo pun. I can't help it, people. It's genetic. I blame my dad.

After Jane leaves, finally, Bucky notices that he has 8 missed calls and 4 text messages from Steve.

  
**What’s going on, Bucky?**

  
**Why aren’t you answering your phone?**

  
**Are you in trouble?**

  
**I’m on my way**

  
That last one was time stamped 8 minutes earlier. “Shit,” he cursed and dialed his worry-wart friend.

  
“Bucky!” Steve practically yelled into the receiver. “What the hell happened to you!?”

  
“I’m fine, Steve, it was just Jane. She was freaking me out, and I just panicked. I had to get her out of here before I lost it and did something stupid,” Bucky said, speaking fast.

“It’s okay though, we talked, now everything’s good. She’s fine. I’m fine. You don’t need to fly off the hinges.”

  
“What the hell, Buck! I thought something bad had happened. You scared the shit outta me!”

  
“I’m sorry, Steve, I’m so, so sorry. It was just a 90lb ball of fury and suspicion. I’m afraid I didn’t handle all that very well, at first. I haven’t been sleeping so good, punk and I just- I just needed a second to breathe.” He felt a twinge of guilt at playing on his friend’s sympathies, but he didn’t think Steve could handle the truth.

  
“Shit, and I probably wasn’t helping with your stress, chewing you out like that.”

  
Bucky waited till he heard Steve sigh. “Yeah, well, I’m sorry about that, too. Don’t know what I was thinking. Guess I was just bored,” he said, getting more that a little tired with lying about it and hoping that would be the end of it.

  
“Alright, Bucky, just- just get some sleep, okay? I’ll call you tomorrow and we can talk about it.”

  
Great, Bucky thought sarcastically and rolled his eyes. Into the phone he said, “That’s probably for the best. Good night, Stevie.”

  
“Night, Bucky.”

  
As soon as he hung up, Bucky jumped onto his laptop. He was pretty sure he had a clue now for finding Darcy and he didn’t want to waste any more time before looking for answers.

  
“It told Malick to put me in the box,” he whispered, remembering her last words to him. An involuntary shiver ran down Bucky’s back and he closed his eyes, trying to block out the memory of the look on her face.

  
She’d been so scared. His heart squeezed in his chest and he felt a bit sick to his stomach. The name Malick was tickling something in the back of his brain, and he put it into the search bar of his internet browser. He figured he could try a basic search before attempting to dig deeper and risk setting off any cyber alerts. He had promised the punk he’d try to stay out of trouble, after all.

  
Fortunately, putting ‘Malick Hydra’ in the engine turned out a tsunami of results and he found what he was looking for, and figured out why the name seemed familiar, pretty quickly.

  
Gideon Malick had been an advisor to President Ellis and one of the hands behind the formation of the Advanced Threat Containment Unit who had recently been ousted as a member of Hydra and had brought the whole ATCU under investigation for the last couple months.

  
Apparently, the new S.H.E.I.L.D organization had laid evidence against the fact that Malick was attempting to gather an army of enhanced individuals. Under the guise of putting Terrigen infected individuals into some kind of stasis containment to await a cure, he had moved dozens of the containment units to an unauthorized off sight facility where he was using Hydra conditioning and brainwashing techniques to control the individuals.

  
Could that be what happened to Darcy? Was the box she’d spoken of one of those stasis units? That might explain her abduction and incorporeal appearance both. Even if she wasn’t taken because of Terrigen infection, it was possible that Malick had used such a method for holding someone of interest to Hydra captive.

  
He still had so many questions, but at least he had a place to start looking.

  
He really wished she’d hurry up and reappear already. Then he could talk to her about what had happened to her, and tell her about what he thought he’d figured out. Then, they could make a plan from there.

  
He never had been good at sitting by and waiting, doing nothing. His body and mind were screaming for something to do, so Bucky did some more research, looking into Malick’s past, known associates and everything else he could find about the man and where he might have sent Darcy. He also looked into the ATCU, the organization, what had been released about the investigation so far, and everything he could find on physical locations.

  
He read all about the connection between the ATCU and a place called Endotex Labs where the cure was supposed to be being researched and where the infected individuals were transitioned into stasis pods.

  
That facility was located just north of Washington, D.C., in Gaithersburg, MD. Using all the skills he’d learned over his many years, both as an asset of Hydra and as a soldier in the U.S. Army, he went to work, studying the layout, familiarizing himself with the security measures, and working up a strategy for infiltration.

  
The internet really was a beautiful thing. He didn’t even have to hack into that many government run servers to find all the things he was looking for.

  
After nearly 10 hours of study and planning, and a few hastily thrown together meals, Bucky knew he was as ready as he could be without actually leaving the apartment.

  
Now, he’s just have to wait for Darcy. He was anxious to get going, to start looking for clues, and was more than a bit anxious waiting for her return. He decided to lie down and try to sleep. If the pattern held he probably had a few more hours before she resurfaced. He could use the rest and he knew she’d wake him when (if) she came back.

  
Shutting his eyes he tried to keep his mind quiet and not focus on all the horrible possibilities of what was happening to Darcy. He desperately hoped there wouldn’t be nightmares, but, of course, there were.

  
He napped restlessly for 2 hours, then got up and tried to burn some of his nervous energy by doing push-ups, sit-ups, and a few other exercises. After that he showered, and then cooked dinner. He tried to work slowly, spreading each activity out so that it would take as long as possible and burn more minutes.

  
He forced himself to eat, though he had started to feel slightly nauseous from his worry. He tried reading. He tried watching some of Darcy’s movies to occupy his mind. He went over all his plans again, scrutinizing every detail.

  
He even had a grueling conversation with Steve, when his friend called to check up on him. It was a challenge, but he kept his voice level and said all the right things, giving Rogers everything Bucky thought he wanted to hear.

  
Eventually, he gave into his pent up frustration and just paced up and down the hallway and living room, keeping his focus on the place that Darcy always seemed to be drawn to.

  
He considered leaving, but he wanted to be there when she reappeared. He wanted her input on everything he’d discovered. By 9 PM, though, he was just about ready to put his face through a wall.

  
Bucky decided he’d give her till midnight. That would put the clock at over 20 hours since she’d vanished. That gave her twice as long as last time. If she wasn’t back by then, well, he wouldn’t risk waiting any longer. With Malick taken out of play by S.H.I.E.L.D. who knew what had happened to her. She could be sitting in some federal evidence lock up somewhere, or be out in the world but under Hydra’s control. He had no way of knowing.

  
He might have waited longer, but he had a 4 hour drive ahead of him and he didn’t want to be trying to break into Endotex labs, which was under Federal Investigation, in broad daylight on a Tuesday morning.

  
At 12:01 AM, the Winter Soldier left the apartment, his clothing dark and unremarkable, except for the fact that it concealed several of his favorite weapons and a few pieces of technical equipment he’d managed to hang onto over the years.

  
Under the cover of the darkness he stole a car- a Honda Civic that was old enough not to have any anti-theft gear that was beyond his skills and that had a full tank of gas and an EZPass sticker in the window for the tolls.

  
He drove as fast as he dared, not wanting to get pulled over, but knowing he was racing a clock. He could only hope his actions would go without notice, and that he’d be back before Steve even noticed he’d been gone. Hopefully, with one Darcy Lewis, in tow.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So, I also added a slow burn tag because I was beginning to worry that people might need the heads up. A lot of you have mentioned how you are ready for the hugging and comforting to begin, which is good. That means I'm doing my job with this story, but I'm concerned that some of you might not realize how long a road these two have ahead of them. Assuming this has a happily ever after ending, which I am not able to promise. So... *ducks* don't hate me?!


	17. Steve Gets A Phone Call

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Steve and Tony follow Bucky

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Two chapters again today! Happy Valentine's/Galentine's/Single's Awareness Day everyone!

For the second time in as many days, Steve Rogers's phone went off in the middle of the night. His faster than average reflexes had him awake and answering the phone before Tony Iommi finished his guitar riff and Ozzy started to sing about losing his mind and going blind.

"Tony?" He asked, his voice sounding pretty steady for, he checked the clock on his night stand, 12:07 AM. 

"Hey, Cap, Do you know what your bestest bestie is doing right at this moment?" Stark's voice was both chipper and ominous- a tricky combination to pull off. 

Steve sighed. "I suppose it's too much to hope that he's at home, asleep in bed. You know, like I was."

"You are correct! About the too much to ask part, not the home in bed part. No, your frosty comrade is currently merging onto the Belt Parkway in a stolen Civic and heading west. I'm guessing this little field trip is unsanctioned by that chest-clenching growly noise you’re making right now."

"What the hell is he doing?!" Steve cursed to himself as he rolled out of bed and began fishing around for clothes and shoes. "Have you got eyes on him?"

"In a manner of speaking. My people sitting on that place out in Forrest Hills lost him after he jacked the car, but I've got FRIDAY hacked into traffic control and she's tracing the vehicle and calculating out possible locations till we can crash his getaway. You know I hate to say I told you so... And by hate I mean it's totally my favorite thing so-"

Steve cut him off. "He's not running, Tony."

The quality of Tony's voice changed as he suited up and his voice started being filtered through the suit's head piece. "Uh, River, Egypt, Rogers. Ringing any bells?"

"I know what it must look like, Stark, but I know Bucky, I know how much getting his name cleared means to him, okay? He isn't just going to get cold feet and run off. If he's gone off grid now it's for a very important reason." He had real pants and a t-shirt on, and he added a leather jacket and ball cap before lacing up his boots and heading for the door. 

"So, you just want to let him go? Wait till after he's completely disappeared off the grid again, or worse, gone all terminator on some imaginary/flashback target and killed another few hundred people? Jesus, Rogers, what's it going to take for you to get into that serum enhanced skull of yours? Your friend is gone and what's left-"

"What's left is still worth saving, Tony. And no, I'm not saying we just let him go. I'm saying we follow him, watch him. Once we see where he's headed then we make the call on if he needs us to step in and stop him. He's not some ticking time bomb, okay? Has he had a tough time adjusting? Sure, but haven't we all?" The captain asked pointedly and he heard Tony huff as some of his anger evaporated. "I just don't want to jump to the wrong conclusion and make things worse by causing a scene if we don't have to. There's a good chance this is all a misunderstanding." 

Steve knew he sounded confident and sure, but inside, part of him was hoping he wouldn't have to eat his words. He just prayed he was right.

"I'll grab Natasha and we'll meet up with you in one of the jets. You can still sent coordinates to the nav-computers, can't you?" Steve asked, as he stopped and knocked on Romanov's door.

"Who do you think you are talking to here?" Tony scoffed, and then cursed. 

"What? What is it?" Steve asked, his voice a bit frantic and his heart-rate accelerating. 

"I've lost him. Shit. FRIDAY, any idea where he might have turned off?" Tony asked his AI as he began doing his multi-tasking thing. 

Natasha's door opened and the red head stood there looking expectantly at him.

"Barnes is on the move. I need a pilot. You in?" Captain Roger's asked, holding his cell away from his mouth to speak to her.

She nodded. "Give me five minutes?"

"You've got three," Steve said and turned to jog to the hanger. In his ear, Tony was still working with FRIDAY to find Bucky's trail. “Any luck?” he asked into the phone as he made his way down the hallway.

“Uh, well, yes and no. He was last spotted getting onto 278, but there’s a lot of construction going on and the traffic cams are spotty at best. FRIDAY, the brilliant bitch has calculated given his current path, heading south and west, and his time of departure that there’s a 70 something percent chance his destination is within a 300 mile radius. So what do you think, Cap? Your old pal get a craving for some Philly Cheese-steak? Or is he gonna try his luck in Atlantic City? Course there’s always D.C. which is FRIDAY’s bet. Then again, he might know he’s being followed and he’s just trying to throw us off, so we can probably put Boston and half of Pennsylvania on the list of possibilities. We can always hope Barnes just decided to get some Amish made furniture for his new pad, right?”

Steve was doing his best to filter through Tony’s inane way of chattering on and on, and pick out the pertinent information as he grabbed the go-bag with his back up tactical suit in side from the locker room.

“Keep an eye on the traffic cams, okay Tony? In the meantime you want North or South?” He asked, pressing his thumb to the scanner on the door of the hanger bay. The door clicked open and he heard Tony gasp in mock surprise.

“You mean I get to choose?! Usually you just start doling out orders and we’re expected to fall in line. What’s changed?” Tony teased, but Steve knew that there was always an edge of truth to Stark’s snark.

“Well, you aren’t a member of my team anymore, Tony. Besides, I’m trying to be more aware of potentially emotionally compromising situations.” Steve was wry and just a tiny bit self-recriminating as he waited for the hatch on the nearest jet to lower. Besides, he could brandish his own edge of truth if he needed to. “You wanna help me call the shots on this one, I’m open to suggestions.” 

“Be still my shrapnel scarred heart,” Tony replied with every ounce of his Tony-ness. 

Steve rolled his eyes. “All in the name of compromise, of course.” He worked at storing his gear and then getting the jet powered on.

He heard Iron Man’s own wry chuckle. “Of course. Who says you can’t teach old dog’s new tricks? Okay then, I say you and the Widow start winging towards Bean Town, I’m gonna do a fly by on Philly, maybe get myself one of those Cheese-steaks, then I’ll make my way towards D.C. I see anything, I’ll call you.”

“Don’t be a stranger,” Steve said and hung up his phone, just as Natasha came dashing up the ramp behind him.

“Tony thinks Barnes is running?” she asked as she tossed her own bag into a compartment and slid into the pilot seat.

“He’s not,” Steve said resolutely, unable to help himself.

“Didn’t say he was,” Natasha replied in her usually blasé way. “Where we going?”

“North for now,” the Captain said, sitting in the co-pilot seat next to her. “Tony’s gonna cover Philadelphia and DC while we check out Boston.”

“That’s a lot of ground to cover. I thought Tony was tracking him.” The engines whirled to life while Steve did his best to ignore her raised eyebrow. 

“He was. He is. We’ll find him.”

“Any thoughts on what he’s up to?” Nat inquired casually.

“I’m not sure. He’s been acting sort of… distracted the last few days. I figured he was just anxious and bored sitting tight while I dealt with this whole mess, but it could be-” he paused, frowning.

“Could be what?” she prodded when he didn’t continue on his own.

Steve shrugged. It wasn’t that he didn’t trust Natasha with information about Bucky and where he was staying, but… “I think he’s been digging into Dr. Foster’s Intern and her disappearance. He seemed abnormally interested in what happened to her.”

“You think he might know something about her kidnapping? I know Foster always expected Hydra.”

Steve wasn’t really surprised that she knew more about the case then she probably should. That was just her way. “I wish I knew,” he whispered as she prepared the jet for takeoff.

Two hours later, Tony called. He’d spotted Barnes at a traffic cam on the Delaware/Maryland Boarder on I-95. Natasha turned the plane around and headed south west at top speed.

“Keep an eye on him, Stark, but don’t interfere unless you have to, okay? I’m not sure how he’ll react to seeing you alone. You should wait for us.”

“I’ll do my best, Rogers, but if I see him pulling up to the pentagon or scheduling a tour of the white house-” he started, and Steve was shaking his head and Natasha was rolling her eyes.

“Just stay on him, and we’ll be there as soon as we can,” Steve said.

“Sure, sure, no problem,” Stark insisted. 

A little over an hour later, Bucky had disappeared again.


	18. Bucky Breaks In

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Bucky follows the bread crumbs.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Chapter's 17 and 18 were posted today, so make sure you read 17 first! Enjoy!

It only took Bucky about 15 minutes to get inside the ATCU building and down to the basement where he figured they would be hiding any secret laboratories or hidden archives. That was partly due to the fact that the security wasn’t as high as he expected it to be. Most of the investigators were accountants and auditors, with less than stellar overnight guardsmen on duty. Or maybe they were the top of the line. He realized his perceptions of other people’s (normal people’s) skills might be slightly skewed.

  
The other part of his easy time breaking in was due to the fact that his electronic hacking hardware is Hydra tech, and the facility is using more of the same. He got through card readers and electronic locks as if he had an actual set of keys.

  
That was a good sign for him, not so good for anyone else.

  
He knew his way around Hydra based security protocols, and in no time he was sitting at a computer in a lab that was slightly harder to break into than the rest, and he was using all his Hydra imbued computer skills to log in and begin his data search.

  
He found the files on people interned by the ATCU’s enhanced individual containment program less than 5 minutes later. When he scanned the list he didn’t see the name Darcy Lewis, but he figured that meant less than nothing. He started flipping through the pictures.

  
Some were pictures taken from the DMV database, or mug shots from those that have been in the system. There are a few, though, that were apparently taken on sight. In those ones, the people all looked terrified or stunned. Some of them even appeared unconscious.

  
Darcy was one of those.

  
Her skin was pale and her hair was spread out around her head where she laid on some kind of metal table or slab. She was near the bottom of the list under the name Jane Geisel.

  
Bucky reads over her file quickly, but carefully.

  
Her ability was listed as Unknown. Her location was officially listed as the storage facility annex of Endotex labs, Gaithersburg, MD.

  
His heart jumps, until he reads the addendum at the bottom added by the Federal Investigators.

  
_Subject Geisel, Jane, ID number 00247-M is a false identity. Her picture and finger prints were not matched in any law enforcement database or facial recognition database. The subject appears to be one of the pods removed unofficially from the facility by Mr. Malick which has yet to be located. Information about this pod has not been forthcoming from any of the individuals under investigation for being in collaboration with Malick, and it was not at any of the other known residences or facilities known to be owned and or/operated by Mr. Malick and his associates._

  
It went on to list the primary investigator in charge of identifying and locating 00247-M, as well as any associates of Malick that they suspected of being part of the removal and storage team. He carefully studied that list until he found a name that looked familiar.

  
Carson Bradagon is listed on the original ATCU intake form as the lead Agent in her apprehension and as her case handler for the ATCU.

  
Getting the information he needs on Bradagon takes a few more minutes. Lucky for Bucky, Bradagon made bail and is under house arrest. He also lives in Rockville, MD, which was only about 15 minutes away.

  
He memorized the address and was reaching for a thumb drive to download all the files about Darcy Lewis/Jane Geisel when he heard voices in the hallway outside.  
They were familiar voices.

  
“How positive are you that this is where Bucky went?” Steve asked, walking down the hallway with someone whose tread was decidedly less quiet than his.

  
“Pretty positive. I ran a search for persons, places, and things associated with Hydra in the vicinity of where we lost him and this was the most significant one. Plus, you know, his getaway car was parked just around the corner. Makes sense that this is his destination, right?” The owner of that voice carried his typical careless arrogance, and it made Bucky want to grind his teeth.

  
How had Steve and Stark found him so quickly, he wondered, before deciding that one or both of them must have been having him watched. He really should have considered that. He’d been careless in his desperation to act.

  
He couldn’t let them catch him now. He had business with Bradagon that Bucky was sure would earn him Steve’s disapproving face, and he didn’t think Darcy had enough time for him to wait for another chance. Especially if he was being watched by his friend, as well as Stark. They would been keeping an even tighter leash around his neck once he was caught.

  
In the hallway the conversation continued.

  
“There’s no sign of intrusion or forced entry,” Steve added dubiously.

  
“Of course there wouldn’t be,” a female voice added, and the hackles on Bucky’s neck went up. The Black Widow was here as well. “Not if the Winter Soldier has gone into Stealth Mode.”

  
“Stealth Mode, that good, Nat,” Tony chuckled. “He also maybe just knows where they hid the spare key. This being Hydra’s place an all.”

  
“Bucky isn’t Hydra anymore,” Steve growled and it sounded like something he was sick of having to repeat.

  
“Hey, all I’m saying is that just because he forgot your patriotic mug when he switched sides the first time doesn’t mean he forgot everything about Hydra the second time he switched sides,” Stark argued.

  
Bucky logged out of the computer and set it to shut down. Then he began searching for an air vent while they continued to bicker.

  
Just as he finished replacing the grate behind him, he heard the Widow snap at both the men.

  
“Quiet. We need to split up and find Barnes before he spooks,” she chided with a harsh whisper. They had moved off a ways down the hall, but his enhanced senses were still able to discern them in the quite of the nearly empty building.

  
He smiled smugly as he made his way, as silently as possible, through the ventilation system to the outside. Seeing the unguarded quin-jet on the lawn of the facility gave him pause. His vehicle was compromised. It was only a matter of time before the three of them caught up to him. He was good, but he wasn’t going to bet his success that he was better than Captain America, Iron Man, and the Black Widow working together. They were already hot on his trail. He needed away to get enough of a head start.

  
“Steve is going to be so pissed,” he whispered as he sprinted for the jet. He just prayed his friend would be able to find it in him to forgive him. Again.


	19. Tony Plays Fetch

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Tony, Steve, and Natasha's reactions to Bucky's actions.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry it's so short, but there is an up side here. See the end notes for a short survey.

“Sir,” the feminine voice with the faint Irish lilt said into Stark’s ear, “I thought you would want to know that Captain Rogers and Miss Romanov have both been alerted to a breach on their transportation's defenses.”

  
“Connect me into their coms,” he ordered, knowing that was the fastest way to communicate with the other two.

  
“-like Stark was right after all,” Natasha was growling at Steve.

  
“Music to my ears,” Stark cut in over Steve’s reply. “What’s going on?”

  
“One of the alarms on the quin-jet just went off,” Nat said, her tone cheerfully informative. Tony winced. Natasha Romanov was never cheerfully informative. He realized how pissed off she must be right now, not just at Barnes, but at their overly trusting Captain. He was mostly just grateful her ire wasn’t directed at him. This time.

  
“He’s stealing your ride?” Tony gaped, unable to help himself. “But that’s totally a thing friends do when they’re totally not going rouge, right? This is just a big misunderstanding, I’m sure. Was the old Buckster much of a prankster? Maybe he’s just getting back in the swing of things.” As he exited the building, though, he found Steve and Natasha looking at the quin-jet still parked exactly where they’d left it.

  
“Shut up, Tony,” Natasha growled, a pistol in her hand and her game face on.

  
For once in his life, Tony listened, and he watched, his repulsers on and ready while Cap and the Widow crept up on the silent aircraft.

  
“Stay here,” Steve whispered. “Back us up?”

  
Tony nodded as Natasha activated the ramp release from her wristband computer and then tensed to watch it open slowly. She and the Captain went aboard, Steve returning a moment later to wave Tony over before approaching the far side of the jet.

  
When he rounded the back of the ship, he noticed right away that there were signs of tampering. One of the outer panels was pried open and there were wires and cables sticking out where he was sure there shouldn’t be.

  
“Nat says he took the fuel injection regulator. I don’t suppose you could jury rig us something to get us in the air?” Steve said, gazing helplessly into the mess inside the open panel.

  
“Oh, sure, given complete access to an AutoZone and about 3 hours, I could probably come up with something safe enough to work,” Tony said, his face place sliding up to expose his face. “I’d be faster for me just to fly back to the Avenger’s base and pick up a spare, though.”

  
“Okay, I’ll call ahead, let them know you’re coming,” Steve said, dourly.

  
Tony sighed. “Okay, boss, I’ll be back in little over an hour, probably. You want me to keep looking over the footage, have FRIDAY see if she can spot him?” he asked as he slid his face plate back down.

  
Rogers shrugged. “You could try, but he knows were on him now. We probably won’t find a thing unless he wants us to.”

  
He looked so beaten down and tired that even Tony couldn’t help but feel a little bad for the guy. He was probably having flashback about the last time he’d been trying to hunt Barnes down. The man had known just how to stop their pursuit in its tracks.

  
“Hey, Cap, chin up. It could be worse. He could have blown the jet up, or set some kind of wicked booby trap for you. He obviously didn’t want to hurt us, just get away.” He gave the tall blond a pat on the shoulder as he walked far enough away from the jet to take off.

  
“Sure, I just wish I knew what he was after. I’m going to take Natasha and see if we can figure out what he came here for,” he said, putting his “in charge” face back on and getting ready to get to work.

  
“Stay out of trouble. I’ll be back in a flash,” Tony threw over his shoulder as he leapt into the air.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Okay, so I ran the numbers, did the math, and from what I can tell, if I want to have this all posted by the time Agent's of Shield comes back on March 8th I have to pick up the pace a tiny bit. So, here's the options. I can post one new chapter every day until then with the occasional double day here and there if needed. Or I can post two chapters every other day, with the occasional three days in a row if needed. Let me know. I have to start posting tomorrow if you want them every day. Keep in mind, a lot of the chapters from here on out are much longer than they've been. 
> 
> And, as always, thanks for all the comments and kudos! I don't always have time to reply to them, but I do read them and count them and they make me so happy inside. You guys are the best!


	20. Bucky Gets Answers

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Bucky takes the next step in his search for our favorite Intern. Or maybe its more accurate to say the Winter Soldier takes some steps...

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Okay, so the votes are in. It looks like the majority of people voted for everyday updates, so here we go! Thanks so much for your input, and also for the concern. You guys are all super nice and accommodating. That said, those of you worried about me stressing myself out of this can lay your fears to rest. At least for now. I haven't completely finished, but we're good for another 32,000 words or so. I've only got about 6 chapters left to write, maybe seven, and I have a few weeks to do it, so hopefully no stress. I usually work better under a little bit of pressure anyway. Still, all your kindness and patience and support is much appreciated. 
> 
> I'm super excited for this chapter guys! Enjoy!
> 
> WARNINGS: Some violence and threats of violence and torture. Also MAJOR spoilers for Agents of SHIELD, both actual and potential. Speculations range from general to fairly specific here.

After pulling the fuel injection regulator from the quin-jet and hiding it away, he had climbed the fence and made his way out of the industrial district until he found a public bus heading the right direction. The bus would take a little longer then driving by car, but his last ride was obviously known to Stark and he didn’t want to risk stealing another one to drive only a dozen miles or so.

  
He exited the bus when it reached Rockville and walked the rest of the way to Bradagon’s house. The sky was just turning the pink-grey of predawn when he arrived. Bucky spotted a suspicious vehicle parked in front of the house, 2 shadows sitting inside, and figured it was better safe than sorry. It was easy enough to evade detection by approaching from the neighbor’s yard at the back of the house.

  
He picked the lock on the sliding glass door on the deck and entered silently. He could hear the muffled sound of someone snoring down the hallway, so he took time to gather a few things in the kitchen and garage before approaching the master bedroom.

  
He’d done a quick check to assure himself that the rest of the house was empty, and now he felt ready to make his move. The Soldier stepped inside the bedroom where the man slept and stood over his bed. Carson Bradagon was a physically fit man in his late thirties with light brown hair that was slightly thinning and bad skin.

  
He slapped as strip of duct tape down of the sleeping man’s mouth and then pinned his arms down before he was awake enough to really struggle. Bradagon thrashed and fought beneath him, his eyes wide and hi voice making muffled screams.

  
The Asset leaned down close to his face and hissed at him to be silent.

  
After another token attempt to free himself, the man went still. His eyes were narrowed in anger now, and watching him carefully.

  
He moved quickly, forcing the man onto his stomach and securing his wrists together with some sturdy zip ties. When he rolled Bradagon back over, the man was grunting and his stifled speech sounded like it was probably heavy with curses and insults.

  
When Bucky was confident that his prisoner’s arms were secured he lifted him with a hand circling his arm and forced him to stumble into the bathroom. He shoved Bradagon into his bathtub and shut the door behind him. As an interior room, he could turn the lights on without being discerned by the law enforcement officers outside.

  
The man in the tub struggled to sit up, his eyes squinting against the light for a moment, but when they were adjusted enough for him to clearly see who stood over him he froze, his eyes going wide again and his eyebrows shooting towards his receding hairline.

  
Putting on his best Winter Soldier scowl and straightening his back, he did his best to appear intimidating and menacing.

  
It was pretty effective.

  
“You know who I am,” he growled quietly. It wasn’t a question.

  
Bradagon nodded and then went back to trying to sit up so that he wasn’t lying awkwardly on his bound hands. That done, he studied the Soldier, his brow breaking out in sweat as he waited to find out what Hydra’s scariest Boogeyman was doing in his bathroom.

  
“This can go two ways,” The Winter Soldier announced finally. “The easy way is me taking that tape off your mouth and you telling me everything you know about Gideon Malick and what he was doing with the people he had tucked away in those stasis pods. The hard way is I can remove your foot so that your ankle bracelet comes off nice and easy, and we can take a ride to a more secure location and then I can torture you until you tell me everything you know about Gideon Malick and stasis pods.”

  
Bradagon glanced at the little black box with its blinking green light attached to his ankle. Then his eyes darted to the bathroom door and Bucky knew he was thinking about the police sitting thirty yards away.

  
“Hard way it is,” the Asset tisked and pulled a 10” knife out of his pocket sheath and ripped down the plastic shower curtain to make clean up easier.

  
Bradagon slid back and shook his head, protesting as loud as he could behind the tape.

  
Winter tilted his head. “No?”

  
The terrified man continued to shake his head, his eyes on the gleaming blade. “You want to try the easy way?”

  
The man nodded, looking back up at Bucky’s face for the first time since he’d pulled the knife.

  
“The quietly answer my questions way?” he growled, making sure there were no misunderstandings.

  
When he nodded again, very emphatically, the Soldier set the knife down on the bathroom counter, within easy reach and then lifted a finger, giving a very threatening warning before reaching over to rip the tape off, poised to render the man silent again should it prove necessary.

  
“Fuck that hurts,” Bradagon hissed as he twisted his jaw this way and that trying to ease the stinging burn on his skin.

  
Winter gave him a second and then scowled meaningfully. “Malick,” he said, prompting the guy to start talking.

  
“Sure, man, what the hell. Malick’s gone anyway and Hydra’s circling the fucking drain. Besides, it’s not like I’m sharing secrets with the enemy, right? All you had to do was ask,” the guy started rambling, his voice forced and his smile sour and false.

  
The Soldier narrowed his eyes and growled quietly.

  
“Okay, okay, so I worked for Malick at the ATCU, which I’m guessing you already knew. He was using us to collect powered people. People affected with that alien mutagen. Anytime anyone showed signs of transforming, or exhibited strange abilities, we march in and scoop them up, take them to the lab up north and the techs would sedate them and put them under with that stasis tech Hydra developed over the last few years.

  
“The official line was that they were keeping those people safe from themselves and keeping them from hurting others until they could come up with a cure. Course there was never going to be any cure. Malick had the doctors putting that shit into these vitamin supplements that he was handing out like candy. There was…” his voice trailed off as he swallowed hard and shifted his shoulders uncomfortably, grunting in pain.

  
“There was what?” the asset encouraged as ominously as possible.

  
“There was this plan, right? Malick was one of the heads of Hydra, one of the Legacies,” he answered, and his tone put capitals on the word. “His family has been with Hydra for centuries, and he was always going on and on about the true purpose of Hydra, which I always just thought was world domination and global control, shit like that, but apparently there was a long held secret that only the higher ups even knew about. Seems like that’s always the way it goes, right?

  
“Anyway, a long time ago, like a few millennia back or something like that when those alien fucks first showed up and started messing around with our DNA they created this ultimate Inhuman. Only the guy was too fucking powerful, and they couldn’t kill him or control him, so they banished him off through some portal. Malick and the upper Hydra heads were always working to get the planet ready for this guy to return, working to get him to come back, you see.”

  
“Bullshit,” Winter declared venomously.

  
“That’s what I thought, too, man, but they actually did it. They brought the guy back through the portal with the help of some of those people over at S.H.E.I.L.D. and he was one scary motherfucker, too. Scarier then you, even.”

  
Bucky scoffed, but let the guy keep talking. He wasn’t displaying any of the signs of deceit. It was clear he believed what he was saying, even if it was probably propaganda and scare tactics used by Hydra leaders to keep their grunts in line.

  
“So, yeah, the first few dozen people Malick had us steal from the lab at Endotex where sent out to some castle in England where they were putting the portal together. Then S.H.I.E.L.D. showed up to get their people back and they almost screwed everything up. In the confusion this bad ass motherfucker they had locked up got loose and killed all the other people in stasis. Malick was pissed, but then his long lost god showed up so I guess he figured it wasn’t a total loss.”

  
“They were all killed?” he asked, his voice tense with restrained despair.

  
“The first batch, yeah, but Malick had only had us move some of the most powerful freaks to England. Once they got back to the state, the new guy, Ward or Maveth, or whatever the hell he was calling himself that day started having more and more of them moved to one of Malick’s Hydra facilities. They started pulling the people out, waking them up, and forcing them through compliance conditioning, and getting them ready to be part of his army of enhanced freaks or some shit.

  
“Where was the facility?” the assassin asked, his hopes rising again.

  
“Virginia, about 200 miles from here. We loaded a bunch of those fucking boxes onto trucks and they took them away, but that isn’t going to do you any good,” the guy added and Asset found his scowl deepening again.

  
“Explain,” he commanded and the guy sighed heavily before continuing.

  
“That was one of the places that S.H.I.E.L.D went first when they showed up to take out Malick and his creepy zombie god. All the people with powers there were either killed or rescued. All that information was handed over to the Federal Investigative teams once they had enough evidence to shut Malick down and get his government ties severed. Either S.H.I.E.L.D. scooped them up or they all volunteered to be moved to a secure government facility pending the investigation. Then all that shit that went down with the Sokovian Accords. With everyone all up in arms about the U.N. bombing and the scandal over what to do with powered people still up in the air, I guess most people let themselves be put away for their own safety.”

  
Bucky frowned. If Darcy had been rescued by S.H.I.E.L.D. and turned over to the government then why hadn’t she come home? Even if she really was powered and had turned herself over to the government, then why didn’t they know anything about her real identity or have record of her location?

  
“What if the person I’m looking for wasn’t rescued in Virginia?” he asked, not wanting to give too much away if he didn’t have to.

  
The guy frowned at that. “Everyone else was left at the warehouse up at Endotex Labs,” the guy said, sounding confused. “Same goes for them, either they went with S.H.I.E.L.D. or they turned themselves in.”

  
“No, this girl wasn’t like the rest. I don’t think she even had powers. You had her listed as Jane Geisel, but that wasn’t her real name. You were listed as her case handler and the apprehending agent, but she wouldn’t have been taken the normal way. Whatever Hydra wanted with her it might not have been about her being enhanced.” The Soldier watched the guys face as he spoke. At first he only exhibited signs of confusion, but after he said the name a light bulb went on behind the guy’s eyes. “You know who I’m talking about.”

  
Again, it wasn’t a question.

  
“Yeah, man, but… well… shit.”

  
“What?” he demanded, leaning closer. The guy looked really afraid now, his whole body shaking. Bucky reached over and gripped him by the shirt to lift him “Tell me.”

  
“Okay, man, fuck, I’ll tell you. Just remember, I’m only the messenger, okay? And I’ve been nothing but cooperative and told you everything you wanted to know, okay?”

  
“Just fucking tell me,” he snarled, feeling his heart start to pound and his fist clench almost unconsciously. He let go of the guy, letting him fall back into the tub where he was slumped uncomfortably and wincing at the rough treatment.

  
“Alright, so, Malick’s new friend, the scary ancient motherfucker was sort of paranoid, right? He got stranded on that planet where he’d been for like over a 1000 years or some shit and he really, really didn’t want to get sent away like that and trapped ever again. Plus, he figured it was only a matter of time before the controlled the entire world and since the guy was all about planning ahead, he was interested in finding out about other planets, or worlds, or dimensions that he might be able to conquer. He was a real fucking trip, let me tell you.”

  
The Solider made an impatient motion with his left hand and they guy flinched before speaking again.

  
“Malick was helping him round up as many people who had experience or knowledge of portals, or wormholes, or any of that interplanetary travel shit. One of the targets was this astrophysicist chick and her assistant. I think there was another PHD guy that they were supposed to grab too, but they screwed up. The guys sent to grab your girl, the assistant, ended up taking her early. She was home when they thought she was supposed to be out, something like that.

  
“Well, when she didn’t show up where she was supposed to go, her doctor friends got spooked and called in the big guns. They were hanging with the Avengers or something and when they didn’t leave, we couldn’t grab them like we planned. So Malick and his friend ended up with their little piece of leverage with no one to use it on, so they had us take her and stick her in one of the boxes for safe keeping.”

  
“Where’d she end up?” he finally asked, his patience waning.

  
The guy swallowed hard. “Well, at first they had her sent to one of Malick’s private vaults, one of the places he liked to stash artifacts and valuables- Hydra assets and the like. But when S.H.I.E.L.D. took down Malick all of his possessions not confiscated by them were divided up amongst the other heads, part of the Inheritance Protocol.”

  
Now they were getting somewhere. “Inheritance Protocol?” Bucky was passing familiar with the Inheritance Protocol. He’d been passed down from handler to handler that way over the years. “Who inherited Malick’s portion?”

  
“Well, normally I wouldn’t have any idea, but it just so happens that one of my buddies was one of the agents assigned to oversee Malick’s estate in the event that something happened to him. He asked for my help when he went to get everything ready to ship,” Bradagon said, obviously stalling.

  
“Give me the name,” he ordered, leaning over and getting in the guy’s face again.

  
That turned out to be a bit of a mistake. Bradagon head-butted him and then kicked him, knocking Bucky back and cracking his skull against the mirror that shattered behind him. Everything in his head flashed white for a moment, and when he could see again, Bradagon was on his feet and stumbling for the door.

  
The Winter Soldier tackled him and they both went flying through the flimsy wood, splinters flying and crashing down onto the floor around them as they tussled and wrestled for control. It wasn’t much of a fight. Not really.

  
Bradagon was still bound and Bucky was still a serum enhanced super soldier, but it was brutal and noisy and the Asset knew he was out of time. He gripped the guy by the hair and pressed his face into the carpet, rubbing it viciously against the course fibers. “Who!?” he all but shouted, his other hand twisting the guys shoulders into an intensely painful configuration. “Who got her? Where is she?”

  
To his disbelief the guy started laughing. “She’s dead, you frozen fuck,” he spit, laughing cruelly as they heard the front door burst open and the officers announce themselves. “You fucking killed her yourself, you metal-armed motherfucker, you fucking traitor!”

  
Bucky felt as though the air had all been knocked from his lungs. “What!?” he shouted, lifting Bradagon high enough off the floor to shake him. “What are you talking about!?”

  
“Freeze!”

  
“Put your hands up!” came from the doorway and Winter knew he was out of time. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry for the cliffhanger, but I'll see you all tomorrow!


	21. Steve Gets More Phone Calls

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Steve and Natasha finally manage to get a lead.

Tony’s been gone almost 45 minutes when Steve’s phone rings again. He and Natasha were going through the lab’s internal servers, but without knowing what they’re looking for it’s just a whole lot of information that means almost nothing to them.

  
Natasha was attempting to explain the connection between Endotex and the ATCU and Hydra to Steve when the call came in.

  
“Tony?” he asked, wondering if something had gone wrong at the base. He’d talked to Sam and told him to get the part ready for Tony when he arrived so there wouldn’t be any problems.

  
“Yeah, Cap, I’m on my way back with your spare part, but I just got a ping from FRIDAY. I’ve been having her monitor the police bands in your area, just in case we got lucky, and I think we maybe just hit the jackpot,” Tony said, his voice echoing strangely from the external sound dampeners that kicked in when he flew at top speed.

  
“What’d she find?” he inquired, motioning to Nat and putting the phone on speaker.

  
“Apparently there’s a suspected Hydra flunky, one of the guys under investigation with the whole ATCU things who’s under house arrest nearby and the officer’s assigned to watch his house just reported signs of a disturbance. Could be your guy,” Tony croons, and Steve imagined he looked like a puppy who just successfully performed a trick and is not so patiently waiting for his treat.

  
“Let’s hope so,” Steve replied. “Send me the address and we’ll meet you there.”

  
He hung up and a few seconds later his phone text alert sounded. “Did we grab one of the jets with a bike? Or are we going to have to borrow another car?” Steve asked her wryly.

  
“Oh, we’ve got a bike. I’m driving,” she announced and he followed her out without arguing.

  
10 minutes later they pulled up in front of a small house at the same time as the first ambulance pulled up, lights running and siren blaring. There were several Montgomery Sheriff's Department vehicles parked out front, their lights flashing brightly along with the first rays of sunrise.

  
“What’s the situation?” Steve demanded in his most Captain America voice as he climbed off the back of the bike and hurried over to where two cops were leaning against their car, speaking to a third man who was seated in the passenger seat, cradling his right hand.

  
He isn’t in uniform, so it takes the cops a second to figure out who he is, and then they frown. One of them telling the other to radio in and let them know they had Captain America on site before he turned to him to answer.

  
“One perp, male, early to mid-thirties, 6”, showed up here about 20 or 30 minutes ago as far as we can tell. He attacked and restrained the owner, one Carson Bradagon before beginning some kind of interrogation. It looks like there was a struggle with the owner which alerted my guys out here. They went in to investigate and he disarmed them, restrained them, then continued to beat on Mr. Bradagon. There was still shouting and screaming when we got here, but apparently he took off about 5 minutes ago. My guys were able to come out then. I’ve got 3 units out chasing the guy and the Maryland State Police are getting roadblocks set up on the 270 while officers from Gaithersburg, Norbeck and North Bethesda set up checkpoints on all the other main roads,” the guy explained. His name tag read Collins.

  
“Thank you, Sheriff Collins. Did Bradagon say what the man wanted?” Cap asked, his heart pounding and his blood pumping.

  
Collins shook his head. “No, he’s in no condition to make a statement.” He waved to the front of the house where the recently arrived ambulance crew was rushing inside.

  
“I thought the guy was really gonna kill him,” the deputy sitting in the front seat added, standing up, his hand held protectively to his chest. “He kept asking the guy, ‘Where is she? Who has her?’, real cold like. At first Bradagon just laughed at him, but then-” the guy paused, swallowing hard as he looked like he might be sick. “He started punching the guy, but was unreal, he hit the guy SO hard. I’ve never seen anything like it, and Wallace and I, we could hear the guys bones breaking. When that didn’t seem to work, he went into the bathroom and got this big fucking knife and held it,” he gestured between his legs, not even able to say the words. “Bradagon started screaming then, so the guy hit him again.”

  
Another deputy, a woman whose tag read Wallace, had walked out of the house and drifted closer as her partner, McDougal, was speaking.

  
McDougal glanced over at her and then continued speaking. “When he finally answered the guy, his voice was pretty thrashed, but it sounded like he said ‘She went barren,’ something like that. There was more, but I didn’t catch it all.

  
Natasha who was standing next to Steve, silent and unobtrusive, scowled when Steve glanced down at her. “That make any sense to you?” he asked, more confused than ever and feeling more concern than ever for his friend.

  
Natasha shook her head, but then they were distracted by the paramedics exiting the house, a large, bruised and bloody man on the stretcher between them. It was pretty obvious the guy wasn’t going to be saying anything for a while. Steve could tell from where they stood that his jaw was broken, as well as his nose and there was blood on the front of his boxers and undershirt.

  
Everyone turned to watch as they loaded the man into the ambulance. One of the paramedics came over and informed the sheriff of which hospital they were taking Bradagon and that there was another ambulance on the way if the deputies needed it.

  
Collins glanced inquiringly at McDougal who just shook his head. “Think mine’s just a sprain, but Wallace-” he gestured at his partner, who just shook her head.

  
“Pretty sure my finger’s broken, but I don’t need an ambulance for that,” she said with a frown.

  
Collins nodded at her and then told the paramedic to have the other ambulance stand by for now. For when they found this guy. The medic left then, the ambulance driving off in a fairly anticlimactic plume of exhaust.

  
“This doesn’t seem like the kind of thing that needs Captain America’s attention, but I suppose with Bradagon’s alleged connection with Hydra that I shouldn’t be too surprised. You know who it is we’re dealing with?”

  
Steve resisted the urge to look at Natasha again. “We’re just following up on a break in over at Endotex labs. Since Bradagon worked there we thought there might be a connection, but I don’t think there’s anything I can tell you to help with your investigation.”

  
Collin’s grunted, displeased but not surprised. “Figures. Guess that’s how you got here so fast, huh?”

  
Steve nodded. “We’ll get out of your hair, Sheriff.” He considered asking the man to keep them in the loop, to let them know if they found Bucky, but he figured he’d save his breath.

  
“That’s it?” Collins asked, voice hot with irritation.

  
“We’ll keep you posted if we find anything we think you need to know,” Natasha added before walking over and getting back on the motorcycle and starting the engine.

  
“Fucking Avengers, my ass,” Collins muttered, but Steve still heard and felt his back go stiff. He hated leaving things like this, especially with things still being so tense with the recent conflict.

  
As the Captain was climbing onto the bike behind Natasha, Deputy Wallace walked over to them quickly.

  
“My partner was wrong,” she rushed to say, her arm coming up to wave back at McDougal and Collins, who were glaring at all three of them. “Bradagon didn’t say ‘She went barren,’ he said, ‘She went to the Baron.’ There was a name, too, but I couldn’t hear it.” She paused, then, considering whether or not to continue before adding. “Whatever that means, he looked totally destroyed by the news. I thought he might kill Bradagon then, but he just- he just left.”

  
Steve couldn’t help the pinch of his brow as he considered that.

  
The Baron.

  
Some part of his brain snapped onto those words and he nodded to the woman and thanked her as he tried to think.

  
The Baron…

  
Just then his phone rang, startling him from his thoughts.

  
The ID was an unknown number, 240 area code.

  
“Hello?” he answered cautiously.

  
“Steve?” Bucky’s voice asked, his tone blank.

  
“Where are you?!” Steve demands into the phone as he nods a goodbye to the deputy and she steps back and walks away.

  
“She’s dead, Steve. I killed her.”

  
Steve could feel his heart hammering in his throat. “Where are you?” he repeated and gripped his phone tight enough he might have worried about breaking it if he’d had room to think about anything but the blank despair in his friend’s voice.

  
“I’m so sorry, Steve. I’m- I need you to take me in, Steve.”

  
“Of course, I’ll come get you, just tell me where you are,” Steve insisted, trying to keep his voice level so as not to alarm the Sherriff or any of his people.

  
“I’ll meet you at the jet. I’m sorry, Steve. I won’t fight you.”

  
“Get us back to the jet,” Steve whispered to Natasha before saying, “We’ll be right there,” into the phone. “Just- just wait there. I’ll help you, Buck, whatever’s going on with you, I’ll help you. We’ll figure it out.”

  
“All ready figured it out, Steve. You were right. Should have stayed out of it,” he admitted, then the line went dead.

  
“Bucky?” Steve asked, then shoved his phone in his pocket and gripped Natasha around the waist.

  
“Go!” he shouted and she peeled out, speeding down the residential streets and then zipping north on 355, making it back to Endotex in record time.

  
When Natasha jerked to a stop, Steve was off in a heartbeat. He wasn’t surprised to see the ramp to the quin-jet down, and sprinted up it quickly, ignoring the shout from Natasha for him to wait.

  
“Bucky!?” he called, and then came to an abrupt stop when he spotted his friend kneeling with his hands on his head, a line of weapons laid on the floor, just out of his reach, and a lump of electronic tech that was probably the missing part from the plane. “Buck?” he asked and felt his heart break when Bucky just knelt there, not moving, barely breathing, his eyes locked onto the floor panel right in front of him.

  
Without another word, Steve stepped closer, dropping to his knees right before his friend and reaching out to him. “its okay, Bucky. Hey, look at me. It’s okay,” he whispered and was relieved when Bucky’s eyes finally lifted to meet his own.

  
“She’s dead, Steve,” he whispered, looking slightly shell shocked, haunted.

  
“Who’s dead, Bucky?” the Cap whispered, wanting to reach out and hug his friend, but not knowing how he might react.

  
“Darcy,” Bucky whispered and his voice cracking slightly as he said the name and Steve’s blood ran cold. “She’s gone. I didn’t know, Steve, I didn’t know, and I never got to-” His words cut off as his eye was drawn to something over Steve’s shoulder.

  
“This was about Darcy Lewis?” Natasha asked, and Steve turned to see her, gun in hand, though it was pointed just to the left of them. “You found out what happened to her?” Nat’s face was tight and unreadable.

  
Steve turned back in time to see Bucky nod. “Hydra took her, they were keeping her.” He winced and then lowered his hands, resting them in his lap. “I didn’t know she was there. I swear I didn’t,” he said, emotion creeping onto his face as he spoke, yearning for them to believe him. “She’s dead, and it’s because of me.” He finished and his face emptied as he raised his hands back over his head, moving slowly.

  
“Buck, you’re not- you aren’t making much sense. What happened to Miss Lewis?” Steve asked, reaching out to place a careful hand on his friend’s flesh and blood bicep and pull his hand back down again.

  
“We need to go,” Natasha said, cutting off anything his distraught friend might have added.

  
Once again, Steve’s phone went off, breaking the moment. Rock music blared from his phone for less than 4 seconds before he had it at his ear.

  
“Uh, Tony?”

  
“Uh, yeah! I’m here, getting major stink-eye from Sheriff Taylor and waiting for you. Where the hell are you guys?!”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Have some angst. Sorry, not sorry?


	22. Bucky Can’t Go Home Again

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> They go to the tower while Bucky tries to handle his feelings. Once there, there are words.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So... uh, this is more Bucky angst. Just be prepared.

While they waited for Tony, and Natasha replaced the part he'd removed, Bucky struggled to gather his thoughts and gain control of his emotions. He felt stunned and partly numb, but there were deep wells of feeling pushing up at his thoughts and he feared for when the dam would break.

Steve asked him to sit on one of the benches and strap himself in, which made Bucky feel more secure, and relieved that his friend was taking control of the situation. Steve scooped up all his weapons and placed them in a bag in one of the lockers nearby, then came and sat next to him.

They only had a few minutes before he heard Tony landing outside, his repulsers blazing and then dropping off as he hit the grass. His voice was muffled by the jet walls as he spent a few minutes talking with Natasha outside. 

Part of him was afraid of what the Widow would say about him, but most of him was too distracted by other thoughts to really care. 

"Once we get back to New York, we'll get this all figured out, okay?" Steve said with his hand on Bucky's shoulder. "I can have Natasha drop us off close to your apartment and then-" 

"NO!" Bucky said vehemently, cutting his friend off. "I can't go back there, Stevie. I can't-" He couldn't bear the thought of seeing Darcy right now. If she was there, her ghost or spirit or whatever, how could he possibly explain? "Please don't make me go back there," he asked, his fists clenched and his eyes on the floor. "You should lock me up anyway. Doesn't Stark have a dungeon in his tower? It's best if I'm kept somewhere safe."

"Bucky-" Steve started, and Bucky could tell his friend was going to argue the point if for no other reason than it had become his habit to do so, even if he could see in his friend’s eyes that his conviction was crumbling.

"At least one of you Frosted Flakes is finally speaking sense," Stark announced as he walked up the ramp and into the plane, Natasha behind him. "Though I'm not holding my breath that the trend will last. Apparently, you've been yammering non-stop gibberish since these two arrived. So what was it, an ad for Fruity Oaty Bars set you off, or was this something you've been planning, waiting for ol' Steve here to drop his guard and let you out of his sights again?"

"Tony-" Steve growled in warning.

Bucky could feel the simmering tension in the small space ratchet up. The fragile truce between the two men balanced on a knife’s edge.

"its okay, Steve. Mr. Stark is right not to trust me. I'm not a good person. I'm a killer, an assassin. You shouldn't put so much faith in me either," Bucky said, his head still bowed and his eyes down. He felt like the very shell of his being was cracked, frayed, and ready to burst at any second. He could feel the fragile control he'd gained since breaking free of Hydra ready to snap. He wasn't in danger of losing himself to their power again; he was just plain in danger of losing himself.

"Buck," Steve started, his voice strained and sounding so hopeless. 

"Don't, punk, just don't, okay. I just need to go somewhere I don't have to be worried I'm gonna hurt someone, okay? Just for a while, just until-" he stopped, considering his next words.

Until what? He got his head on straight? Until he forgot all about Darcy and what he'd done-what they'd done? Until he didn't feel like trying to keep himself together was like squeezing a fist full of glass shards?

"I need this. Please, Steve," He turned and looked his friend in the eye. "Please," he whispered and he could feel the helplessness threatening to spill from him.

Steve nodded and Bucky turned to look up at Stark. "You do have a place, right? Somewhere you can lock me a way?"

"Oh, sure, I've got a very special cell with your name on it, Barnes,” Tony laughed and shook his head as if he couldn’t believe what he was hearing. Then he turned walked out. “I’ll meet you guys on the roof of the tower. Everything should be ready by the time you get there. Just make sure you show up this time, huh?”

With that, he was gone.

Once Tony left, Natasha wasted no time getting them ready for take-off. Steve buckled himself into the seat next to Bucky and, though they don't touch, Bucky felt grounded by his presence. Since he was feeling so on edge, so close to crumbling, he'd take whatever comfort he can get.

By the time they were in the air, the silence between them was growing fraught with tension. Bucky knew his friend wanted to say something, probably felt a gut-clenching need to say something, and Bucky was glad that he had resisted the urge so far, (he knew Steve wanted him to explain, to talk about what he did and why he did it and how he felt about it and he just knew the second he started talking he wouldn't be able to hold himself together any longer), but the awkwardness between them wasn't exactly helping.

"I'll tell you, Steve, I will. I'll explain. I just need to get somewhere safe first, okay?" He said, his voice a whisper, and felt relieved when Steve nodded, patted his knee, and then leaned back, relaxing in his seat. 

Then, with the tiniest worm of guilt eating its way through his stomach, he began to try and figure out exactly what he was going to tell them all, how he was going to explain.

The whole truth is out of the question. He's already broken some unspoken line of trust with these people and he was still worried about them locking him up and throwing away the key. He's already in for a long hard recovery, and he doesn't need them adding delusional to his list of issues, especially since he isn't. 

He still doesn't understand why or how he can see and hear Darcy, so it's not like he could explain anyway. 

God- Darcy...

He felt another wave of grief swell up, tightening around his chest until he couldn't believe he was still drawing breath, that his heart is still managing to beat while it's so obviously being crushed by the incomprehensible depth of the loss that he feels.

It was a struggle for him not to gasp for breath, and he remembered the way little Stevie would curl in on himself, collapsing down into his smallest common denominators as he fought with his lungs, wheezing and panicked as his own body betrayed him. 

He had always been sympathetic to his friend's plight, but now he knew real empathy. It was probably the thing that was going to kill him, he figured, as he focusef on the steady flow of air in and out of his lungs, the beating of his heart and the pull of his muscles against his joints and bones.

A week ago, hell- an hour ago, he would have been able to get control of his feelings and his body with only marginal effort. Now, though-

Bucky knew he survived the last 75 years and everything he experienced with the war, and his fall, and his time as the Winter Soldier, and after he escaped Hydra because he was able to shut off certain parts of himself. 

He could kill, and killing was easy for him, not just because of his specific skill set, but because he had disconnected himself from the rest of the human race. He had become other, an asset, not a man, so that he couldn’t relate to other people. If he couldn't relate, he couldn't feel sympathy or empathy, couldn't feel the loss of any of the lives he took because they had no meaning for him, no intrinsic value whatsoever.

Sure, during the war, and even while working under Hydra, to some extent, he'd been working for a cause, for a greater good, or an ideal that had superseded any moral or ethical doubts he might have had. The thing was, even as a green young man, going through the motions and fighting for his country and the freedoms that it embodied had always felt like empty platitudes that he recited to himself like some kind of mantra in order to rationalize all the death and blood and inhumanity that he had to wade through to keep his head above water.

Still, rationalized or not, empty or not, it had kept him breathing over the stretch of decades without having to face up to the stark cruelty of his existence, of his own actions.

Fighting Steve and then recognizing him had been the first crack in the impossibly tall, thick wall he'd built up between his mind and his heart. He had been chiseling away at it for the last two years, little by little, hoping to bring it down without burying himself under the ruble, but then Darcy-

She had played a song for him, half laughing at, it half loving it, singing loudly as she danced around the room in her easy, carefree way, but it felt painfully apt now.

Darcy had been his wrecking ball, and now he was just as buried, just as drowning in his emotions as he'd always worried he might become.

Steve's hand on his shoulder brought him out of the self-pitying depth of his thoughts and he realized, to his amazement, that they had arrived. 

They stood, and he let Steve and Natasha lead him from the landing pad, inside, and into the elevator. A lilting feminine voice announced that Mr. Stark was waiting for them on level B7. The elevator ride took several minutes, and, when they reached the bottom, Steve and Natasha had to pass a three point security scan before the doors would even open.

The hallway that the doors opened onto was plain, scarce, and familiar to Bucky. Not familiar in the 'I've been here before' sense, but in the 'reminds me of home' sort of way. The colors were subdued, off white and medium grey, with no decorations or adornments. It looked, and felt, like a prison or some kind of military base. There never was much of a difference for Bucky.

They walked down the hall, Steve next to him, Natasha behind, while the voice from above gave them directions. A minute later they reached a set of doors. Tony was standing outside the one on the right, his Iron Man suit gone, replaced with a faded black t-shirt and blue jeans.

"Welcome home, Frosty," Tony said, waving them into the space. There was a small room, the walls and floor divided into small panels and then another set of doors. "This is sort of like an air lock. Only instead of keeping air in, we're keeping you in," He adds. "I've got all sorts of nasty surprises for you, if you try to break out."

"Is this really necessary, Tony?" Steve asked, scowling deeply.

"I told you, Steve, its fine. I'm not gonna try to get out, so it isn’t' going to matter," Bucky repeated with a sigh as he walked through the second set of doors into the larger room beyond. 

It was simply furnished with a bed and a table with three chairs, all bolted to the floor, but looking comfortable enough. There was even a television set into one wall and a small bookcase with a few paperback novels on it already. It was the stripped down, locked up version of Darcy's apartment, though he hoped it came without the specter of any previous tenants. 

He sat in the single chair that was opposite the other two and rested his arms on the table. Steve and Natasha took the seats across from him, while Tony leaned against the wall, his arms crossed and face mildly grumpy. The doors closed with a quiet ‘whomp’, indicating the space was probably air tight. Bucky could only begin to imagine the kids of precautions Stark had included in a cell meant to hold him.

"What? No thumbscrews?" Bucky asked humorlessly, a botched attempt at lightening the mood that he regretted as soon as it came out of his mouth. He could almost hear the funeral dirge playing in his head. 

Only Tony snorted, sounding more surprised than amused. "Old school," he grunted, the added, "We're a little more high tech around here- high frequency audio emitters, focused laser-beam ray-guns, truth serum and knockout gas, etc... But I might have a rack around her somewhere, if that'd make you feel more at home."

"That's enough, Tony!" The captain snapped and Tony winced. 

"Just trying to make our guest more comfortable," he pouted.

Steve rolled his eyes and leaned across the table to focus on Bucky. His face still held plenty of righteous fury. Steve’s specialty. "Alright, Buck, we're here. You're secured. You wanna tell me what was so important that you had to break your promise to lay low and sneak off?"

Bucky's wince was almost identical to Tony's.

"Technically, I didn't really break it. I mean, I promised to ‘try to stay out of trouble’, and I did. I did try, but-" he sighed and leaned back in his chair, his head suddenly tightening with an impending migraine. "None of that matters now. I thought someone needed my help, but it turns out I was already too late."

His friend's face grew even more disapproving. "On the jet you promised to explain."

"I know," Bucky sighed again, resigned. "All right." He shifted in his chair, getting as comfortable as possible. "The other night, after Dr. Foster left the apartment, after I talked to you, I received some information about a possible suspect behind the disappearance of Darcy Lewis."

"Received from where? From who?" The Widow asked, speaking up for the first time since they'd arrived at the tower.

"I can't tell you that," Bucky hedged. 

"Why not?" Stark asked.

"Can't? Or won't?" Romanov said, at almost the same time.

Bucky felt his frustration level tick up in his chest. This wasn't going to be an easy discussion. If it was just Steve, that would be one thing. Even Stark probably wouldn't be all that hard to talk his way around, but the Black Widow- He certainly had his work cut out for him.

"Fine. Won't. Let's just go with 'It's Classified,' and leave it at that." 

"Not good enough, Barnes," Romanov insisted, leaning back in her chair and folding her arms over her chest. "Try again."

"Look, I'm not going to tell you my source, so forget it. It isn't pertinent to this discussion, and you probably wouldn't believe me anyway, so drop it." He made the effort to put enough steel into his voice to be convincing. 

All three of the other people in the room had tensed up and narrowed their eyes at him, but their suspicion would be less damning then the truth. He hoped. 

"Fine," Steve said, breaking the tension. "You received this anonymous tip. What was it?"

He nodded gratefully to Steve before continuing. "A name. Malick."

The Widow's eyebrows went up a tick. "Gideon Malick?"

Bucky nodded. "The name was vaguely familiar to me, so I did some digging."

"Digging how?" Stark asked.

"Google," Bucky said, rolling his eyes. "It wasn't hard to find information on him. The guy has been in the news a lot the last month or two."

Stark looked a bit sheepish and shrugged. 

"That's why you went to Endotex," Steve added, and it wasn't a question.

"Right," he confirmed. "My informant had indicated there was a chance Malick had used one of the ATCU's stasis pods to hold Miss Lewis. I found out about Endotex and decided it was worth checking out."

"What did you find?" Romanov probed. 

"I found out that he had. She'd been taken there and filed under a false name. She was listed as Jane Geisel." Steve grunted and Romanov raised an eyebrow at that. "I know, I guess someone in Hydra thinks they have a sense of humor."

"What? Why? Why's that funny?" Tony asked, perking up. Apparently, he hated being the only guy in the room who didn't get something. That made sense. Howard had been the same way.

"Geisel is German for hostage," Steve explained and Tony snorted again. "Wait, so if Miss Lewis was processed at the ATCU, why wasn't she located when S.H.E.I.L.D. exposed Malick and had the ATCU shut down and put under investigation?" the captain wondered.

"The file at Endotex had her listed as location unknown. Malick had her moved and the investigative team hadn't had the location of the particular vault where she'd been sent. I got a name from her file though, the guy that was listed as apprehending agent and case handler."

"Bradagon," Steve whispered and shrugged when Natasha shot him a glare. There was a reason the Howling Commando's never let Steve handle any of their P.O.W. interrogations.

"Bradagon was the one that told me what happened to her after Malick was taken down by S.H.I.E.L.D.," Bucky admitted and his hands tightened into fists. "See, when one of the heads of Hydra gets cut off, there's a list of people responsible for enacting the Inheritance Protocol. It's how they pull off that 'two heads take its place' bullshit."

"Did Bradagon tell you who inherited Darcy?" Romanov asked, her face shutting down, giving nothing away.

"He did," Bucky admitted, swallowing hard around the lump in his throat. "Apparently, Malick was part of an elite sect of Hydra who's members have ties going back hundreds of years, hell, maybe more. He was a legacy, so when he was removed from power, his possessions were sent to another head, another legacy, another member with family ties going back generations."

He saw the moment when the Widow caught on, her body going rigid, though her face stayed that perfect blank mask.

Steve glanced between them, waiting for someone to speak.

"Someone want to share with the class?" Stark asked, obviously annoyed and lacking Cap's patience.

Bucky fought down a sneer, closing his eyes to keep the emotion that must be pouring out hidden as he answered.

"Baron Zemo."

Steve gasped, and Stark hissed.

"So that means..." Steve began and then stopped, his face going tight and his teeth clenching shut.

"Yeah," Bucky said, knowing just about how his friend was feeling at that moment. His left fist was squeezing tight enough to have the mechanics complaining. "She was sent to his castle in Germany less than a week before we blew the whole fucking place to Kingdom Come."


	23. Darcy Faces Her Fears

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> We return to our daring heroine and her frustrating plight.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This chapter is a little lighter, guys. Hope you like!

Darcy was really fucking exhausted.

She stood in her living room, looking around in a daze for several minutes, wondering just what the hell she was supposed to be doing, feeling dizzy and out of sorts, like she was forgetting something important, but unable to focus enough to recall...

"I need a nap," she huffed and turned to March down the hallway to her bedroom. What had she been doing? She couldn't even remember the week long science bender that must have left her too tired to even remember the science bender.

She reached her room, and lay out on the bed, only to realize something was off. She noticed the blankets then, the missing comforter and foam pad.

"What the hell?" She asked, confused and disoriented. Darcy hopped off the bed and stepped back to look around her room. Nothing else seemed to be missing, though when she stepped around the bottom of the bed she noticed the shoe box she kept in the closet, the one full of stuff she intended to put into a scrapbook if she ever decided to take up the hobby of scrap booking, was on the floor, open and spilling onto the carpet.

She knelt down next to it and reached out to gather the items up and put them back into the box, but then her fingers passes right through the photos she'd taken in New Mexico and she knew.

She remembered everything, and she had to work very hard to keep her breathing and heart-rate from skyrocketing.

She was so tired, she just wanted to rest, and the last thing she needed right now was to panic and pop off into where ever it was she popped off to when she wasn't here. She very deliberately did not think about the creepy fucker who'd had her put into some kind of suspended animation box, and she very, very deliberately did not thing about how scared she'd been when they'd stretched her out, naked, on that metal table and started putting needles into her skin.

Instead, she tried to think about Bucky. Bucky, who had laughed at her less than perfect singing voice and ridiculous white-girl dance moves and who'd taught her how to sit down when she'd kept falling through the furniture, and Bucky, who's charming smirk was totally contagious and who's grumpy cat face was totally adorable, and who's muscles were totally exactly where they should be and as big as she liked, and who had finally agreed to help her after getting over his stubborn refusal to see sense.

"Bucky?!" She called out and went to find him.

He wasn't in the bathroom.

He wasn't in the living room.

He wasn't in the kitchen.

Bucky wasn't there.

"Fuck!" She cursed and wished she could kick something. "How long was I gone?" She wondered aloud and had to stop to take some deep breaths, working to make herself calm down.

She checked around for a note, or any sign as to where he'd gone, but she found none. Of course, it didn't help that she couldn't actually touch anything, or move it around. She did spot a gun case still tucked under her bed, though, so she figured he hadn't left permanently. He seemed like the kind of guy that liked having his weapons close.

Darcy figured he'd probably just gone out for groceries or something. It could have been a while since she'd vanished, and maybe he just got sick of waiting for her to come back.

It was fine. Everything was fine. He'd be back soon and then she could tell him what she'd remembered and then they could figure this all out together.

The light outside the window said it was morning and the clock on the microwave said 8:42, so she figured it was AM. She'd probably been gone just over 24 hours. Maybe? She certainly hoped it hadn't been longer than that.

She waited.

It was boring as fuck. Without Bucky there to work the remote, she couldn't turn the TV on. She couldn't pull a book off the shelf, let alone turn the pages, and his laptop lay closed and quite on her bedroom desk.

  
Darcy lay on the couch and tried not to think about Bucky. She failed spectacularly.

It was a real challenge to remain calm and Zen-like while she was imagining all the worst possible reasons for him to not be there. She suddenly had a greater appreciation for Dr. Banner, whom she'd met a few times in the labs, while working with Jane. He had mostly kept to himself, or worked with Tony Stark, whom she had also met, though the shy Biochemist/Nuclear Physicist hadn’t been around for a while.

She thought Dr. B had seemed both relaxed and uptight at the same time. A strange combination sure, but she kind of wished she could get some pointers from him for keeping her cool while in impossibly frustrating situations.

She thought Tony Stark was both hilarious and irritating- also a unique blend. She sort of wanted to be him when she grew up.

Darcy wondered if any of the other important people she'd met through her connection to Jane and Thor had noticed her disappearance. It wasn't like they actually really knew her. Mr. Stark probably didn't even remember her name, and she and Jane were traveling so much with all the Science! stuff Jane was involved with lately, but still...

She remembered Jane confronting Bucky and her heart warmed and broke at the same time, recalling her friend’s loyalty and concern.  
  
There was the sound of the key turning in the lock, and Darcy sat bolt upright, causing her focus to slip and her body to fall through the couch. She jumped up, her torso appearing out of the back of it in a way that made her dizzy, just as the door swung open and Captain America walked in.

She made the distinction, not because of his outfit, which were just plain clothes, but because of his expression. It was a hard, jaw-clenching, professional face if she'd ever seen one.

That did not bode well.

He shut the door and then stood looking around, his face still blank, but his eyes filled up with an infinite sadness that made her break into a metaphorical sweat.

"Shit," she whispered, and he shook himself and began moving down the hall. She followed him to the bedroom where he retrieved a large black duffle bag from the closet and began loading thing into it. All the clothes from the dresser went in, Bucky's clothes, followed by a scarily comprehensive collection of guns, knives, and something that looked like a garrote. The laptop followed, as well as a few other electronic pieces that she couldn't identify that had been tucked into the back of the linen closet in the hallway.

The last thing the Cap grabbed was the shaving kit in the bathroom, zipped closed and tucked into the pocket on the end of the duffle.

"What the hell, Rogers? Where are you taking all of Bucky's stuff? Did something happen to him? Jesus fuck this sucks!" Darcy cursed as she followed him around the place, all but wringing her hands with worry.

After everything was collected, Steve stood once more, the bag slung over his shoulder and looked around one last time. He fiddled with the spare set of keys in his hand, Bucky’s keys. She knew because she'd made him show them to her, to prove he hadn't stolen them. Not good.

"Sorry, Miss Lewis," Steve whispered, his head bowed, and Darcy's heart jumped in her chest.

Did he know she was here? Had Bucky told him about her? Had they locked him up, was that where he was?

She wanted so badly to ask a million questions, but there wasn't any time or anyway to make herself heard, what with Bucky gone. Steve was turning and opening the door, shutting and locking it behind him and she was out of options.

She dashed through the door and chased him down the hallway, pausing only after he'd turned the corner on his way to the elevator. The hallway loomed ominously and she had to swallow down the panic that threatened to choke her.

Her eyes watched the Captain’s backside as he made his way to the end where the lift was and tried to calm herself.

She remembered what had happened her in this hallway, and what had happened afterwards. Her panic attacks had to have been triggered by some kind of unconscious association, but since that had all moved to her conscious mind, she should be able to control it, right?

She'd gotten a solid D in her Psych 101 class, mostly because she'd taken it her first semester of college and she'd still been under the false impression that because they didn't take roll in class she wasn't really required to be there. Personal freedom may have gone to her head a bit her freshman year and she had missed a lot of class.

The fact of the matter was that Steve was about to leave, and if he got away from her, she might never see Bucky again. Hell, she might never see anyone again. She had no choice.

She could do this. She was Darcy Fucking Lewis.

A ding from the end of the hallway announced the arrival of the elevator and she watched the doors open and admit the captain, her determination and desperation squashing the worst of her fear. Mostly.

Darcy closed her eyes and ran.

She opened them just in time to see the doors closing right in her face. She tumbled through them and stopped herself before she could fall through the back of the small box. Her chest was heaving as she steadied herself, standing next to the looming Captain Rogers and fanning herself.

Not because she was too hot, she couldn’t' really feel anything now that she was on the elevator and safe with the patriotic hero, but out of habit. Running always made her feel out of breath and overheated. Plus, she was standing next to Captain Fucking America.

"That was a close one, Cap," she said, sort of glad for a second that he couldn't see her. Or hear her. "And I'd just like to say, for the record, that I should probably thank that ass of yours for helping me get through my difficult time. I mean, watching you walk away is a fantastic distraction, as distractions go, and would bolster any male-attracted person’s spirits. Also, congrats on your face, man. You've really got a whole thing going there," she said, waving up and down at his impressive physique.

The elevator arrived on the ground floor, the doors opened, and they got out. She followed him out the front doors and onto the busy street outside, the noises and sights of the city familiar and calming as they walked down the sidewalk and around the corner.

For a second, she started to wonder how she was going to handle things if Steve had brought his motorcycle, but sighed in relief when he stopped and loaded the bag into the back of a black Corvette Stingray.

"Sweet ride, dude," she said, taking a moment to appreciate the car before centering herself, concentrating, and climbing into the passenger seat.

It was a tricky maneuver, going through the door while trying to sit on the seat, but she managed.

"That's right, bitches, I'm a total BAMF. Darcy Fucking Lewis, in the house. Or the car, as it were," she rambled to herself, her nerves presenting as they often did in a combination of verbal diarrhea and over confidence.

Steve slid into the driver's seat and she could swear she almost felt the vibrating rumble of engine as he turned the key and it roared to life.

"Alright, Cap, take me to Bucky."

She just really hoped there was still a Bucky to be taken to.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> We'll return to our regularly scheduled angst tomorrow.


	24. Bucky Breaks the Bad News

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Reunited at last.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Warnings for Civil War educated guesses, adult topics of discussion, and angst. All the angst, you guys. You've been warned.

"Oh thank Thor!"

Bucky heard the words only seconds before he heard the sounds of the outer door opening. He was fortunate he was lying on the bed, facing the wall, with his eyes closed. He was very aware that his features had tightened into a wince at the sound of that familiar voice.

When the inner door opened, Bucky schooled his features and sat up, turning to face his visitors.

Darcy stood in the center of the room, her dress and lips just as red and brilliant as ever, her eyes shifting between relief and concern rapidly and her hands twitching as if she wanted to reach out him.

He looked right at Steve who was standing there holding an armful of clothes and his shaving kit.

"Got all your stuff," Steve explained, setting it next to him on the bed after he turned to sit up. "Stark made me switch your straight razor out for an electric one, and all your weapons are locked away, but at least this way you can wash up and change clothes," Steve explained, grudgingly accepting the rigorous security measures.

"'Preciate it, Stevie," Bucky whispered and focused on his friend to give him an excuse not to look at the beautiful ghost that had somehow managed to find him, even here. He'd hoped he'd have more time to plan for this meeting, and, maybe it was a dick move, but part of him had hoped that maybe he would never have to face her, that maybe she would have moved on, or faded away or whatever it was that happens to people's spirits after they died.

Another part of him, a very small part, was sort of glad she was there, that she'd been worried about him and cared enough to follow Steve and come after him. He still felt the same draw to her that he had since the moment she had told him to call her Jiminy Cricket, hell, maybe since she first appeared in the living room of his apartment looking like some gussied up wet dream. Even if she was dead, she wasn't gone. She was still here with him and he couldn't really be upset about that.

He wondered which sentiment made him more of a selfish asshole.

"Natasha is going to get a hold of Coulson and his crew. She and Stark want to verify... everything, and then... Then I don't know. We'll get this whole thing figured out." Steve said, eyes steady on him as he spoke, voice low and soothing. "You should try to rest and take it easy for now."

Bucky nodded, eyes shifting to the floor in front of him where he could see the toes of Darcy's heels. He swallowed, harder then he would have expected and considered how to talk to her without everyone overhearing him. He was sure that there were cameras covering the room and the "airlock" chamber, and he was pretty sure that a good portion of the wall on his right was actually a cleverly disguised window or two-way mirror.

"You need anything else?" Steve asked when it became obvious that Bucky wasn't going to add anything to the conversation.

He shrugged and stood, "Not right now. Thanks anyway." He gathered a change of clothes and his kit. The bathroom was small, but functional, a small room off the main one, its door to the left of his bed. "They aren't going to watch me showering, are they? I mean, if they are I'll make sure to give them a show, but some privacy in the john is probably best for everyone." He tried to force a smug smirk to his face, but he knew it came off way more self-deprecating.

"I'll make sure of it, but I don't think even Tony would put camera's in the bathroom," Steve said with a frown that was less then convincing.

Bucky nodded, shot his buddy a lazy salute which he hoped would cover the nod he made to Darcy towards the bathroom and then walked over to it. "Thanks, punk."

"Sure. I'll be around. If you need anything, just call," Steve added, and then turned to go. "And hey, perk of staying in the tower- infinite hot water."

Bucky made himself chuckle. "Good to know."

Once he was inside the bathroom he waited till he heard the doors seal before turning on the water as high as it would go. He put the toilet seat down and sat.

"Jesus, Bucky, what the hell happened?" Darcy asked as she phased through the closed door. "I know you said you and Stark didn't exactly get along, but him locking you up here in his own personal Gitmo is pretty extreme. I mean, I'm super lucky I'm invisible and shit, ‘cause I'd have never gotten down here otherwise. Security’s tighter then my homophobic cousin Tommy's asshole. I mean, at least you’re okay, physically. I was sort of freaked out that maybe something bad had happened to you…"

Bucky rested his elbows on his knees and leaned toward, eyes on the floor and wished he could laugh at her colorful remarks. He put his face in his hands to cover his mouth, just in case there were cameras, and hoped the sound of the shower would cover his words.

"I asked him to lock me up, actually," he admitted, his words coming slowly as he watched her.

The little line between her eyebrows appeared as she scowled at him.

"What are you, nuts?! Why would you ask him to do that!?" Darcy demanded as she moved to stand right in front of him.

"'Cause this is where I belong, doll," he said with a sigh. “The kind of person I am, the kind of life I live- I’m not good for anything now except for killing people and ruining everything. Everything I do, even when I’m trying to help, I just make the world a darker, uglier place.”

“Bucky, no!” Darcy said, falling to her knees in front of him so that he was forced to look her in the face. “You can’t think like that. You were, like brainwashed and shit, sure, but you’re getting better, right? You have free will and you are the only one that can decide what kind of life you wanna live. Can you be a dick? Absolutely! But, hey, some of my favorite people are dicks. at least part of the time. That doesn’t make them any less valuable as people. I mean, sure, sometimes I want to throw things at them, or make them go very far away, but that doesn’t mean-“ She paused and ran her hands into hair, squeezing her locks at the root and growling in frustration. “I am not saying this right.”

She eventually pulled her fingers free of her now tousled hair. “You are more than just a killer or a war machine. You might not be able to see it, because all that has sort of been shoved in your face and maybe that’s all you’ve had to focus on for the last 70 odd years, but that isn’t all you can do. You don’t want to kill people or blow shit up, cool. Don’t kill people or blow shit up. Take up a hobby or get a job, go to school. I bet you’d make one hell of a history professor. Or just sue the military for back pay and retire to Florida or some shit. You could take up golf or making those little boats in a bottle or-“

“Darcy, just stop,” Bucky hissed, pressing the heels of his palms against his eyes. “You don’t know. You don’t know what I’ve done, what I want to do. I’m not just talking about while I was working under Hydra, either. This morning I almost killed a man just for giving me some epicly shitty news. I wanted to kill him. I could practically taste his terror and all I could think was, ‘I should cut his fucking heart,’ ‘cause it felt like that’s what he did to me. I hurt him, and I liked it. I wanted to hurt him more. Don’t you see? Me! I did that! That’s the kind of person I am.”

“Did you kill him?” she asked, her voice calm and soft, like he hadn’t just told her he wanted to get creative with his big ass knife.

Bucky moved his hands to the side and looked down at her. He was scowling so hard his head was starting to ache. “That’s not the point,” he growled, knowing why she was asking.

“That’s exactly the point. You have parts of you that scare the shit out of you? Parts of you that you don’t like? Hey, welcome to being a human fucking being. You think I like the part of myself that can’t say no to eating that extra bowl of ice cream? Or the part of me that wonders if maybe I shouldn’t just use my tits to marry some rich old dude so that I don’t have to work ever again, ‘cause I can be a lazy fucking bitch, let me tell you. Or the part of me that wonders if maybe I should try being a prostitute, cause I like sex so much, and hey, the extra money would be awesome to have, and you can bet your sweet ass I’d be a fucking awesome hooker. I can be kinky as hell, too. Bet I could make extra money from letting people tie me down, or calling some john daddy while I pretend to act like some innocent little girl.”

“Jesus, Darcy, stop!” He said, slamming his hand against the sink. Luckily, it was his right hand. “That doesn’t compare, at all. That’s not even in the same ball park as the shit that I-” he stopped, forcing himself to calm down as he reigned in his temper.

“Lucky for you, it’s not a competition. It’s just life. You don’t like something about yourself, you change it, or you just do your best to ignore the fact that that part of you exists, like everyone else,” she added, trying to break the tension with a little smile.

She knelt before him, her beautiful red lips pulled up, her blue eyes blowing brightly, her hair slightly messy and the open circle of her dress’s keyhole giving him a tantalizing view of cleavage. She was so gorgeous, so full of light and hope…

It slammed into his gut like a runaway train. He doubled over with guilt and loss, squeezing his eyes tight against the sight of her and waiting for his heart to decide if it was even worth beating on.

Apparently it was.

His heart was a fucking traitor.

“You don’t understand, doll,” he whispered, running his hands into his hair to grip at the roots, mirroring her actions from moments before. “You don’t know, and you aren’t going to feel the same after you do, believe me.

“You can’t say that,” she chided, and he could hear the pout in her voice. “Tell me then! Tell me what’s so fucking horrible, so I can prove you wrong.”

He shook his head, but didn’t look up or move as he started talking.

“Just before you disappeared last time, you kinda freaked out and said something, do you remember?” he asked quietly.

“Yeah, I had a memory about something that happened to me when I was taken,” she said and her voice sounded slightly strained.

“Yeah, well, you said a name. Malick. I looked him up, found out all about him. I figured out what you were talking about when you said they were gonna put you in a box, and where they probably did it. When you didn’t show up, I got worried, I thought maybe you were running out of time or something, what with you being gone for so long. So I drove down there.”

“You left the apartment?” her voice was shocked, and kind of proud. “But you promised Steve-”

“Yeah, well, I told you, I was never good at resisting a beautiful dame in trouble. I found the place, broke in and found a file on you. It listed you as location unknown, but I figured I was on the right track, so I got a name off the report, one of the guys who’d brought you in, figured he might know more.” He swallowed hard, willing himself to continue talking. “Turns out, he did.”

“That’s the guy that you wanted to kill? The guy that gave you the bad news?” she asked, and her voice sounded smaller, weaker, as if she had already figured out what he was gonna say. Hell, maybe she had. She was a pretty smart girl, her thinking him worth a damn aside.

“Yeah. The guys that took you got taken down by S.H.I.E.L.D., but Hydra had a system in play to get their stuff shipped off to the next person down the list. That included you in your box.”

“So, where’d they send me?” she asked, a thread of hope in her voice that felt like frozen needles under his skin.

“You remember I told you about how I helped the Avengers stop that Hydra asshole from spreading that nasty virus he’d stolen? How we had to blow up his whole fucking castle to keep the stuff from getting out and spreading?”

Bucky was proud at how not completely wrecked his voice sounded, but she didn’t answer him, and the question hung in the air between them.

He decided he owed it to her, at least, to look her in the eye.

She was staring blankly at him, her eyes only a little wide.

“Guess I know why I can see you when no one else can, doll. You’re haunting me. You’re haunting me because it’s my fucking fault that you’re dead.”

Bucky watched as her eyes started to fill up, as her lip began to quiver and her body began to shake. “I didn’t know, Darcy, I swear I didn’t know, and I wish I could take it back.” He wanted to reach out and hold her, give her the comfort she so desperately needed, so deserved. Little comfort he could be though, as the man who was responsible for her end.

“I- I’m-,” she tried, but the words were too awful to say.

“I’m so sorry,” he said, his hand coming up to reach for her cheek, but it passed right through.

And then she vanished, so it didn’t matter anyway.

Bucky bowed his head again and tried to cry, but his heart was too frozen to let the tears go, so he turned the shower to freezing cold and climbed in, surprised when he could fell the biting sharpness of the icy water on his skin. Glad he could feel anything at all. Glad when it hurt like hell.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I wish I could say it was going to get better now...


	25. Steve Makes a Call

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Steve, Natasha, and Tony dig deeper.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> You guys get a bit of a break for this chapter. There's much less angst. And some more clues about things. And stuff.

Steve knocked on the door of the office, though it was already mostly open.

“Steve, what can I do for you?” Maria Hill asked, shifting in her seat to wave him inside.

He stepped in and shut the door behind him. “I need you to see if you can get the director of S.H.I.E.L.D. on the phone for me. I’ve got some questions I’m hoping he can help me with,” Steve said to the tall, professionally dressed woman. “I have a feeling you might know the best way to get a hold of him.”

She nodded solemnly and crossed her arms over her chest. “I can do that. You want to tell me what this is about?”

Steve fought a wince. “I’d rather not say, just yet. Tony and I are trying to deal with a delicate situation, and I think it would be best, for now, if we kept things quiet. Once we have something more concrete then- well, then I’ll make sure you’re in the loop.”

Her eyes narrowed for just a fraction of a second, so fast that Steve might have missed it if he were anyone else. He knew Maria was a suspicious and cautious person by nature. It was part of why she was so good at her job.

After a tense moment she nodded again. “All right, if you think that’s best.” She reached into her desk, removed a small USB drive and handed it over to him. 

“I do, thank you,” he said and took the device from her hand. It wasn’t exactly what he’d been expecting. “I just… plug this in?”

“If Stark’s helping you, he can set you up with that information. Make sure you tell him to use a secured network. He’ll probably complain about how that should go without saying but-”

“I’ll tell him. Thanks again, Maria,” he said and walked back towards the door. “You want this back when we’re done with it or…”

The corner of her mouth quirked like she was fighting a smile and said, “You can keep it. It’s only good for one use anyway.”

“Oh, sure,” Steve said, forcing down his frustration. Just when he thought he was getting used to all this new tech they threw something else at him. Once he was out of the office he politely asked FRIDAY if she would ask Mr. Stark and Miss Romanov to meet him on the detention level.

When Tony strode in, 45 minutes later, complaining about missing his lunch with Pepper, Steve handed him the thumb drive.

Tony's face lit up in in a conflicted blend of curious delight and wary suspicion. "What'cha got there, Cap?"

"It's a way to get in touch with the new Director at S.H.I.E.L.D.. I thought maybe they could verify some of Bucky's information and see if they had any ideas on how to move forward with everything," Steve said as he placed the drive on the security desk.

Tony scooped it up right away, eyeing it for a second before turning to look back at Steve. "This is payback for hacking the Helicarrier, right? They want me to plug this in so that they can get inside all my awesomely effective cyber security and root out all my dirty little secrets, right?"

"Uh... Sorry Tony, I think that's a moot point for two very distinct reasons," Steve replied, trying not to enjoy seeing the man squirm just a little bit, torn between his paranoia and his pressing need to know everything, including what was on the drive.

"Oh, really. Enlighten me," Tony challenged, pouting slightly. 

"Well, the first being that all your dirty little secrets are pretty much public knowledge already. You did agree to hand over a description of any and all Stark Industries R and D technologies as part of the accords, and your personal life is basically gossip column fodder every other week, so I don't know what you’re worried S.H.I.E.L.D. is going to find."

"Well, you have a small point there, Rogers, though I think it fair to point out that you, that we got the accords overturned, so I'm allowed to have secrets again." Tony argued, flipping the small device through his fingers. 

"Maybe, but the second point is that I got that from Maria Hill. I'm pretty sure if she had plans to use it to infiltrate your security it was done months ago," Steve said, face straight and delivery dry.

"Hill is still here? Didn't I fire her after she turned out to be a Fury lackey?" He quipped with a thoughtful tilt to his head. "Oh well, here we go," he said with a manic grin and plugged the drive into a port on the security station computer. 

"Hill wanted me to remind you to use a secure net-" Steve started, but was shushed by Stark, who held up a finger with one hand while pulling a rolling office chair over with the other.

"Please, Cap. Do I tell you how to throw your shield?" he asked absently as he sat down and began to type.

Steve recalled at least three instances when Tony had indeed done just that, but, for the sake of argument, he decided to keep his mouth shut on the point.

After only a few seconds, the large Video screen in front of them, the one that had previously been displaying various camera angles of the elevator, hallway, and Bucky's cell, switched to a view of a familiar face.

"Ah, Captain Rogers, Mr. Stark, Maria said you might be calling," Coulson greeted with his bland smile. "What can I help you gentlemen with?"

"Agent Agent, or I guess its Director Agent now, isn't it. Congrats on your promotion, and, you know, not being dead," Tony said with his usual charm.

"Thank you, Mr. Stark," Coulson returned seriously. 

"I wonder, is that a requirement for becoming the director of a shady extra-governmental organization, the whole undead thing, or is that just a coincidence, I mean, technically you did it first, maybe it was just Fury deciding to join the whole 'supposed to be dead but isn't' club cause it's what all the cool kids were doing, but you have always been super-efficient so I could see it as your way of just being really on top of things, little overachiever that you are."

Steve decided he needed to stop Stark before he really got started, knowing how bad he could get if left unchecked.

"Sorry, Director Coulson," he said, giving Tony a glare and pushing his rolling chair out of the center eye line. "We just had a bit of a situation; we were hoping you could help us clarify some things for us so that we can make the most informed decisions moving forward."

"Wow, way to talk-block, Cap. Also, kudos on your political doublespeak mastery."

Steve wanted to kick his chair and send him wheeling across the floor, but stopped himself in time from following through on the impulse.

"Boys, that's enough," Natasha scolded mildly from behind them, nearly startling Steve, who had almost forgotten that she was even there. "I'm sure the Director is a very busy man and has better things to do than watch you squabble. Again."

"Right," Steve admitted sheepishly and cleared his throat. "We need to ask you some things about the ATCU investigation and Gideon Malick." 

Coulson's eyes actually went wide for a second and his jaw clenched- very telling signs from such a normally composed man. "What do you need to know, Captain? I'm all ears."

Steve, Tony and Natasha relayed all the information they'd received from Bucky without giving away their source, and the Director, in turn gave them a brief rundown of their encounters with Malick, his Inhuman friend Maveth, and what S.H.I.E.L.D. had managed to gather about the "ultimate goal" of Hydra.

"It makes sense, actually," Steve mused after learning about heads of Hydra and their mission to bring back a being they saw as a scion of the superior evolution of humanity.

"Come again?" Tony quirked, eyebrow raised. "'Cause it all sounded like gibberish from a bunch of kool-aid drinking, cultist, whack jobs to me."

"Well, yeah," Steve admitted, understanding the heart of Tony's comment, if not the entirety of his context, "They're totally nuts, but I mean... We always thought Red Skull had created Hydra out of his overblown ego to become some kind of God, but it makes sense that he was only taking information he'd learned because of his interest in the occult, and by extension, Hydra, and put his own egotistical spin on it. He took the idea of a super human being and decided that instead of sitting around waiting for the guy return to Earth so he could bring order to the chaos, or whatever, that he'd take what knowledge he knew about how it'd been done and try to turn himself into his own version of a superman."

"Huh," Tony said, playing surprised that Steve could come up with something so insightful all on his own. "DIY Supreme Overlord. Cute."

Steve rolled his eyes. "Yeah, well if only Red Skull had lived long enough to see his guy get his ass kicked by S.H.I.E.L.D.. You did take the thing out, right?"

Coulson frowned. "It wasn't easy, and we couldn't have done it without having our own... advantages. And it looks like Hydra managed to cause enough trouble in retaliation. If Baron Zemo was indeed part of the inner circle, it could be that taking out Maveth is what pushed him into a plan as extreme as trying to initiate a biological extinction event."

Tony snorted. "You take out someone's ancient deity, they try to release a virus that will kill billions of people. Eye for an eye has really escalated, I think."

"We could sit around and philosophize about the motive behind megalomaniacal villains all day, we need to get back on point, Director. Do you have access to the Federal Investigations files on the ATCU storage facility at Endotex labs?"

'S- uh, Agent Johnson, can you pull up those files?" Coulson asked to someone off screen. A few seconds later, an icon popped up in the lower right hand corner. Tony selected it and the right side of the monitor started filling up with data files, tabbed with a series of names.

"That one," Steve said, pointing excitedly as the name Geisel, Jane, flashed by. "Go back." Tony opened the file and they all frowned at what they found. "Are you seeing this, Director?" Steve asked, dread filling the pit of his stomach. He didn't know if he wanted Bucky to be right or wrong about Miss Lewis, but so far, it looked like he'd been telling the truth.

"Yes. I was aware that Miss Lewis had gone mission. Dr. Foster contacted us about it, but we had our hands full at the time, I'm afraid. I suppose it makes sense that the two cases would be connected. Maveth was basically obsessed with portals. I'm glad he wasn't able to get his hands on Doctors Foster or Selvig." Coulson looked upset, though. 

"When the kid didn't show up at my Christmas bash, we tightened security and put them on lock down. Here at SI we take the abduction of our employees very seriously," Tony said, like he was trying to be glib, but it came out sort of bitter and accusing.

On screen, Coulson winced. "I won't give you excuses about resources or man power, we dropped the ball on this and Darcy is the one that paid the price. She was-" he paused, glancing at something off screen. "She took a bit of getting used to, but overall she was a bright, caring, courageous young woman. If she is in fact dead, she will be sorely missed."

"Is there any way to verify where she was sent by Mailck's people or if she was, in fact even passed on to Zemo in Germany?" Steve asked, willing to take any sign of hope he could get at this point. He'd always liked Darcy. She was sort of abrupt in her manners and had a mouth worse than most soldier's he'd known, but he had seen her stand up for Dr. Foster and she still cared for Dr. Selvig, even though he'd recovered miles from where he'd been after the Battle of New York. Plus, she'd sort of reminded him of Bucky from back when.

"We'll look into it. We're still trying to sort through the mess Malick left behind. My tech people keep finding hidden stashes of information buried under every garbage file and encrypted e-mail. I'll let you know once we find anything solid. I'll also get a hold my people working with the UN Disaster Relief people in charge of cleaning up the remains of Castle Zemo. They're still trying to dig through the debris, but the going is slow because of the contaminant threat. Now that we have a clue where to look, we might be able to make some progress in identifying her remains."

Steve nodded grimly. "We appreciate that, Director Coulson. I don't want to have to break the news to Dr. Foster and Miss Lewis's family until we're sure."

"You haven't informed Dr. Foster, yet?" Coulson asked, sounding surprised and a bit incredulous.

Steve shook her head. "We've been trying to keep the circle small on this because of... reasons. We weren’t 100% confident of our source either."

"I see," the man said, and Steve could see the cogs turning behind his eyes. It was entirely possible that Coulson did see, had in fact, seen right through Steve's charade and knew exactly what it was Steve was trying to hide. "Very well, I'll leave it up to your discretion, Captain."

"Thanks again," Steve said, meaning it.

"We'll be in touch," Coulson said, and then ended the video call.

Once more the screens were of hallways and gray scale cells. He could see Bucky sitting at the table eating his lunch, slowly and perfunctorily. His face was carefully neutral, his eyes empty.

Steve frowned. It felt like he was losing his friend all over again.

He stepped over to the two-way glass and watched his friend silently for a moment while he let everything sink in.

"So, I guess I'm going to have to be the one to bring up the elephant in the room, or rather, that room," Tony quipped, doing his regular routine of trying to lighten the mood by taking nothing seriously.

"I hope I'm not the only one concerned about Barnes' unnamed source," Natasha added, stepping up to stand next to Steve, "Or the fact that your friend seems far more distraught than the situation warrants. Are we sure he has no connection to Darcy? He seems... emotionally compromised by this whole ordeal."

"There's no way to know for sure, if he isn't willing to tell us," Steve shrugged. "Hell, he might not even know himself. It might not even be about Darcy, not really. She might just be the person he's latched onto, like a totem or a trigger for uncovering things he's repressed. PTSD can be a bitch like that," he muttered, knowing both Natasha and Tony had a pretty good idea what he was talking about.

Natasha pushed Tony out of the way and bent over to access the computer. "I think there's more to it than that. The way he talks about her... It's too personal. His speech patterns indicate familiarity."

Steve scowled and watched as she pulled up files for Barnes, James Buchanan, Lewis, Darcy, and The Winter Soldier. She kept the Geisel, Jane file open as well as she worked, screens of text and photo overlaying the security feeds.

Steve moved back to the window to watch as Bucky finished his food, slid his tray into the slot in the wall by the door and placed all the paper plate and disposable cutlery in the trash shoot. His friend then sat on the bed and stared at the far wall.

"Are we absolutely certain he had nothing to do with her kidnapping the first place?" Tony asked. "We have no idea where he was last December and he may know about Malick because he was working with him at the time."

"No way," Steve said, confident in that, at least. "Why would he break into Endotex to look for clues if he already knew about her abduction and where she'd been sent? And why interrogate Bradagon if he was a part of the whole thing?" He resisted the urge to argue in favor of knowing Bucky's character would permit such actions both because he knew Tony would laugh at that and because, as Stark was so fond of reminding him, the stability of his character was in question, what with the brainwashing and Hydra programming.

“Maybe he’d lost touch with the crew and needed her forwarding address," Tony argued, playing devil's advocate like a true master. "Or maybe he needed the address of the guy so he could go shut him up, tie up loose ends, get rid of any witnesses.”

"This isn't some movie about spies or gangsters, Tony," Natasha said. "Besides, if the Winter Soldier wanted Bradagon dead, he'd be dead, not recovering from relatively minor injuries in the hospital."

Tony lifted one shoulder, not willing to admit defeat on the matter just yet. "He's obviously cracked. Maybe he's losing his touch?"

The glares he received from both Nat and Steve were enough to cow him. For now. "All right, fine. Then how did he find out, after what? Three days? Four? What S.H.I.E.L.D. and Foster and the FBI couldn't find after 6 months? I know for a fact that he didn't have any visitors to the apartment and he didn't make any calls, except to you, Steve."

Natasha snorted, her eyes still moving over the things she was searching on the screen. "You know that how? Because you were having the place watched and checked his phone records? Please. Barnes could get around that blindfolded with both arms tied behind his back. 

Tony snorted back. "You talk about him like he's some kind of super spook. He can't really be all that. He's here, after all."

"He's here because this is exactly where he wants to be, Stark. You'd do best to remember that," the redhead smirked ominously.

"Well, shit. You saying I have something to worry about?"

"Always," she said, frowning at something and speaking absently.

"What? What'd you find?" Tony asked, noticing her shift in demeanor.

"You guys know about Darcy's first kidnapping by Hydra, right? Just before we found about S.H.I.E.L.D. and before Thor moved her and Dr. Foster back to the states?" Nat asked, and they both nodded. They'd been briefed by Thor before he brought them to New York

"It's why Dr. Foster pointed the investigation at Hydra right off the bat, but we looked into that possibility. Agent Smith, the one who took her the first time was killed during the raid on Strucker's base, and most of the rest of the Hydra agent's involved were either killed or arrested after we took down Hydra and S.H.I.E.LD. After your data dump," Steve informed them, not sure where this was going.

"Yeah, well I think I found a connection. The place where they found Darcy when they started the raids- it was an abandoned Ideal Federal Savings bank in Silver Spring, MD, just north of D.C. They found some equipment there, in the basement vault that they weren't able to identify, at the time, but eventually it was discovered to be some kind of brain mapping and memory manipulation tech."

Steve felt his hands turn to ice and his heart stutter. "You think-?"

"Wait, when was this, again?" Tony asked, mind obviously racing. 

"She was taken there just a couple days before the Winter Soldier showed up and put three rounds in Fury, right through Steve's wall."

"Is it possible they ran into each other at that bank? If that's where they- If he was there at the same time she was, maybe they ran into each other?" Steve asked, not sure if he wanted to know what that encounter might have included, an untrained civilian prisoner and a brainwashed assassin. 

Natasha shrugged. "Possibly, though neither of them ever said as much. He might not recall, and she was pretty messed up when they found her. Agent Smith was the one that stole Loki's scepter from the research facility where S.H.I.E.L.D. was studying it. That's when he took Lewis, and there was some indication he'd used her to test the scepter's capabilities."

Both Steve and Tony shuddered at the thought. 

"Poor kid," Tony whispered, his usual humor gone. 

Steve sighed. "I'll call Wilson and see if he wants to join us. He can help me figure out the best way to get Bucky to open up. Maybe we can get some answers from him."

"I'll call Barton, too," Natasha added. "He can help us keep an eye on Barnes. They're both familiar enough with him not to spook too easily."

Steve nodded. "I'll get a schedule set up. In the meantime, I'll just try and- I don't know," Steve sighed wearily. "I'll try and talk to him, be here for him. I don't know what else to do."

Tony put an arm on Steve's shoulder. "That's all you can do, Cap." Steve was touched by his uncommon sincerity. Then Stark added, "If your cyborg buddy really has lost his marbles, all you can do is accept it and move on, and maybe invest in anti-psychotic pharmaceuticals."

That was the Tony Stark Steve knew. 

"Gee, thanks, Stark," Steve growled, just his stomach did the same.

"Oh, right, lunch!" Tony said with a smile. "Who's up for Mongolian?"


	26. Bucky Receives Some Guidance

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Darcy returns and has a little heart to heart with our favorite metal-armed guilt factory.

The next few days are both worse and better for Bucky.

On one hand, he's able to get the turbulent flux of his emotions back under control. He goes back to feeling blank and numb for a while before deciding he doesn't want to just sit around and wait for the next thing to knock him off balance.

He starts meditating, in between all the times that Steve and sometimes Sam come to visit him. He breathes in the silence of the room and then he takes out his feelings, one by one to examine them and let himself feel them. He has rage and regret and loss, of course, but he also has gratitude and confidence and, most surprising of all, longing.

He wasn't really allowed to want things of his own self. He remembers, vaguely, what that had felt like, back before Japan bombed Pearl Harbor, so it feels familiar, but it's been such a long time, he's not quite sure what to do with such a feeling.

As for what he longs for, well, that's part of why things get worse. He longs for Darcy, for her easy laughter and her sharp tongue. He misses the way he felt when she was showing him all the things about the future that there were to be excited about. He yearns to be the man he was when he was trying to help her, cheer her up, and help her figure out how to overcome her situation.

Of course, feeling that way makes his grief returned, as sharp and blisteringly hot in his chest and throat as ever, as well as making him think that there might be something worth saving after all, which might be the worst part of it all.

Part of him wants to wallow in the self-loathing and helplessness, but a better part of him realizes that acting like a petty child won't help anyone, not him, not Darcy, and not Steve, who looks at Bucky like he's trying not to cry anytime Bucky takes to pitying himself and shutting out the rest of the world.

So he tries to talk to Steve, and sometimes Sam, about what it is that he's feeling. He tells Steve about the tingling pain he feels at his humanity waking up after some many years of dormancy. He tells them about the way feeling guilt over the consequences for one action have triggered a domino effect of self-doubt and second guessing everything he knows about himself.

He doesn't tell them about brilliant blue eyes or devilish ruby lips.

He's tentatively starting to believe that he's making progress, that maybe there is hope for him to feel and act and live like something other than a ruthless tool of destruction when Darcy returns.

He's lying on his bed, half-awake after his afternoon nap almost a full 50 hours after the last time he'd seen her. He's been trying to catch up on his sleep whenever he can, and since emotions are totally exhausting, he's doing better at actually drifting off when he lays down and closes his eyes.

He's on his right side, facing the wall when he hears a soft ‘ahem’ from next to him. He turns his head to see her sitting on his bed next to him, smiling sadly. He opens his mouth to say her name, but she puts a finger to her lips quickly and shakes her head.

"Don't say anything, Bucky. I know they're watching you. Well, Wilson is mostly playing Sudoku on his Starkpad, but if you start talking out loud he'll probably notice. And then he'll probably want to come in and find out why, and I just need to say a few things while I can and then... Well then I don't know, but I don't know if I'll be able to get through it all if you interrupt me so-" she pauses and turns to look straight ahead, staring towards the door. "It might be better if you aren't looking at me either. Just lay there and close your eyes. Maybe if I can pretend you’re sleeping this will be easier for me. Okay?"

He nods and does as she asked. It's the least he can do.

"Okay then, so I've been back for a few hours. I spent some time walking around the city, thinking about things, you know. Pondering and shit. I think I figured a few things out. Maybe. Anyway, there's some things I think you need to hear."

Darcy's voice has a strange quality to it, and it takes him a second to figure out it's because she's talking seriously. Despite the occasional joke or swear word that she just can't seem to help throwing in, she's talking about things that are important. She sounds... respectful? No that can't be it, can it?

"I keep wondering why, you know? Why the whole Casper routine? There's gotta be a reason, right? Unless everyone comes back as a ghost and we just don't know about it because we can't see or hear them. Which is possible, I guess, but you can see and hear me, which begs another question. Why you?

"So logically, I figure that if there's some greater plan or all-seeing, all-knowing force moving us around like chess pieces- whether it's God, or Karma, or the great space tree that Thor always talks about...whatever it is that gets to make decisions about how we get to spend our afterlife- then why send me back to my apartment just in time for you to show up?

"I guess I figure that means the reason I'm here, now, like this is because, maybe... You needed me? I know, it sounds cheesy and ridiculous and I sort of want to puke saying it out loud, like my afterlife is some kind of after school Hallmark channel special bullshit, but it makes sense, you know.

"I mean, there I was, stuck in the memory loop from Hell, for who knows how long, trapped in that apartment with no way of breaking out or, even seeing that I was stuck, not until you showed up, anyway, and your gave me something to focus on. I was suddenly grounded back in the present, thanks to you. So, you know, thanks for that..."

She pauses, sort of awkwardly, and he's tempted to roll over and look at her again, but she starts speaking again before he can and he decides to wait and listen.

"There I was, all focused on me and my problems and how you could help me, but I guess that’s not really what this is all about. I mean, maybe it really is just a coincidence, but, given our connection," her voice catches and she takes a deep breath to steady herself. "I think, given our connection, that maybe I'm here to help you instead."

He wants to protests, wants to shake her and demand she see reason, that she hate him and curse him instead of trying to help him, but he doesn't want to interrupt her, doesn't want to upset her, so he decides to let her talk because, maybe, this is more about what she needs to say, what she needs to believe, than what he needs to hear.

"So here it goes. Based on the assumption that the universe or whatever wants me to give you the swift kick in the pants you so sorely need, I'm here to tell you to get over it."

Wait, what?

"Your whole 'This is what I deserve' bullshit needs to stop, and I mean, like, right now. You're so focused on all the bad things, dude. You have to stop being such a pessimistic asshole and start recognizing that maybe, just maybe, the things that you do make a difference, that they help some people, even if you can't save everyone.

"I get that you're all tortured about... Well, about me, and I get it. I'm awesome. I would feel bad if I killed me, too."

Bucky winces, but stays silent.

"But the fact of the matter is that you made the only choice there was. I'd like to think that, if I had been given a choice about in matter, a choice to decide between my life and the life of countless thousands, or millions of people, that I wouldn't be the kind of selfish asshole that would pick themselves over everyone else. Had I been able to weigh in, I'd have told you to do exactly like you did. Okay?

"And if our positions were reversed and I had to choose between ending your life or letting Baron Buttfuck wipe out a shit ton of people, I'd like to think you wouldn't be pissed at me for doing the same thing. Sure, it would suck because I like you and I would feel like shit that you were gone, but I wouldn't blame me. I'd blame the guy with the world-ending virus plot.

"And hell, you didn't even know I was there, didn't know jack shit about me or who I was, so seriously, Bucky, my death is not on you, okay? There's nothing for me to even forgive you for, but if it'll help, if it'll make you feel better, then I'll say it."

He held his breath, not sure if he could stand to listen to anymore.

"I forgive you. It's not your fault and I will totally Good Will Hunting your ass ‘till you believe me, if that's what you need. Oh, shit, you've probably never seen that movie either. Well, put it on your list, man. It's a must see.

"And another thing. You need to cut your friend Steve some slack, okay? I get the impression that he's really gone out on a limb for you, that you’re really important to him, so if you can't pull yourself together for yourself, then for fuck's sake, you could at least try to do it for him. I'm don’t usually advocate doing things just because it will make someone else happy, but it's better than not doing it all, in this case, so yeah. Be grateful that he's got your back. I mean, if I could choose anyone in the world to be in my corner... Well of course, I'd pick Jane first, and then Thor. And then probably Natasha, because, well, she's fucking awesome, but then I'd probably definitely pick Steve Rogers. He's a good guy to have on your six, you know? So, don't be afraid to let him help you."

Darcy kind of laughed then. "If only my mom could hear me now," she whispered and then her voice softened as she began telling a story.

"My mom always used to tell the same story to every guy that I went out with. See, when I was just a toddler, 3 years old probably, maybe even a bit younger, she'd tell them how they took me to the swimming pool for the first time, and how I used to jump into the water, where it was over my head. I'd be kicking and flapping my arms, trying to swim, you know, and I'd be struggling, and barely keeping my head above water, but when my mom or dad would try to fish me out, or help me, I'd push them away and say "Myself, mom, myself." Until finally they'd have to scoop me out because I'd start to choke or cough, but then, as soon as I was recovered I'd do it all over again. I think she'd tell this story because, well A, because it's a parents privilege and joy to embarrass their spawn in front of potential mates, and B, because I think she was trying to warn them that I have a very independent spirit. I hate needing help, or asking for help...

"I know you might find that hard to believe, seeing as how I was dragging you kicking and screaming to my rescue from almost the first moment we met, but I think I get a pass for that because of extenuating circumstances, you know. I was so totally bitch-slapped by this bizarre-o situation that I didn't have any other choice.”

She sighed and he could almost hear her rolling her eyes.

"My point is, I know how hard it can be, letting others in, letting them help you out, especially when you really need it. I know it sucks admitting there's something you can't do for yourself. I know that it feels like you’re a failure, or makes you less somehow, but the fact of the matter is, there are just some things that we can't handle on our own. And that's okay. That's why we're wired to respect familial bonds and be friendly to other people. We need family and friends, we need community. It's a survival thing.

"Like Jane would say, 'it’s scientific fact! You can't argue with scientific fact, Darcy!’"

Talking about her friend made her pause thoughtfully.

"I'm not going to ask you to deliver any last words, or messages for loved ones or anything like that. I think that's too much to ask of anyone, plus you don't need a creepy stalker rep. Maybe just, when you get out of here, then you could keep an eye on Jane for me. If Thor is still gone, she might need someone to peak in and remind her to shower every once in a while.

"Also, I think you should have my stuff. At least some of it."

Bucky did roll over then and scowl at her. "I know, I know, it might get kind of tricky to convince Jane it's what I wanted, but just- Just tell her she can have all my coffee mugs and flannel shits and boots. You get the movies and books and music. She won't enjoy, or appreciate it, and your definitely need it more. If she tries to fight you on it, just tell her 'Later, bater.' And if that doesn't work, tell her if she doesn't let you keep it that you'll tell everyone about her favorite sex toy, Copernicus."

Bucky couldn't help raising his eyebrow in question at her. "Let's just say when you live in close quarters for a while, and you don't have doors that lock properly, you tend to walk in on…stuff. Thor was gone for, like, two years and she had a lot of frustration and, you know what, never mind. She probably doesn't want you knowing about that. Let's just say, I've seen some shit and leave it at that. I'm sure you can come up with an excuse for having privileged information. Like you being a mysterious, bad ass spy or something.

"So, yeah, I'm donating all my entertainment materials to the Super Soldier's on Ice Education on All Things Awesome Program. And don't be a pussy and say you can't accept, or that it'd be too hard to keep all the things that remind you of me or some such bullshit. Put your big boy pants on and deal. You'll be fine.”

She said this last with a casual, dismissive wave in his direction, but he could tell she was struggling to maintain her composure.

"I'm really glad, you know?" She said, before she clarified. "I'm glad I got to meet you, that I got to spend part of my afterlife with you. I mean, you were sort of a douche at first, but then, so was I, so I guess that makes us pretty well matched. If I had to haunt someone, I'm glad it was you. I don't know how long this ghostly guru gig is going to last. I mean, you could be stuck with me forever, or..." Bucky watched her throat constrict as she swallowed hard.

"I don't know about unfinished business or whatever, cause, I mean other that missing Stark's swanky Christmas Party, there isn't much I really feel like I missed out on. But I do wish... I wish I'd gotten to meet you before... I think if I'd have met you around the tower I'd have thought you were hot, and I would have flirted with you. I might have even worked up the guts to ask you out for coffee or drinks..."

Darcy smiled sadly at him for a heartbeat before looking away again. He waited, watching her as she fought for more words. He was suddenly grateful for her desperate need to fill the silence with her voice.

Her chin wrinkled for a second as she fought her tears. "I'm scared, Barnes," she admitted after a moments pause. "I keep waiting for a bright light to show up so I can shuffle off, or my great gramma Lewis to arrive to give me the whole heavenly tour, but it's not... I just feel tired, you know. Like it's getting harder and harder to hang on, to stay here, but when I'm not here... I don't know if I just don't remember, or if there really is nothing there and I'm scared. What if I let go and move on to whatever comes next but there isn’t anything next..."

There were tears rolling silently down her cheeks and Bucky felt his heart seize. He lifted his left arm and reached out to her, letting his fingers rest gently around her wrist where it was propped against the bed.

"Stay," he whispered. "Don't go."

She looked down at him then, all her emotions shining in her eyes. "I wish I could. I want to stay, but I...” she looked away, shaking her head. “I wish I could just be here with you for a while."

"Then stay," Bucky repeated carefully rolling around her and sitting up. "I need you."

It seemed like Darcy didn’t know what to say to that. She simply gaped at him as he held her wrist and begged her with his eyes.

Wait…

They both glanced down to where his left hand clasped her left wrist lightly, staring in wonder.

He was so caught up in the moment, staring into her teary eyes that he missed the sounds of the outer door opening, so when the inner doors opened, he couldn't help but jump guiltily when an angry voice demanded, "What the hell?!"


	27. Clint Is NOT Whoopi Goldberg

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Some answers, finally.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Posting a little early again, so you all get your fix.

When Tash had called two days ago asking him to come help babysit Barnes in the Basement of Stark’s tower, Clint had figured it would be a cushy detail, and it had been until he’d come in to relieve Wilson at 3.

“Hey, man, I hope you brought a good book. He’s been napping. It’s been quiet as hell,” Sam said as he folded the cover over on his Starkpad.

Clint had brought a book, and some snacks. He set them on the security console and then glanced up to look into Barnes’ cell through the two-way.

Only Barnes wasn’t napping. He was sitting on his bed next to a woman.

“The hell?” Clint said, starting for the door. “Is Barnes supposed to have any visitors this afternoon?” he asked, knowing the answer already.

Sam frowned as he stood, giving Clint a strange look.

“Just Steve later, why?” 

Clint shot a pissed off look over his shoulder, not sure if Sam was teasing him, or if he honestly hadn’t noticed the girl slipping through Stark’s top of the line security system. He ran out of the room and over to the doors, putting the code in quickly and pushing through the outer doors before they were all the way opened.

He entered the second code for the inner doors, waiting while the outer doors closed before the lock would release. When he stepped in the room, he noticed the two people, Barnes and the woman, were staring down at his left hand where it gripped her wrist.

“What the hell?” he asked angrily as he unholstered his hand gun and aimed it between them. He honestly didn’t know whether to aim for Barnes or the intruder.

At the sound of his voice the two of them jumped, and stared up at him, shock on both their faces. It was then that he realized he recognized the woman.

“Lewis?!” he said, jaw dropping. “Aren’t you supposed to be missing? Where have you been? How did you get in here? Are you okay?”

He’d always liked Darcy. She was fun and smart and gave people shit almost as well as he did. Almost.

Barnes’ eyes widened before he glanced at her and then back again. “You can see her?”

Clint deepened his scowl. “Of course I can see her. Why? Is she supposed to be invisible? Is that how you got in here? Is this some kind of prank? Stark’s testing us, right? Testing out some new prototype or something?” Thoughts flew through his mind with every possible explanation. “What are you doing here with Barnes, Lewis? You aren’t supposed to be in here,” he stated, figuring that was a safe thing to start with.

“Am I…” she looked startled and then turned and lifted her right hand to Barnes’ face. When it passed right through him they all jerked in surprise, but for different reasons.

“The fuck is going on? You some kind of projection, Lewis?” Clint asked, just as the doors opened behind him. He glanced over his shoulder, discovered it was just Wilson, looking pissed, and then turned back. 

“What the hell, Barton?” Sam asked. “Put the gun down. Barnes hasn’t done anything.”

“Barnes?” Clint asked and then looked between Sam and Lewis. “What about Darcy?”

“Darcy?” Wilson asked, completely thrown by the question. “You mean Darcy Lewis? Foster’s girl who went missing?”

“Uh, yeah, I mean her,” he said, motioning towards the stunned girl.

Sam looked over at them, his expression remaining confused and unsure. “What do you mean ‘her?’ There’s no one here but you, me, and Barnes over there.”

“Bullshit,” Clint snapped. “Cut the crap, Wilson, this isn’t the time for jokes.”

“No way, man. I heard you were the one for playing pranks, and I have to say, man, this is pretty whacked.”

“Clint!” Darcy snapped, and he turned to look back at her.

“What?” he barked back.

“He can’t see me. No one has been able to see me, except for Bucky. I’m not really here,” she explained, her voice frustrated as she did. 

“What?!” Clint asked, voice even louder.

“What what, man?” Sam said, taking a step back. “You’re starting to freak me out, Barton.”

“You and me both,” Clint muttered under his breath. “Would someone like to explain just what the actual fuck is going on?” he inquired, loudly, to the entire room.

“Just put the gun down, Clint,” Sam said. “I’m going to call the Cap and see if we can’t figure things out, okay?” He was looking at Clint as though he had lost his damn mind.

“Good idea,” Clint agreed, putting away his gun. “You go get Steve and Stark. I’ll wait here.”

“Uh…” Wilson said. He seemed unsure, but since Clint had put his weapon away, he seemed to think things were safe enough. “Okay then. I’ll be right back.”

He entered the code on the door and was gone. Once it was shut behind him, Clint turned back to Barnes and Lewis. “Start talking.”

Barnes frowned. “They didn’t tell you why they called you in to help watch me, did they?”

Clint shrugged. “Just said you’d asked to be interred here after you slipped up and beat the shit out of some guy.”

Darcy actually burst out laughing briefly and then slapped her hands over her mouth. “Sorry, that’s just… wow.”

He waved for them to go on, and then he got to listen as Barnes told him about Darcy showing up in his apartment, about her asking for his help and his efforts to track her down.

Things got a little tense when he got to the end of his story and told him about what he’d discovered from the guy he’d beat the shit out of. It was obviously an abbreviated version of the story, but he figured Barnes hit all the salient points. 

“So wait, you all think Lewis is dead!?” Clint asked, waving at the girl.

She shrugged. “It made the most sense?” 

“Well, that’s insane. You aren’t a ghost. There’s no such thing as ghosts.”

Darcy raised an eyebrow at him, then walked over and put her arm through his chest. It was creepy as hell, but he still wasn’t buying it.

“That’s a neat trick, but I’m not buying it. Did they find a body?” 

Darcy blanched and Bucky scowled, his fists clenching. “No. Steve said Coulson has people on sight working with the clean-up crew. Things are still a mess there, but they’re supposed to be keeping their eyes open.”

“Nope,” Clint said, crossing his arms over his chest. “I see a body, then we’ll talk. Till then…”

“Jesus, Barton, have some sensitivity, would ya?” Bucky snarled, noticing the way Darcy was watching him, her eyes wide and her body starting to flicker around the edges. “Doll, you okay? Just take a breath. Stay with me, okay?” He reached out to her with his left hand and was startled all over again when he met with resistance. 

They all stared at Bucky’s hand on her shoulder as the doors behind Clint opened again. Wilson had brought Natasha as well as Rogers and Stark and all four of them appeared cranky and upset.

“What the hell, Barton?” Rogers asked, looking between him and Bucky, who had let his arm drop.

“That does seem to be the phrase of the day,” Clint quipped and then walked over to sit on one of the chairs at the table. “Apparently, there was more to the whole Barnes going off the reservation story. I’m a little hurt that you didn’t tell me about Lewis.”

“How did you-?” Cap asked at the same time that Tony asked, “Did Barnes tell you-?”

Nat just narrowed her eyes at him and he shook his head at her. “You know how much I like the kid, Tash. You should have told me.”

“We were waiting for proof,” she said, tilting her head and scrutinizing him deeply. “Where’d you get your information, Clint?”

“From Darcy.”

After a super pregnant pause, Steve scowled and said, “That’s not funny, Clint.”

Clint rolled his eyes. “You’re right. It’s really not. It’s also true. She’s here, in the room. I can see her, Barnes can see her, none of you can see or hear her. So, explain that one for me.”

Nat’s eyebrows shot up and she glanced around the room. Stark and Steve just continued to frown at him as though he’s spoken a foreign language.

“Seriously, she’s right there,” he said, pointing to where Darcy was standing next to Bucky. “She’s wearing a red dress, very flattering with a ruffle and a small belt and one of those peek-a-boob windows,” he said, making a circle on his chest over his sternum. Oh, and black heels. What kind of heels are those, Darcy?” 

“Oh, uh…” She lifted one of her feet behind her and let the heel fall off the back so she could see inside the shoe. “Diane von Furstenberg’s,” she answered, letting her foot fall and her shoe snug back into place.

“Diane von Furstenberg’s?” Clint repeated? “Are they expensive? They sound kind of expensive.”

Darcy shrugged. “More than some, not as much as others.”

“Not helpful, Lewis,” he grumbled then tilted his head back and forth. “I need something to prove you’re really here.”

“She’s Barnes’ source,” Natasha stated, obviously already convinced. She probably knew how little he knew about shoes. Plus, if it made sense, she’d probably already put all the pieces together. “And how he hacked Lewis’ iTunes account. She told him the password.”

Bucky nodded. “I didn’t tell you because I figured you’d just think I was lying or losing my mind. I was trying to help her figure out what happened to her. She didn’t remember what happened to her until the day Foster showed up at my place. She remembered something about Malick and his creepy pet god, which tipped me off on where to start.”

“And then you found out that she’d been sent to Castle Zemo, which we blew up and that’s why you flipped your shit,” Tony said, cutting in. “So now, what? You think she’s some kind of ghost?”

Bucky shrugged. 

“No, not a ghost, no way,” Clint said. “There’s got to be some other explanation.”

He watched as Tony walked over to where he’d indicated Darcy was and start waving his arms through the air, trying to feel her out.

“Cut it out, dick cheese,” Darcy snapped, stepping around to Bucky’s other side.

“She says ‘cut it out, dick cheese,’” Clint said with a grin. 

Tony paused, glancing up at him. “That definitely sounds like Lewis. ‘Course it’s hard to tell, ‘cause it kind of sounds like classic Barton, too.”

“Hey!” Darcy said, sounding offended. 

“Hey,” Clint said, sounding proud. “Wait, what do you mean, ‘hey!’” he asked, frowning at her tone.

Tony snickered. “You know, all we need now is a pottery wheel,” he said, looking around for the best place to put said wheel.

“What’s that supposed to mean?” Barnes asked, frowning.

Darcy blushed and avoided his gaze. “Forget it. Tony’s mostly insane.”

“That’s true,” Barton agreed, “But he may have a point, Lewis.”

Darcy glared at him. "Bucky is not Demi Moore and I'm not Patrick Swayze, okay?"

Clint laughed and everyone that couldn’t see Darcy turned to him as if to ask what was so funny, to which he gave did a perfect impression of her, word for word, complete with his hand on his hip, glare on his face and toss of his non-existent hair.

"Unbelievable," Tony said. "That was perfect! It's like Darcy was in the room with us!"

To which Darcy, Bucky, and Clint all rolled their eyes with an identical expression of exasperation.

“I don’t know about you guys, but this is topping off my weird-shit-o-meter,” Sam said from his place by the door.

"Wait! Can Darcy possess Clint? Did she slide right into his body?" Tony asked, squinting at Clint and looking him up and down.

"Not a bad idea, actually. It's worth trying, right? Then you won't have to repeat everything I say, and I can talk to everyone first hand," Darcy said, looking excited as she stepped closer to Clint. 

"Oh, hell no, Lewis," Clint said, sliding around the other side of the table, which she just walked right through.

"Come on, Clint, it's worth a shot! I'm sure it won't hurt, probably," She reached for him, and he tried to bat her hand away, and went right through her. 

"No means no, Lewis, that's just too creepy for me. You say Bucky isn't Demi and you aren't Swayze, that's fine, but I'm not Whoopi Goldberg, got it? Stark, stop giving Lewis awful ideas." He said, dancing around behind the group of people in order to get away from her.

"Fine," Darcy said, pouting a bit, though she'd mostly been teasing him anyway. "I suppose we should focus on figuring out what's going on, then."

Clint sighed in relief and relayed her desire to the rest of them.

"Yeah," Tony said with a nod. “I want to know how come Papa bird and Frosty the Sniper can see her when we can’t.”

“There has to be something linking them all together,” Steve said with a thoughtful expression. “Something they all have in common.”

“Well, there’s pranks and sass between Barton and Lewis. How ‘bout you, Barnes? You a big fan of April’s fools and Z snapping?”

“Z what?” Barnes asked with a glare.

“Hmmmm… I don’t think that’s it,” Tony said with a mocking tilt to his head.

“Comes on, Tony,” Steve scolded and folded his arms over his chest.

"Brown hair and blue eyes?" Stark suggested, looking back and forth between the two people he could see. "Unless Darcy has some sniping skills that she's been hiding, I don't think our lowest common denominator is going to be good aim."

It was Natasha's turn to roll her eyes. "I thought you were supposed to be a genius, Stark," she said and stepped over to Bucky, addressing him next. "Two years ago, right before you took out Director Fury, during the whole Insight incident you were kept in an old bank where they had stored the chair they used to wipe your memory and prep you for missions. Do you remember?"

Bucky frowned at her, and then nodded. "Bits and pieces. That time was...very turbulent for me, but I've got some flashes of back then."

"Do you remember seeing Darcy there?" Nat asked and Clint watched as every muscle in Barnes' body went as taunt as one of his bow strings.

He seemed to consider it, at least, before shaking his head and then looking at the girl in question. "Where you there?" 

Darcy shrugged, shaking her head and saying," I don't know, I don't think-" when Natasha jumped in to answer for her.

"The file on Lewis says she was discovered upstairs in one of the offices of that same building. That's where Hydra was keeping her the first time they took her." 

Darcy gasped and put her hands up over her mouth, and Clint was surprised to see the deadly assassin’s face crumple with concern. "Hey, it's okay. Breathe, Darcy. Stay with me," he whispered soothingly as he reached out with his left hand to touch her hand. He'd noticed, despite her going right through everything else in the room, Barnes seemed to able to make contact, however limited. 

"Careful, Nat. You're upsetting her," he warned with a quiet whisper.

She frowned. "It's all very upsetting, Barton."

"Yeah, but high tensed emotions make it hard for Darcy to stay here. She's been popping out for longer and longer periods of time. She was gone almost two full days last time," Bucky explained with his words. The 'I'm worried next time she won't come back', he said with his eyes.

"Sorry," Nat said, eyebrows going up. "I didn't know. Is she okay now?" She asked Barnes and Barton, looking between them.

Darcy nodded as she put a hand up to grip the wrist of his mental arm. "I can feel you," she whispered, face open with wonder, her distress forgotten. "I can feel your arm."

Then whatever connection they’d made must have slipped because Bucky weaved forward and his arm passed through her. He gave her a sad smile.

"Yeah, doll, I could almost feel you, too. Baby steps, remember?" The man whispered to the ghost.

Tony gaped at him like he'd just spouted a second or third head. "Bullshit! Barnes is totally Demi!"

Darcy sighed and shook her head. "Can we focus, please? I'm fine. Can you ask Natasha what she was getting at? If you were there at that place they kept me then fine, but I don't remember seeing you. Not that my memory of that time is super reliable, but... I think I'd remember seeing a guy with a metal arm."

Bucky relayed her words to the rest of them, giving Clint a break in the messenger role, and Nat went back on point, her face doing that whole, 'I think I know something no one else knows' thing that Clint was so familiar with.

"That may or may not matter, actually," she said, looking up at Bucky again. "While you were there did anyone bring in a spear like weapon about a meter in length, segmented metal with a glowing blue stone between two larger blades? Stark do you have a picture?"

Tony took the Stark pad out of Sam's hands and began tapping rapidly on the screen. Ten seconds later he flipped the flat device around to show the picture on it to Barnes.

The man stared at the image, scowling, before reaching out and taking the Starkpad and pulling it closer for a better look.

"Have you ever seen that before?" Tasha asked, with a nod towards the image.

"I..." He started, looking as though he was about to deny it, but he stopped, the lines in his face growing deeper until he was scowling so hard it looked painful to Clint.

Eventually, he shook his head, not to answer in the negative, but as if to clear his thoughts. "There might be something? It's very fuzzy. I think I remember one of the men saying something about Strucker wanting to run tests, but then Pierce needed the asset activated immediately and "didn't have time to play around with magical sticks." That's all I'm getting. Everything else is sort of-" he paused, searching for the word while Darcy watched his face.

"Everything else is dripping with ink and shadows," she whispered and Clint felt a shiver go down his spine.

"Blue ink and shadows," he added, his own memories of his time as Loki's pawn pressing against the carefully shielded box in his mind where he kept them, stretching and yearning to break free.

Natasha's face was both serious and smiling triumphantly as she nodded. "It's the mind stone. They've all been under the influence of the mind stone."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> When I was editing this I just kept thinking that you are all Clint Barton. Or Clint Barton is all of you. Something. :)


	28. Bucky and Crew Go For a Road Trip

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Plans are made.

There was a heavy moment of silence before Tony broke the silence, which surprised no one.

“So, I guess it’s a good thing there happens to be a mind stone expert on the payroll, huh?” He turned to Steve and gave him a raised eyebrow. “Is Little Boy Pink at home?”

Steve nodded. “I left him behind to work with Scott and Wanda since I knew she wouldn’t want to come here and you didn’t want Scott here either.”

Tony shuddered. “A thief who controls creepy-crawlies? You’re damned right I don’t want him in my tower. So… field trip?”

Steve nodded and tried to look towards where he’d last seen Bucky and Clint addressing her. “Miss Lewis? Are you able to move distances? Use transportation?”

Bucky watched her as she gave a little smirk. “Well, Cap, you managed to give me quite the ride in Natasha’s Corvette, so I’d say that’s a yes.”

Bucky coughed at the way she leered at his best friend, choosing to focus on the humor of her taking advantage of the way he couldn’t see her instead of focusing on the fact that it made him a bit jealous. Which was stupid. He would have thought he’d be used to the way women reacted to how Steve looked by now.

Barton also choked on a laugh which had everyone looking at him with their curious face on.

"You wanna take that one?" Clint asked him and Bucky shook his head quickly. "Suit yourself," Barton shrugged and then proceeded to do another scarily good impression of Darcy. "She said, and I quote: ‘Well, Cap, you managed to give me quite the ride in Natasha’s Corvette, so I’d say that’s a yes .‘" He even added the perfect amount of emphasis on "ride" and put the same amount of leer into his expression.

Tony burst into loud laughter, Sam grinned, Romanov rolled her eyes, but looked secretly pleased that she had contributed to the pink blush that was creeping across Captain Roger's cheeks, and Bucky watched as Darcy glared at Clint.

"Seriously, Clint? You couldn't have paraphrased? One of the only good things about not being visible is that I can say shit like that and nobody but you and Barnes know about it." She scowled and pouted, crossing her arms over her chest. “I forgot you couldn’t help beina a trolling troll who trolls.”

"It was too good to resist, Lewis. Besides, the look on Cap's face, totally worth it. You can't tell me you didn't want him embarrassed, just a little bit," Barton argued back, his face split in a wide, knowing smirk. "Since when do you get embarrassed by anything you say or do?"

She considered, and then shrugged. "Fair point. Just tell the Cap I should do fine in whatever transportation he sees fit. Except a motor cycle. No motorcycles till I get my body back. If I get my body back." The last part was said so low even Bucky almost couldn't hear her.

Barton relayed the sentiment and Roger's nodded, shrugging off the good-natured teasing he was getting from Wilson and Stark.

"Let's go then. I see no reason to stay here and waste more time." He only sounded a tiny bit bitter.

"Okay," Darcy said, and Wilson opened the door.

Bucky sat back down on his bed and considered how best to not go out of his mind with worry while everyone was gone when she noticed him and stopped, turning to him.

"Let's go, Bucky," she said, waving him towards the door.

"I'm not so sure that's-," He started, but she cut him off.

"Wait, wait, Barton, tell Rogers's and Stark that I want Bucky and Jane to go with us. Jane's here, right? Is she still in the lab upstairs?" Darcy said and Barton got everyone's attention.

"Darcy wants Barnes and Dr. Foster to join us on this little excursion," Clint told Steve, who looked at Bucky, then glanced at Stark before turning back to Barton.

"I'm not sure that's a good idea right now," Steve said, which was exactly what Bucky was going to say.

"What's exactly what I was going to say," he murmured, looking vindicated.

"Well, I don't really care what you think, Captain Rogers. Tell him, Clint. Tell him Bucky and Jane go, or I stay. Jane is the only one that's still been trying to look for me, and she deserves to know what we find out, and Bucky is..." She looked down at him, blushing slightly herself. "I need him to help me stay grounded, okay. He helps me. I need him so he goes."

Clint passed the message on and Steve brought his hand up to pinch the bridge of his nose.

"Oh, for fuck's sake!" Darcy growled. "You guys know that he was only trying to help me. That's the only reason he left the apartment. He's not crazy, he's not dangerous, or well, not any more so then the rest of you guys. He's been on my side this whole time and he goes. Tell them they don't want to stress me out about this, remember?"

Clint argued her points, adding that he thought she had a point and then they all waited while Steve fretted.

"Tony?" He asked finally. "Are you going to have a problem with this?"

"Don't look at me," Tony said, holding his hands up and doing his best to look innocent. "Barnes was the one that insisted on being locked up here, remember. Seems to me like that was out of some misguided sense of guilt, which may or may not have even been necessary. I'm not exactly ready to sing Kumbaya with the guy, but if Lewis wants him along, it seems like it's her call."

"Fine, Bucky, let's go," Steve said to him before turning and exiting, trying to get away from the whole mess of them before there arose another problem.

"Don't forget Jane," Darcy prompted as she followed them down the hallway to the elevator.

"Dr. Foster?" Bucky asked Steve after he'd caught up to him.

Steve growled, actually full out growled. "Dr. Foster is going to be a problem," he whispered to Bucky, probably hoping that Darcy wasn't close enough to hear him. No such luck. She was walking backwards just in front of them, and listening to every word. He considered warning his friend, but then figured this would be something Darcy would want to, need to hear.

"What's the problem?" He asked, whispering back.

"We haven't exactly kept her in the loop about you and the information you found out about Miss Lewis. She isn't aware that we've been looking into things the last few days. It's going to be a long and... Involved conversation that I was hoping to put off until we had something more concrete," Steve hedged, choosing his words carefully.

Bucky winced as Darcy's face went livid and she shrieked, "What!? You didn't tell her!? Bad move, Cap. She is going to be sooooooo pissed!"

"You mean she's going to be pissed off that you didn't tell her you'd leaned something about her friend," Bucky said, his voice sympathetic. He'd already gotten his own taste of the wrath of a displeased Dr. Foster.

"Damn right, she is," Darcy fumed. "You tell him to call her anyway. He can explain on the way. It'll be better for him if he just takes his comeuppance now and doesn't put it off even longer."

They reached the elevator, which Wilson was holding for them. They stepped on and Bucky told Steve what Darcy had said. His friend only looked mildly betrayed by his not warning him about Darcy listening in. Which was just a small taste of karma, Bucky figured.

Steve sighed in resignation, though, and asked the A.I. to have the good Doctor meet them in the landing bay.

Bucky gave him a comforting pat on the shoulder, and just hoped Hurricane Jane was too focused on Steve and on finding her friend to worry about the fact that he'd lied to her, too.


	29. Jane Confronts another Super Soldier

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Jane joins the field trip.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I am not a doctor. Or an astrophysicist. Heck, I can't even spell astrophysicist without spell check. My point is... I make words up sometimes that aren't real. Hopefully they sound good? I make this up as I go so... yeah.

When the request first came for her to join Captain Rogers and Mr. Stark in the quin-jet landing bay, she'd told FRIDAY to pass along her regrets, but she was in the middle of something and just couldn't be bothered. After a short pause, however, the AI had come back with a bit of information that had Jane sprinting out of the room, yelling at Carla, her new assistant to keep an eye on the data and call her if any of the measurements spiked above 350 nano-particles per cubic millimeter. 

Because she'd said they had information about Darcy. 

She didn't even know they'd been looking into her friend's missing person's case. 

Sure, Stark had done his best to help after Darcy first went missing, but there hadn't really been anything to go off of. The Agent she'd told them about, the one Darcy had said promised to come back for her, had apparently been killed in the Avenger's raid on Strucker's compound in Sokovia, so that was a dead end, and there were no other leads or witnesses.

Captain Rogers had been off chasing his friend from the 40's and S.H.I.E.L.D. had only returned her call after 3 weeks to tell her that they didn't have the resources or manpower to assist in the investigation of one missing lab assistant. It seemed like they were super busy trying to prevent some world ending event or another. 

They'd apologized, sort of, and told her that if they found out anything they'd let her know.

What she'd heard was that since Thor wasn't around lately to make demands on her behalf she and her people just weren't important enough to waste their time on.

She'd always kind of resented S.H.I.E.L.D. for taking her stuff that first time in New Mexico and for shunting her and Darcy off to Norway during the Chitauri attack, but she had still expected more from them and the brush off had still stung. Mostly because it wasn't her that would suffer for their neglect. It was Darcy.

She took the lift from her lab to the landing bay, and it was a short enough trip that she actually beat them there.

Jane was a pacing nervous wreck by the time the elevator doors opened again and a whole mess of people got off. She was sort of surprised, but her anxiety was too heightened for her to keep her social cool, even in front of the majority of the Avengers.

"What did you find out? Is Darcy still alive? Did you find her?" She blurted out as Captain Rogers approached. 

His face was pinched as he put an arm around her shoulders and pushed her towards the jet. The ramp was already lowering and everyone was climbing on, apparently.

"Dr. Foster, we have had some word on Darcy. If you'll please come with me, I'll explain everything on the way," he said, but she was too wired to put up with his bureaucratic stalling.

"Just tell me," she ordered as she dug her heels in and ducked under his arm. "Is she alive?"

His strained expression did nothing to ease her fears, but after a moment his face softened into something a little more compassionate and sincere as he said, "We don't know for sure. Not yet, but we have some new information that we're hopeful will help us find out."

At least that was the truth. Enough of it to get her moving anyway. At least he hadn't said they'd found a body or something like that...

"Okay," she said and let him guide her onto the plane point her to a seat and helped her buckle. He Sat next to her, and they waited while the others found their place and they got ready to take off. That was when she noticed his buddy, Barnes, the one from Darcy's apartment was there, too, sitting across from her and carefully avoiding making eye contact with her.

She narrowed her eyes suspiciously, alarm bells going off in her head.

Jane waited patiently until they were in the air and then she turned to the captain and started grilling him.

"Okay, so what's this new information? What have you learned?" She asked, her eyes shifting between Rogers and his buddy, Barnes.

"This might be difficult for you to believe at first, Dr. Foster, but I need you to know that this isn't some kind of joke or, prank. What I'm about to tell you is the truth, in all seriousness, and we're going to do our best to prove it to your satisfaction," Steve said. 

Jane narrowed her eyes at him and then demanded that he just tell her already. 

"Apparently, when I moved Bucky into Darcy's apartment, she was- well, he discovered her there in some kind of altered-" he explained, but all Jane heard was 'he discovered her there,' and she lost it.

"What the hell does that mean?" She looked over at Barnes. "She was there and you didn't tell me!?" She could feel her blood pressure going up and her heart pounding. She turned back to Captain Rogers. “And how long have you known?! Didn’t you think I deserved to know!? You had no right to keep this from me! I’m the only one who’s been looking for her while you’ve been off searching for your best friend and picking fights with everyone that tried to hurt him I’ve been here, grasping at straws and screaming at incompetent law enforcement officers to try and get them to take me seriously, and now, all the sudden you have new information, but you don’t think you should I should hear about it?!”

Jane forced herself to take a deep breath. Her rage at the men would have to wait. This wasn’t about her, this was about Darcy. "Well? Was she hurt? What the hell was she doing in her apartment?"

Sargent Barnes looked up at her and gave her his most sorry, most compassionate face. 

Jane held her breath, braced for bad news.

"She wasn't really there, just like she isn't really here now. She's some kind of spirit projection or-" Barnes said, his shoulders hunching as he tried to explain, his eyes shifting away from her every few seconds. 

"She's here now?" She blurted, cutting him off, just as she'd done with his friend. "Where is she? Why won't you just let me see her?"

Jane felt two seconds from ripping off her seat belt and searching the plane, when the Captain put his hands over hers, where she was gripping the buckle. 

"You can't see her, because you haven't had contact with the mind stone, or Loki's scepter. Only people who have been effected by its- by its power can see her," Steve explained, rushing through the words to get through them before she could interrupt. "She's incorporeal, invisible, whatever. But Bucky and Clint can both see and hear her and they've managed to convince us that she's really here. We're going to the Avenger's Facility to talk to Vision and Scarlet Witch about this, to try and sort it all out."

Jane sat stunned, her anger and impatience melting away under the stunning shock of the revelation. Her mind whirled through the last few days, her interaction with Barnes in Darcy's apartment, his getting into her iTunes account, the way he kept looking over at the empty seat next to her...

She whipped her head around to look into the empty seat next to her. 

"Darcy?" She whispered, trying to make out some kind of shimmer or distortion that would indicate her friend's presence.

"Yes, she's there. She says, "Hey, Jane," Bucky paused, as if listening, then chuckled. "She said, 'I think this makes us even on the Weird Shit that has Happened to Us scoreboard."

Jane choked on a half laugh, half sob. That sounded exactly like something Darcy would say, Capital Letters and everything. She reached out a hand, but couldn't detect any kind of temperature variation or air current disturbance. Her vision was swimming, but that was because of the tears rising in her eyes.

"Darcy? What does this mean? How did this happen?" She asked, reaching up to wipe her face. "And why didn’t you just have Barnes tell me you were there when I showed up? I would have believed you!" She added this last, shooting a deadly glare at the man in question.

"We might have, but we knew we had to be careful because of my association with Hydra. We didn't want you think I only knew things about her because I'd had something to do with her disappearance, and then Darcy..." Barnes paused as he turned to listen to the air besides her again. His face went tight in response to something she'd said and then he turned back to Jane.

"She wants me to explain that she has trouble hanging on to time and memory sometimes and she didn't remember anything about what happened to her before she left for Stark's party, until you showed up. You had her keys, and when she saw them it triggered a memory about the men that took her. That's why I shoved you out. She was freaking out, but she- when she gets upset she kind of...slips away, blinks out for a while. We don't know why or what happens when that happens to her."

"Have you taken any readings? Electromagnetic? Ectoplasmic? Isotopic or microthermal?" She asked, her scientific brain kicking in over the multitude of questions popping into her head.

"Haven't had time," Stark called from the front of the aircraft. "We just found out a little while ago and we figured, given the situation, that we should go to the best possible source of information first."

"Yes, yes, of course, Vision," Jane muttered, her brain already soaring ahead and making contingency plans for running tests, wondering what kind of equipment Eric might have and what they might need to either order to build...

"Darcy said to put your science brain on hold for a second, there's something she wants to talk to you about," Barnes said, looking apologetic and slightly uncomfortable. 

"Of course!" Jane gasped, turning back to the seat next to her. "I just want to help, Darcy, but you're right, first things first. What did you want to say?"

She waited patiently while Darcy spoke and the Barnes began to speak on her friend's behalf. 

"She wants me to tell you, first off, that she's so grateful for everything you've done for her," Barnes said, clearing his throat and trying to pretend he wasn’t uncomfortable being in the middle of a conversation that should probably be a very private thing. "She says, ‘Thanks for never giving up on me, Janie,’ and she knows that you did everything you could to try and find her."

Jane's eyes had been gathering moisture once again and she looked into the empty air and tries to picture Darcy's face, and the way she looks when she's trying to be serious and emotional. The thought that Darcy had been there the whole time, and not been able to reach out to her… 

Barnes cleared his throat again and sat up, leaning forward. "She wants to know...she's asking about her family. If you've spoken to them and what they know?"

Jane nodded and wiped at her eyes again. "I talk to your mom every week. It's been...not easy. They miss you so much, but they haven't given up on you, either. She's the one that talks to your dad and everyone else, so I don't know what they think, or if she's been talking to the FBI, too. I think they have, but-," Jane shrugged. "Your parents and step-parents flew out here right after you went missing. They were here until February. The police told them to go home, that there was nothing that they could do, but they were talking to the press and working at this place that does a missing person's hotline... Oh, Darcy, they've been so worried about you! We all have!"

She looks back at Barnes, but he's focused on Darcy. She watches his face fold into a frown and then he shakes his head. "We can talk about that later. Hopefully, it won't be necessary." He watched the air again and Jane could see his frustration building. "Well, we thought we knew but-," He growls and throws his hands up. "I'll tell her later! It's not important right now!"

"Tell me what?" Jane demands.

"When Darcy got her little flashback, the day you came over, she said a name, Malick. I looked into it. Figured she was talking about Gideon Malick. I followed the trail of evidence until I found a guy that knew where she's been sent. They'd put her in a sort of stasis pod and shipped her to another head of Hydra in Germany. She was supposed to be at Baron Zemo's castle when we-," he stopped, his throat working as he swallowed hard and Jane ran the name through her brain until it clicked on something.

"The guy that tried to release that virus? The castle you guys blew up!?" Her heart started beating really hard again felt her eyes get even hotter.

"We didn't know she was there, and we, well- We were going to wait until we had confirmation to tell you." The dark haired man must have seen something in her face because he pointed at his best friend and threw him right under the bus. "Steve decided that would be best." 

"So you've had a serious suspicion that my best friend is dead for how long?" She asked, her voice cold despite her burning eyes.

"Only a few days," Steve said, holding his hands up in surrender. "I didn’t want to tell you something one way or the other and then have it end up not being true. We aren't sure we can trust Bucky's source."

"Do I look like the kind of emotionally driven idiot that can't handle the prospect of uncertainty?" Jane asked, looking down her nose at the Captain, even though, even seated, he towered over her.

"No, ma'am," Steve said immediately. "It was wrong of me and I'm sorry." He swallowed hard looked at her with wide, sorry eyes.

"If it helps, we’re really hoping that her being able to be seen by Buck and Barton means she's still living, somehow. Somewhere," He added, and she felt her throat grow tight again.

She heard Barnes sigh and whisper, "Now? Really, Darcy? Fine."

She looked at him, aware that Rogers's was sagging in relief from the corner of her eye. "What? What else?"

Barnes rolled his eyes then grudgingly said, "She says, if she is dead, then she wants you to have her clothes and boots, but she wants me to have all her books and movies." Darcy must prompt him, because he adds, "And music."

A light bulb went on over Jane's head. 

"I KNEW you didn't find her password ‘just lying around!’"

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I have an extra long work day tomorrow, so I might not get an update up. Fair warning.


	30. Bucky and Company Find the Trail

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Vision and Wanda join them in their search for answers, and for Darcy.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Yay! I found time for editing and posting this morning after all. Lucky you guys. Waking up early usually isn't my thing. ;)

The rest of the flight was fairly short, but busy, filled with Bucky working as a medium between Jane and Darcy as they talked back and forth excitedly. Two or three times he had to remind his invisible girl not to get too excited when she started flickering in and out.

His whole body sagged with relief when Clint announced from the front of the jet that they were two minutes from landing and that Vision and Wanda were going to meet them on the landing pad.

Clint brought them down without incident and they all unbuckled their restraints and waited for the ramp to lower. Bucky gave Darcy a reassuring smile that he hoped looked more confident than he felt and then walked off the jet behind Steve and Tony, and next to Jane.

He could see the tall pink man standing patiently next to a familiar young woman, and he watched as they greeted the Captain and Stark. Then the two men stepped aside. Bucky felt no doubt when the man's strange eyes fixed right onto Darcy. Wanda tilted her head, giving her a strange look, but it seemed as though the girl could see her, too.

"Darcy Lewis," Vision said in greeting, "I am somewhat surprised to see you. I had heard a report that you were missing and was not aware that you had been recovered."

Bucky heard Jane take a deep breath, next to him, as though she wanted to say something, but evidently decided to hold back.

Her patience was rewarded as he narrowed those turning, whirling eyes and stepped closer. "Perhaps I spoke too soon. You are not really here, are you? My perception of you is limited, and I sense a strange fluctuation in your energy. Where is the rest of you, Miss Lewis?" His voice remained the same as he spoke, his soft, calm accented tone never fluctuating with emotion or surprise.

"We were sort of hoping you could help with that," Darcy admitted, looking up at him with a carefully blank face. "If we're right, it seems that only those who have been affected by the mind stone can see and hear me. We think that might mean there's some link between what's happened to me and-," she trailed off as she lifted a hand to gesture at the glowing yellow stone in his forehead.

"Ah, yes. A logical explanation. One moment, Miss Lewis. I find it easier to function in the same plane of being with people if I partition off a certain amount of the Mind Gem's power." He closed his eyes and bowed his head slightly; his chest expanded visibly as he took a breath and then the light from the stone in his forehead grew brighter for a moment, so bright that Bucky had to raise a hand to shield his eyes.

Darcy gasped and he instinctively reached out for her. Luckily, she was on his left side and his left hand was able to rest gently against her shoulder. When the light faded back to normal and Vision opened his eyes again he was smiling softly at the two of them.

"How amazing," he said, and then reached out a hand, palm up. "Will you take my hand?"

Darcy nodded and then reached out, placing her right hand on top of his. Bucky watched her face lighten with a beautiful smile.

"I can feel you, too," she whispered. "And I feel... Better. Stronger."

That was when Bucky noticed that she looked more solid, more substantial than she had before. She'd been fading so gradually that he hadn't really noticed, until she was back in bright, full color.

Vision nodded. "I have used the power of the gem to concentrate your strength, but we must hurry. I'm afraid the connection between your visage here and your body is growing more and more faint with every moment. I think it might be best if you return to yourself at once."

"But-," Darcy started, then noticed the way Wanda and Vision were both looking at her.

"Do not distress, my dear," the strange man said soothingly. "Now that I have seen the line between you here and there, and have opened the mind gem up to your energetic frequency, I shall be able to find you anywhere in the galaxy."

"Oh," Darcy said, looking a bit stunned. "Hopefully, you don't have to go that far." She paused to think then, and Bucky watched the thoughts play out behind her eyes- fear, hope, excitement, apprehension. "You think I'm alive, though? That I do go back to my body when...when I'm not here?"

"I'm certain of it. Something is not quite right with your link to your physical self. There is a discrepancy in the vibration of your selves, but I can sense a part of you at the other end of the line. Now, close your eyes and trust that we will be with you soon, Miss Lewis."

She nodded, shooting a smile at Bucky, and whispered, "See you soon!"

Vision placed his other hand over the top of her right one, still held between them and then she was just gone.

"We must hurry," Vision said, his face growing more serious. "I fear she may not have much time."

Bucky felt his gut twist in panic at the sudden shift in the man's demeanor. It was a minute shift, subtle, like everything else about him, except maybe the color of his skin, and it made the soldier’s heart jolt in his chest with urgency.

"What do you mean?!" He demanded sharply. "You told her she'd be okay!"

Vision nodded, and then walked towards the bay doors. "Her chances of lasting long enough of us to help her increased by 67% if she returned to her body in a calm and relaxed state. And I did not lie. I just did not indicate to the girl the full severity of her situation, in order to give her a fighting chance. Now, do you wish me to stand here and explain, or do you wish me to go to her and give her all my aid?"

"Go," Bucky growled, "Just help her."

Vision nodded, then turned to give Wanda a short look before moving quickly away, out the doors, and off into the sky in the strange, silent way he had of flying.

"I will explain what I can, but we should hurry to follow him. He may need our help," Wanda said, holding up her hands and gesturing towards the jet.

"Where'd the mechanical man take off to?" Clint asked when he met them at the top of the ramp. "He know where Darcy is?"

Wanda nodded. "He will find her. How long before this plane can fly?"

"Just a few minutes while we finish refueling, then we should be good to go," he said, frowning at the serious look on her face. "Is Darcy in trouble?"

"It is difficult to explain," Wanda said carefully.

"Well, try!" Jane ordered. Bucky could see the worry in the woman's face, as well.

"Vision can sense her, the rest of her, through her link with the mind gem, but there is something wrong at the other end," the young girl tried to explain. "He showed me with his thoughts, and I could see what he sees, but it's...I have not got the words..."

"Something's wrong with her body?" Jane asked. "Is she injured or something?"

"That is possible, but it's more than that," Wanda said, growing frustrated.

Bucky got the sense that it wasn't just a language barrier, but a comprehension of intangible concepts issue.

"I need to know how this has come to be? How she was with you, here," the girl clarified. "May I?" she inquired carefully and lifted a hand to gesture at Bucky's head.

He frowned, unsure he trusted her enough to let her run loose inside his head.

"It will be much faster," she encouraged, but didn't actually touch him, until he nodded, knowing that every moment might count and wanting to do anything to help her. "Okay, then, try and think about the girl, Darcy. If you focus on her, it will help direct my search."

So, while Barton got the jet fueled up, Bucky allowed Wanda to flip through all his memories about Darcy- how they'd met and what she'd explained to him her experience was like, and everything he could think about her that might be important.

It wasn't a strictly awful experience, but he would never be able to say he enjoyed it.

Less than two minutes later the Maximoff girl pulled away, smiling lightly and nodded, as if she now had all the answers. Hell, for all Bucky knew, she probably did. She stood and gave Barton directions while they strapped in.

Bucky looked around for Steve who was marching up the ramp with Tony. “Wilson and Romanov?” he asked as the two men sat and prepared for takeoff.

“I asked them to stay behind. I need people to be on hand here and Sam is covering for me with some people from the UN that I was supposed to meet with this evening,” his friend answered, face hard with frustration. Bucky had almost forgot about how busy Steve was trying to clean up the massive mess that was their lives.

He opened his mouth to say something, thank him or reassure him or something, but Steve just lifted a hand and shook his head. “It’s fine.” Then he turned to call to Barton. “Can you catch up with Vision?”

“I’ll try!” Clint replied. “I’m tracking him, so we’ll be headed in the right direction. It might help to know where he’s headed, though.”

Once they were in the air, Stark turned to Wanda and raised an eyebrow in her direction. "Your best guess, Red?" Tony said, his tone subdued.

"I’m not sure exactly, but it is far. Her energy is very faint,” Wanda said and shrugged.

“You were going to try and explain what’s wrong with Darcy,” Jane encouraged, reaching out to put a hand on the girls knee.

Wanda nodded and took a deep breath. “It seems like her body is... Rejecting her mind, her spirit, her energetic essence. There are some that can project their consciousness, like Darcy seems to have done, but it is obvious that this is not something that she chose to do, or is able to do on purpose. Her mind, or the energetic patterns that make her who she is, were kicked out, and so, sought out a familiar place, or her closest happy memory," the young woman explained, her face serious and drawn with concentration and frustration.

"It may be best if Vision explains it, once we catch him. If we can find her, then we may be able to determine why it is that she's fractured like she is. Then we help her."

Between him and the girl, Jane started fidgeting with her shirtsleeves, and trying not to appear distressed, though she was clearly on edge and impatient.

Bucky could totally relate. It was going to be a long flight.


	31. An Interlude: Somewhere in Germany

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Elsewhere in the world...

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I apologize for any inaccuracies in this chapter. I'm not a medical doctor, nor do I have any experience with the health system in Germany.

Doctors Huebner and Meins were deep in an ethics discussion about the patient in 307. It seemed that after another couple hours of being what was essentially brain dead, the young woman had begun showing signs of encouraging activity again. It was still less than a normal amount, and she was still in a coma with no sign as to what exactly was keeping her unconscious, but the fact that's she'd gone from basically nothing to something and back again was an interesting phenomenon in and of itself. They'd never seen patterns like this before. It shouldn't be possible. Either a person was brain dead or they weren't. They didn't usually weave in and out like that.

As it stood, they'd almost pulled the plug on her life support machines four days ago when, after a whole twenty-four hours it seemed like she would stay that way, but she'd come back with a vengeance that time, her EKG showing some unique spikes that indicated an intense amount of activity in her memory centers.

Frankly, it had scared the shit out of Dr. Meins. With everything that had happened with the recent events, the questions about individuals with special abilities and how to handle a world where such people were more and more common, he was more than a little spooked. Especially given everything that had happened up at old Castle Zemo, which, from all reports, was near where the girl had been found shortly after it had exploded, he was pushing to have her life support removed despite her miraculous repeated recoveries.

Dr. Huebner argued that they hadn't made every effort to identify the girl and contact her next of kin, if she had any, and that it would be unethical to make a decision on the girl's behalf without first going through every effort to locate them. Dr. Meins knew she was just stalling because she wanted to study the patient’s fascinating condition.

Meins pointed out to his colleague that if she was so interested in finding the girl's family that she shouldn't have turned away the UN investigators when they'd inquired about patients brought in from the wreckage of the castle, and lied about the young woman. The way he saw it, that could have been their opportunity to turn her over to someone else and make her not their problem anymore.

Huebner insisted that the man who'd brought the girl to them had said he'd found her in a building _near_ the castle that had caught fire because of the explosion, but that she hadn't actually been at the castle itself, and so didn't actually concern the relief crew. She was simply a bystander caught in the wake of the disaster, unconnected and none of the investigator’s business.

Dr. Meins had half a mind to find a way to contact them behind Huebner's back, but he was a little afraid of her accusing him of wrong doing to hospital administration if he did. She would know it was him. He'd made it no secret that he wanted the girl gone, one way or another.

Instead, he changed tactics, arguing identification and notification aside, even if the young woman ever regained consciousness, her injuries were extensive enough that she would never live a normal life again, strange mental condition aside.

When Dr. Huebner responded with an argument that such a decision was not up to them, no matter what their personal or professional opinion on the matter, he decided to admit defeat once again and drop the matter for the time being. If push came to shove he would just have to go to the head physician, Dr. Howitz, and explain about the extra cost of keeping her alive. If he could appeal to the business side of the man, maybe he could get him to see reason and have her care terminated or have her handed over to the relief authorities.

Dr. Meins told Dr. Hubner that he would consent to one more week, as long as her brain activity stayed constant, otherwise he was going to Howitz.

She agreed and began making notes about the kind of tests she would need to run in the meantime, and he rolled his eyes and began trying to forget about the patient in 307 and focus on Mr. Kunitz in 201 and his upcoming bypass surgery.

That was when the pink man arrived.

It was exactly the sort of thing Dr. Meins have been afraid would happen all along. He shouted to Huebner to handle it and went to hide in his office.


	32. Bucky Finally Meets Darcy (Sort Of)

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The shiteth hath hiteth the faneth.

Bucky felt like he might throw up.

Clint announced they were getting close to the disaster site from a few weeks ago right before Wanda jerked her head up and announced, “He found her!" instantly getting everyone's attention. "She's at the hospital, the town, just south of the castle. She's alive!"

Bucky felt his heart jump and stutter. Alive was good. Hospital was less good, but at least they had found her.

He called up to Barton, his voice surprisingly level. "ETA?"

"Less than 3 minutes," came the reply.

Three eternities later he called back again. "You think they'll be pissed if we park the jet on their helipad? What are the odds they'll need it while we're here?"

"Just put us down," Bucky barked. "We'll work it out later."

Barton landed them and everyone was unbuckled and crowding the back door before he even had the ramp down or the engines off.

As soon as there was a wide enough opening for Bucky to squeeze through, he slide out and dropped down onto the roof of the hospital. His heart was pounding. The air outside was cool and he took a deep breath to help steady himself before following the painted lines of the walk way to a door. Just as he reached it, it burst open and an irritated security guard started shouting at him in German.

He spoke German, and was not surprised to hear the man demanding he identify himself and state his reason for being there before demanding that they remove their aircraft from the hospital's helipad.

Bucky ignored him, shoving past and leaving Stark and Steve to deal with the man. He threw open the door and then realized, as he eyed the elevator and the stairwell, that he had no idea where he was going.

A bit sheepishly, he turned to wait for Wanda to catch up to him. She danced gracefully around the shouting guard, along with Dr. Foster, and shook her head at him.

"Third floor," she announced when she reached him and reached for the elevator call button. "Room 307."

Bucky nodded his thanks and took off down the stairs, not having patience enough to wait for the slow moving lift. He leapt down them three or sometimes four at a time. When he hit the third floor he noticed signs for Intesivestation which made his rapid pulse start stuttering.

Several people stared at him, obviously alarmed, but none of them called out to him. His left arm was exposed, and knew most people found it somewhat intimidating. Then again, they probably saw the big pink guy come through here not long ago, so he probably wasn't the strangest thing they'd seen that night. It was nearly midnight, local time, so the number of on hand staff was lower than normal, which he figured worked in their favor.

He followed the signs and, eventually, the sound of someone shouting in German. When he reached the room, he saw Vision standing next to a hospital bed, completely ignoring the irate woman that was demanding he leave at once, that the patient shouldn't be disturbed, and that her condition was very delicate.

The artificial man was holding his hand out, resting it against a clear plastic tent that covered the bed, admitting only medical tubing and wires which were attached to the figure on the bed.

He didn't recognize her, at first. She was so shrunken and hollowed out, sickly pale with dark shadows shrouding her features, which are further obscured by breathing and feeding tubes over her nose and mouth and the sensor pads on her brow and temple. Her hair was chopped short, the ends uneven and limp against her ear and forehead. She was lying on her side, a pillow tucked against the front of her body to keep her from rolling onto her face.

Her eyes were closed and Bucky thought she was sleeping, must be sleeping. It was late enough that most people were, but seeing Vision standing there, his eyes closed as he tried something, felt for something, makes his stomach twist.

Then he hears the words koma and brandverletzungen come out of the Doctor's mouth. She turns to glare at him as he pushed past her and walked around to the other side of the bed. It was all he could do to keep from gasping at the sight of her exposed back. Parts of the red, flaky skin are covered by strips of sterile cloth and bandages, but there is enough that he could tell that the 2nd and 3rd degree burns covered the majority of her back and shoulders and down over the back of her hips.

He asked the Doctor what happened, realized he'd spoken in English, then tried again in German. She must have figured him a better target than the strange man who was simply ignoring her and turned to start firing questions his way.

She wanted to know the same thing the security guard upstairs wanted to know. Who were they? What did they want? Were they relatives of the patient? This last question was issued with a decidedly disbelieving tone and a suspicious glance at his arm and Vison's, well, everything.

Since he couldn't even imagine where to begin, he waited for back up. When Wanda and Jane arrived they started asking their own questions, and it quickly became a confusing cacophony of angry famine voices in several different languages. Bucky did his best to tune out the chaos as he studied Vision.

After another moment, the artificial man opened his eyes and looked right across at Bucky. He didn't say anything until Tony and Steve show up, and then he began speaking to the woman, in German. Bucky understood, and he knew Steve knew a fair bit of the language, as well, but Stark and Jane looked clueless and Wanda, well, her face was pretty blank, actually, so he wasn't sure about her, but he began translating Vision's words for them.

"Vision is telling Dr. Huebner here that we are the Avengers and that we have been looking for this girl. He's explaining that we are all friends of hers and telling her who Darcy is. Apparently they haven't been able to identify her yet, so..."

When the doctor started to explain about hospital protocol and rules and regulations Vision shut her down with a comment about her own tendency to skirt around the rules, which Bucky didn't translate, only telling them what it was Vision wanted to know.

It was a very long, very fraught conversation, in which the doctor was stubbornly uncooperative and Vision was infinitely patient, but eventually they got most of the story.

"There were men who worked at the castle, maintenance or something she thinks. They were on their way into work when the exposition happened. When they went to see if they could help, they found Darcy in one of the smaller storage buildings near the gate. It was on fire, but they pulled her out. She was already unconscious and burned, but one of them managed to get her here and they've been treating her injuries, but she hasn't regained consciousness and she even-" he stopped talking long enough to swallow down his distress. "They thought she was brain dead for a while, but she got better again, so they’ve kept her on life support. She says they've been trying to find out who she is so that they could notify her next of kin. It never occurred to her that Darcy might be an American."

"I'll get Pepper on the phone. She'll call the lawyers and get all this sorted out. Foster, you can get a hold of Darcy's parents, right? Get them here so they can get her put into our custody?" Tony asked, pulling out his phone and lifting it to his face as Jane nodded vigorously.

"I am concerned that Miss Lewis is rapidly running out of time," Vision stated calmly, and everyone turned to look at him. "Under normal circumstances I would never even suggest we remove her from this hospital without going through the proper channels, but from what I'm sensing, she is weakened by her physical injuries and by whatever it was that has disrupted her cognitive function. With the added complication of her mental projection as a side effect of her contact with the mind gem, her physical and energetic connection is growing ever weaker. I will do what I can to assist and contain her as long as I can, but it is imperative we discover the source of her malfunction and correct it as soon as possible."

"We're taking her out of here now!" Bucky snapped, pointing to Vision and Stark. "Help me figure out how to get all these machines on the jet without killing her. You have people at the facility, right, Steve? Doctors and experts that can help her?"

When Tony bent to inspect the group of machines, informing them that, even though the instructions were in German, and he didn't speak German, he was pretty sure they had battery backup enough to get her onto the jet where they could plug her back to the plane's power supply and get her home. That was when Dr. Huebner started yelling again.

She's apparently figured out what they were intending to do and began calling for security. Bucky went to pull his side arm, realized he was totally unarmed, and cursed. Instead, he reached out and wrapped his arms around her, covering her mouth and restraining her.

"Careful, Bucky, don't hurt her," Steve ordered and Bucky rolled his eyes.

"I don't wanna hurt her, punk, but we don't need her to bringing security guys down on us. Darcy doesn't have time for us to deal with a fight. Besides, someone could get hurt." He looked pointedly at the unconscious girl in the bed.

"So, what do you want to do?" Steve asked. "Even if you knock her out or tie her up and gag her, it's not like they aren't going to notice us wheeling her out of here.

Bucky looked around frantically, searching for a solution until his eyes fell on Vision and the yellow stone in his brow. He felt bile climb up his throat as he considered making the request. The man saved him the trouble though, as he began shaking his head.

“Prince Thor recognized my worthiness as steward of the gem because he knew I would never misuse its power, even on behalf of a friend.” He looked and sounded a little bit regretful, but it still made Bucky irrationally angry.

"What good are your abilities if you won't even use them to save someone who needs your help?" He demanded, his chest burning with frustration and the woman in his arms went still with fear at his venomous tone.

"I shall do everything else in my power to help Miss Lewis, but I cannot do that," Vision said apologetically and everyone else seemed to catch up with the conversation.

Tony narrowed his eyes at him. "I would think you of all people would be against using mind control to get what you want, Freezer burn."

"Fuck!" Bucky spat and felt shame hot on his cheeks. "You think I don't hate even thinking it? But it's Darcy, Stark. She's an innocent and I can't-" He choked up as he realized there were tears streaming down his face. Finally, at the moment when he needed to keep it together more than ever, the dam was breaking.

They were so close! She was right here. Bucky could reach out and actually touch her if he wanted to, but she was fading away, dying, and he couldn't just stand back and not do something!

"We have to help her, Stark! I can't let her die!" He pleaded, asking for the man's help with every ounce of his being.

"I will do it," Wanda said, her accented voice low, and her face creased with displeasure.

"Wanda," Vision said, disapproval in his tone. "You do not have to do this."

"Yeah, Itchy Witch," Tony agreed, shooting Bucky another glare. "There has to be another way."

Wanda just shook her head at them and closed her eyes. "You cannot sense his desperation, Stark," she argued, "And you know, Vision, you know he will not leave the girl behind. He will fight his way out of here with his bare hands before he will let harm come to her."

"Those can't be the only options," Steve said, his words a hissed reprisal. "Brainwashing and attacking innocents are not acceptable options. We just started earning back the world's trust. You really want to destroy everything we've worked so hard for? You think that's what Darcy would want, Buck?"

"What else can we do, Steve?" Bucky growled back. "I'm open to options."

There was a tense silence, during which the doctor let her fearful eyes bounce between the other occupants of the room, looking for help. There was some commotion out in the hallway and Bucky knew that any second the security guys were going to catch up with them, burst in here and they were going to be out of options. Hell, he didn't know how they'd gone this long without someone pulling a weapon on them.

"Okay, everyone listen up," Jane said, pushing Steve and Stark aside and stepping next to Bucky, her hand fishing around in the back pocket of her jeans. "This is what's going to happen. Bucky you are going to release this poor woman and apologize for man-handling her. Tell her you are mad with grief because the woman is your girlfriend and you are so worried about her and have been looking for her for weeks." She pulled a wallet from her pocket and flipped it open to remove a photo of her and Darcy which she flipped over to show the doctor.

Bucky did as she instructed, acting suitably repentant as he let go of the woman and translated Jane's words. Dr. Huebner did her best to put space between her and Bucky, but she listened and she looked at the picture Jane had shoved under her nose. She frowned, but she didn’t immediately scream for help, which he took for a good sign. When he was done, Dr. Foster continued with her instructions.

"Good, now explain to her that I am her sister, and that we," she said, pointing to the rest of them, "are the only people who can help her. Tell her that Darcy has a rare medical condition that requires a special treatment, and that if she doesn't release Darcy into our care so that we can see that she gets it that Darcy will die and that her death will be on Dr. Huebner’s head. Then you tell her that, if that happens, all of Stark's legal wrath will descend on her and this hospital. Tell her that if she doesn't do all of this he will see to it personally that she loses everything and that she'll never be able to practice medicine again."

For a second, Bucky was stunned by the powerful and terrible, and utterly calm way in which Jane instructed him to ruthlessly threaten the woman. Then he shook himself and did as she said.

The woman looked both afraid and angry at the threat, and started to open her mouth to say something when Vision cut in on her. Using very precise German, he told the woman that he knew about her unsanctioned experiments with some of the other coma patients and that if she didn't assist them he would tell her superiors about them as well.

That seemed to convince her.

Ten minutes and some hastily fudged forms later they were wheeling Darcy's hospital bed and all her medical machinery up the ramp and into the quin-jet.

Just before he joined them aboard the aircraft, the vibrantly colored android leaned over and whispered something to the scowling Doctor that made her go very pale, very quickly. Bucky's lip reading was a bit rusty, but he was pretty sure Vision had promised that if the woman didn't stop her unethical practices that he would know, and that he would find her.

He couldn’t help but smile grimly as the woman fled back into the building.

Two minutes later they were in the air, he was sitting next to Darcy, and Stark was on the phone with someone he said should be able to help.

For the first time in 70 years, Bucky bowed his head and prayed.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Jane to the rescue, bitches! *sigh* I love Jane so much.
> 
> Also! I'm working on a playlist for this story, and I'm open to suggestions. I can't guarantee they'll all make the cut, but if you know a song that fits leave the name and artist in a comment. OR! Drop me a message over on tumblr! I'm just bulmavegotaku over there. Stop by and say hi. Don't be shy... dammit, I'm rhyming. Must be time to say goodbye. ... ... ... fuck it.


	33. Helen to the Rescue

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Who you gonna call? Dr. Helen Cho is am excellent option.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Yep, that's right! Some of you saw it coming. Here it is! All the cameos in this chapter! Also, fake science.

Dr. Helen Cho was standing before the row of vending machines, trying to decide what to have for dinner, when her new lab assistant, Peter, came running around the corner shouting for her.

"Dr. Cho! Dr. Cho! Mr. Stark is calling for you. He says is urgent," he informed her as he came to a skidding halt, his sneakers squeaking on the linoleum of the hallway floor.

She resisted the urge to roll her eyes. Mr. Stark had a tendency to think everything was urgent, but she managed to maintain her professional demeanor, for Peter's benefit.

"All right, Peter, here. Can you get me some chips? The ones in the blue bag, and one of the wraps from the fresh made machine on the end?" She requested as she handed him her employee slide card. "I'll go see what Tony wants."

"You want Turkey or ham?" Peter yelled after her as she walked strode towards her lab.

"Chicken salad if they have it, turnkey if they don't, oh and one of those cran-raspberry juices! Please and thank you!" Helen shouted as she rounded the corner and made her way back to her domain.

She found the video screen filled with that familiar goatee. It appeared he was skyping her from his cell, which was odd. Tony usually called her from his lab with some question about human genetics or biological tolerances. He's usually started off with, "How much would it hurt if I...?" questions.

"Mr. Stark? Is everything all right?" She asked, her face a mask of concern.

"Helen!" Tony bellowed, overly loud and obviously excited about something, though not necessarily happy excited. "I have a new patient for you. We're bringing her in now, but it's going to be a while, and there seems to be some concern about her stability. I was hoping you could walk me through what to do."

As per his usual style, the man bombarded her with words, but left out all the basic, necessary information

"Has someone been injured? I can have the cradle up and running in a few minutes." She hadn't heard that there was a call to assemble. She'd actually thought things were still in flux because of the mess last month. Besides, Stark had said she, and she could have sworn she saw Natasha in the hallway earlier. So who...?

"Yes and no, we managed to locate Foster's intern. You remember meeting Dr. Foster and Darcy, right?" Tony asked, more serious than usual.

She nodded in answer and waited for him to continue. Her meeting with the brilliant woman and her outgoing assistant was frozen in her memory if for no other reason than she'd felt reluctant admiration for Dr. Foster and was slightly uncomfortable around her because of her guilt over her own residual feelings of jealously on account of the woman's relationship with Thor.

She'd heard there had been some trouble with her young intern, but that had been months ago...

"Yeah, well, Darcy was taken by Hydra and put in one of the ATCU's suspension pods. We're still putting the pieces together, but the evidence seems to suggest that her pod was destroyed in an explosion a couple weeks back. She suffered some burns on her back and has been in a coma ever since. We don't know enough of the specifics, or what exactly is keeping the kid from waking up. Which is where you come in," Tony announced. "We're inbound from Germany now, but you know the Quin-jet setup. I can run a few tests from here. Just tell me what to do."

So she did.

With her mind racing, Helen gave him step by step instructions on where to start and then and had him transmit the data straight to her lab. She had read in a medical journal a few years back about the progress being made in animated suspension technology, but that had been far enough out of her wheelhouse, that she hadn't really kept up with it.

She started pulling up everything she could get her hands on about the subject and then had Tony, with the help of Captain Rogers and Dr. Foster, do everything she could think of to help stabilize the young woman. The info Stark had sent included her medical records from the hospital in Germany, apparently translated by FRIDAY, and it looked as though the doctors there had done a fair job of getting her out of critical condition, but there were some notes at the bottom that made her question the AI's translation capabilities.

"Are you sure this is correct? It says here that she was brain dead for almost 24 hours and that her Cerebral activity has been intermittent? That's not possible," she insisted as she read over it again, just to be sure.

"On the contrary, Dr. Cho," came the level, accented voice of Vision, who stepped into the screen next to Stark then, "Miss Lewis has been experiencing a unique phenomenon, due in part, we think, because of her exposure to the mind gem and having been forced to submit to its use during its encapsulation in the scepter while both she and it were in Hydra's possession some time back."

Helen's professional mask slipped then as she gasped. Her breath caught in her throat and she froze, recalling vividly her own exposure to the scepter.

"Dr. Cho? Are you okay?" Peter asked from behind her, startling her out of her paralyzed recall. He had set the items she'd requested on one of the tables and come over to put his hand on her arm.

She nodded and smiled at him gratefully. "Yes, Peter. Thank you. Do me a favor and get the cradle warmed up.” She sent him the pertinent data, gathered from Miss Lewis's medical records, and then turned back to Stark and Vision. "That complicates things. You said a unique phenomenon?"

Vision nodded. "Miss Lewis has periodically been projecting her consciences to remote locations. She's only able to be perceived by others that have been affected by the gem, and the energy expenditure of such a feat has left her psychic energy weakened and fractured. It's quite fascinating, and were her life not in danger, I would be inclined to investigate the extent of her capabilities further, but unfortunately the act seems to have cause the young woman harm."  
  
She considered possibilities, causes, physiological alterations that might enable such a feat. She instructed them how to use the on-board EKG machine, using Vision and Wanda's abilities to interact with the patient inside her sterile environment. She had the MRI files from the hospital, and, luckily, those images required no translation.

Unluckily, Helen realized that her knowledge of the stasis process and her knowledge of the specific neurological areas affected here were too basic to be of much assistance. She would need to consult with some specialists, at least until she had a handle on the girl's condition.

"Do you know if S.H.I.E.L.D. has someone studying the ATCU stasis procedure?" She asked Tony.

"It's possible. They're the ones that exposed Malick and the ATCU's true agenda. It makes sense that they'd want to understand everything that was done to the people they rescued," Stark said with a shrug.

"Do you need to get a hold of them, Dr. Cho?" Captain Rogers asked, his face pressing in next to Tony's.

"If I can talk to someone more familiar with the process, it will make things much faster than if I have to learn about everything myself," she admitted. "I'm also going to need to find a neurologist."

Steve frowned then nodded. "Give a list of your top 3 to Natasha. She'll vet them and let you know which one is the most trustworthy. I'll call Director Coulson and see about coordinating with his people."

"Thank you, Captain Rogers. How is she doing, Vision?" she inquired as she started looking over the EKG data that was coming in.

"I have managed to create a temporary shield around Miss Lewis in order to keep her consciousness and her physical presence bound together, though they remain fractured. I have also attempted to strengthen her life energy, but without knowing if increased exposure to the mind gem might be more harmful than helpful, my efforts have been limited. I believe, however, that she is as stable as possible, given the circumstances, and should be able to sustain herself until we can discover the source of her dysfunction and correct it," the vibrantly colored man explained.

"All right," Helen whispered and then took a deep breath. "How long before you're back at the tower?"

Tony consulted quickly with Barton, whom Helen could make out in the background. "About three hours, give or take," Tony informed her. "I've told him to put the peddle to the metal and hopefully we can cut that down to two and a half."

"I better get to work, then. Have Coulson's people get a hold of me, Captain, and call me back if her condition changes. I'll let you know if I need anything else."

"Roger that," Stark said with a small smirk. "Avengers out."

  
The first thing Helen did after disconnecting the call was run a quick search for Neurological Specialists. When Peter came rushing back in, telling her the cradle was all set up and ready to deal with Darcy's physical injuries, she asked him to find Agent Romanov and have her join them.

By the time the Black Widow arrived, she had three names ready for her to work her magic on.

"These doctors all have the medical expertise you require?" She asked, her sharp eyes taking in the list. When Helen confirmed that they were she pointed immediately to the second name on the list.

Helen's eye brows shot up as she surveyed the other woman. "Just like that? You already know? I thought you'd have to run a background check or... Something."

Natasha shrugged. "I can do that to, if it makes you feel better, but I understood that time was limited, and I know for a fact that this man was on Hydra's hit list, which tells me he probably isn't working for them."

"The enemy of my enemy?" Cho asked, considering for a moment before asking Peter to find contact information for Dr. Steven Strange and get him on the phone.

Natasha stayed in the room, watching them work as they dove in.

A few minutes later, another call came in over the video screen. When Dr. Cho accepted it she was surprised to find a pretty young woman looking back at her.

"Dr. Helen Cho?" The woman asked.

"Yes, that's right. Are you one of Director Coulson's people? With S.H.I.E.L.D.?" She asked, keeping her voice level and professional.

The woman nodded. "I'm Dr. Jemma Simmons. I'm a biochemist, and I've been in charge of the team looking into the ATCU and their practices. The director told me you have a patient who was in stasis?"

"Do you have time to look at some medical records and some MRI and EKG data? I don't have a blood sample yet, they're still inbound with the patient, but if you're familiar with the process, perhaps you'll be able to pick up on something I've missed," she explained quickly, lifting the printed out files that Peter had managed to put together so far.

"Of course. What happened to them? Can you tell me?"

Helen told Dr. Simmons everything Mr. Stark had told her and they looked over the information available. Before long, the brilliant young woman had a valid theory about why Miss Lewis was in a coma and how to remedy that situation.

"I'll have a dose of the solution you need sent right over," Dr. Simmons informed her. "Actually, I'm going to see if the Director will let me deliver it in person. Just in case it doesn't work, I'd like to be on hand to help out."

Dr. Cho smiled at her gratefully and nodded. "You're more than welcome. Your help has been invaluable so far, so anything more you can do will be greatly appreciated. Plus, I'd like a chance to meet you in person."

Dr. Simmons beamed then. "Likewise," she replied in her delicate English accent. "If we get a chance, I'd also love to see your regeneration cradle. I've been reading up on your work and I have to say, it's all quite fascinating. What you've managed to achieve is simply amazing. I'd love to learn more."

"It would be my pleasure. We'll see you soon?" Helen forced herself to get back on track. There would be plenty of time to science out with a fellow Doctor later, after they had saved the patient.

"I should be there within the hour."

Helen nodded. "I'll make sure they know you’re coming at the gate."

"I appreciate it. Bye!" Jemma said and gave a little wave before disconnecting the call.

"Natasha can you-?" Helen started but the woman only nodded as she typed something on her phone.

"Already done, Doc," she cut in.

"Thank you," Helen nodded, impressed with the woman's efficiency once again. "Peter? How's it going with Dr. Strange?"

Peter looked up from where he was typing away at a computer, his cell phone held between his ear and his shoulder.

"I just finished sending him the medical files. He's got me on hold while he looks them over."

"Excellent," Helen praised as she smiled at her young assistant. She was constantly impressed by the boy's intelligence and competency, for one so young he was quite capable.

She took the phone from him and waited while the Neurologist finished his analysis.

She was surprised by the deep voice that came on when he took her off hold. "You do realize, of course, that what you've sent me is quite impossible. If this is some kind of hoax, young man, I'll be very cross with you for wasting my time."

"Dr. Strange, this is Dr. Helen Cho. I assure you this is no hoax. There are some...extraordinary factors that have played into this young girl's case that you need to be aware of," she explained and then waited while the man sat silent long enough that she began to fear he'd disconnected on her.

"I'm listening," he said, finally, and she proceeded to tell him all about the mind stone, its effects, everything she suspected about the effects of the stasis she'd undergone and their theory about her coma.

They spent the next 20 minutes brainstorming hypothetical scenarios which might result in a person being able to project their conscious self remotely and the effects it might have physically, physiologically, and metaphysically on a person's mind.

In the end they broke down and called back Mr. Stark so that they could quiz Vision and Wanda about the stone's properties and discuss what they'd come up with.

When Natasha returned with Dr. Simmons, (Dr. Cho wasn't even sure when she'd slipped out), they were deep in a highly unorthodox discussion that left Helen with a low buzzing headache and a renewed sense of insignificance in the great wide universe of infinite unknowable mysteries and possibilities.

"What did I miss?" Simmons asked cheerfully. Peter just groaned and put his head in his hands.

By the time the quin-jet landed, though, Helen felt pretty confident that they would be able to help the girl. At the very least, they had a good place to start.

Her dinner lay unopened and warming slowly on the desk as they all rushed to the hanger bay.


	34. Bucky Barnes is Not Prince Charming

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Bucky and Jane wait.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> You guys... this chapter... this one gave me a hard time.

The flurry of activity that greeted them when they reached the Avenger's facility was even more intense and frustrating then the flurry of activity that had happened on the jet after they'd left Germany.

Once again, Bucky was frustrated by a desperate need to help, but had an inability to do anything but get in the way. He was pushed aside as they rushed Darcy off to the medical wing and left him behind. Steve stayed with him, thankfully, his hand a slightly comforting weight on his shoulder as he stared after the departing group.

The pretty Asian Doctor that they'd spoken to over the phone was there, along with a thin young man that seemed vaguely familiar and a young woman who spoke with a British accent. They arrived with a handful of medical physicians and nurses and all of them helped cart away the patient, followed by Vision and Wanda, who were still deep in discussion about things that went flying right over Bucky's head. Even Stark trailed after them doing his best to keep up with the conversation and even drop in a question now and then.

Dr. Foster went with them, as well, though she was mostly silent, her face creased with a frustrated concern that he could definitely relate to.

From the corner of his eye, Bucky noticed Steve watching him and sighed heavily as he released his clenched fist. He would have to content himself with the knowledge that he'd already done his part to help her. It was out of his hands, now.

"Come on, Buck, let's get some food and find a comfortable place to wait for them to find out something worth telling us," Steve insisted, pushing lightly on him to get them moving towards a different door. Bucky followed him through the corridors to his quarters feeling tense and distracted the entire way.

They ate.

Bucky couldn't have said what they had, or if he had enjoyed it. Like so many things, eating was mostly perfunctory, something he did to fuel his body, but received no pleasure from. Not unless he was eating awesome French toast or a ham and cheese that Darcy could tease him about while he tried to eat it one handed.

They talked, too.

Steve probed him gently with questions about his time with Darcy. Bucky tried not to be evasive, but his anxiety over the whole waiting for news thing made him come off as abrupt and rude.

After apologizing to Steve for the fourth time, his friend just shook his head and gave him a reassuring smile. "I get it. You're worried about her."

Bucky nodded, and glanced at the door to Steve's residence again.

A sly smile crept up his friend's face, but Bucky didn't notice until it was too late.

"She's really gotten under your skin, huh, Buck?" Steve asked, his words softened by the sympathy dancing in his eyes.

Swallowing hard, Bucky felt heat pricking across his ears and cheeks. He took a deep breath and tried to force himself to relax. "I just want her to be okay," he admitted after taking a deep breath.

Steve nodded and stood to walk his dishes over to his sink. "Come on. I'll take you the medical wing. You can probably wait with Dr. Foster, if you want. I need to find Sam and get a report on how things went while we were gone, anyway."

Grateful, and relived, and nervous, Bucky stood and followed his friend again. "I should take some food for Dr. Foster. Darcy sort of asked me to look out for her till she gets better."

Steve's soft smile returned. "Sure, Buck. We can grab something from the vending machines on the way."

When they got to medical Jane was just getting off the phone and then turning to thank Stark, who was still hanging round in the waiting area, though he was looking twitchy and restless.

"Seriously, Tony, thank you so much. I know it will mean a lot to Darcy that they're here when-," Jane was saying as she jammed her cell phone back in her back pocket, but Stark cut her off with a wave of his hand and a dismissive snort.

"Don't mention it. Really, don't. Least I can do, yaddy yada. Look, I've got to get back to the city, but you let me know as soon as you hear...anything. Or let Friday know, and she'll tell me once you have, you know, news. Oh, hey Cap, Barnsey, I was just leaving. The doc here needs a SI jet cleared for landing in a few...six hours?" The busy billionaire babbled as he walked backwards towards the door.

"Eight, by yeah, is that possible Steve? I let Darcy's mom and dad know about finding her and they wanted to come, so I set it up. Tony offered-," Jane tried, but was once again shut down by Stark.

"Nope! Told you not to mention it! I'll have someone coordinate with another guy who'll let the pilot know to call ahead, yeah?" He was at the double doors that marked the exit to the rest of the compound.

"Yeah, Tony, that's fine," Steve said as he frowned. "I guess we'll see you later?" He called at the man's retreating form.

"Yup!" Burst through before the doors could swing closed entirely.

Steve and Jane looked back and forth, appearing as awkward as Bucky felt.

"I don't think hospitals are his thing..." Jane tried explaining.

"Right, no, of course not," Steve agreed, nodding perfunctorily. There was another terse silence and then he added, "So I have to go find Sam... Are you gonna be okay here, Buck?"

"We'll be fine, thanks. I'll find you later," Bucky whispered dismissively and then turned to Jane. "Have they said anything yet?"

The petite doctor shrugged, but shook her head giving Steve a little wave as he slipped out. "Dr. Cho asked about procedural consent, said they wanted to do a few more tests, take some samples, stuff like that, before... I guess they need to do some surgery to remove the damaged tissue on her back before they can put her in the regeneration cradle. It's all fine because Darcy and I gave each other power of attorney during a medical emergency, in case there was an accident in the lab or something, and I cleared it with her parents, just in case, so they're going to go ahead, but it might be a while before they know anything."

"Here, I brought you..." He lifted the packaged sandwich and chips they’d acquired and held it out to her. "You should probably eat."

She let out a startled little laugh and then reached out to snatch the offerings to her chest. "She told you to take care of me, right? In case she... God, that's just like Darcy. But she's going to be fine, so don't get too comfortable as my new adult care provider."

Bucky nodded, and gave the teary-eyed woman a tentative smile. "Sure thing, Doc. I just don’t want her bust'n my balls when she wakes up and finds you half-starved and sleep deprived."

Dr. Foster smiled back. "Fair enough."

She moved over to one of the large sofas and sat down, juggling her dinner until she was situated and able to start eating.

"Oh, yeah, here," he remembered the bottle of orange soda in his cargo pocket and pulled it out and set it on the end table closest to her.

"Thanks," she whispered and he noticed the first tear roll down over her cheek.

"You're welcome," he whispered and sat on the other end of the couch so that he didn't have to watch the rest of them fall.

They didn't speak, and after a while the quiet stretched between them became more relaxed, more easy. He sat almost perfectly still for the duration, calmed by Foster's fidgeting and muttering under her breath. She was here for Darcy, same as him, and her obvious worry somehow made his own easier to bear. They were strangers, but their concern for their friend united them in a way that comforted him, and her, he hoped, though it was hard to tell.

Dr. Foster ate her meal, messed with her phone, borrowed pen and paper from one of the nurses and did some writing, or making notes. The sound of pen on paper, trailed by her whispered mumbling, lulled him into a meditative trance, and before, he knew it, there was golden dawn sunlight peeking through the blinds of the east facing windows.

Shortly afterward, one of the doctors came out and walked over to them. "Dr. Foster?"

Jane's head popped up and she jumped to her feet, practically shoving her notes to the floor. "Helen? How is she? Did everything go all right?"

Bucky leaned forward in his seat and rested his elbows on his knees while he listened to the doctor's report.

"The surgery was a success. Things were tricky because of Miss Lewis' fragile state, but Vision and Miss Maximoff did their best to assist and she pulled through it. They're just getting her out of the cradle now. She seems much stronger. We've stabilized her and they're setting her up in a private room if you want to come sit with her," Dr. Cho explained, her face professionally blank throughout and looking tired and drawn.

  
Dr. Foster heaved a great sigh of relief, though, her hands pressed to her chest as she nodded gratefully. "Will she wake up soon, do you think?"

The young Korean woman frowned lightly. "It is difficult to gauge at this point. Dr. Simmons and I, as well as a specialist in neurology have been studying her file. We've come to the conclusion that we think, we believe the reason Miss Lewis has failed to regain consciousness is because her suspended animation was ended so abruptly by the explosion, and the correct medical procedures weren't followed. Dr. Simmons told me the ATCU developed a drug that they administered to all the people going into stasis that forced long term unconsciousness, essentially blocking the parts of her mind that are required for her to wake up from engaging long term. Each patient is given a countering agent when they are taken off stasis, but she never received it because the doctors in Germany were unaware of her previous condition, and wouldn't have had access to the right pharmaceuticals even if they had been."

"But you do, right? You have the countering agent?" Jane asked, hopeful and optimistic.

Dr. Cho nodded, but didn't return Dr. Foster's smile. "Dr. Simmons is preparing to administer it as we speak. We wanted to wait until you were with her, in case she does wake up right away, but I have to tell you, Jane," she paused and reached out for the other woman's hand, "Vision has suggested that, even with the neural block removed, she may not recover right away, or even...even at all. She spent almost two weeks in her traumatized condition. And if she does wake...there may be side effects. There are too many unknown variables for us to be able to predict how she'll react."

"But you said she was stable," Jane argued, her voice holding a hint of indignation.

"She is, physically. And things may go as planned, and she'll come right out of it and be fine, but Vision is concerned that her unique condition may complicate things. I just want you to be prepared." Her face filled with sympathy as she squeezed Jane's hand.

"Her case is so unlike anything I've ever seen before. Vision's speaking about metaphysical and psychic phenomenon- things that I'm having a hard time wrapping my head around. I don't fully understand everything that’s going on with Miss Lewis, but between us, we're all doing our best, okay? I want you to know we aren't going to give up on her. Somehow, we'll find answers."

Jane nodded and lifted her free hand to run the back of it over her eyes with two quick swipes. "I know. I know you're all doing everything you can. Thank you for helping her. It's just been kind of a stressful night, you know."

"Of course," Helen said and gave the other woman a moment to get herself composed. "We can go back and see her now, if you want. I think Dr. Simmons is probably ready by now."

Jane nodded then turned to look down at Bucky. "You coming, Sargent Barnes?"

Without answering, he stood and walked towards them. He hesitated slightly when Dr. Cho frowned at him, looking unsure, but as soon as Jane turned back to see her expression, she gestured at Bucky and introduced him.

"Sargent Barnes, this is Dr. Helen Cho, Helen, this is James Barnes. He was the one that helped us find Darcy and bring her home. He's been waiting with me almost all night, and I think Darcy would want him there," she stated gently, but firmly, leaving Helen no option but to nod and lead them both back to Darcy's room.

When they entered, Bucky stayed back, feeling slightly out of place, but knowing he couldn’t leave, not until he knew Darcy would be okay. He stared at her, lying peacefully on the bed, the ventilator and oxygen mask were gone, as well as the plastic tent that had hung over her bed and protected her from infection. She was also able to lie flat on her back now that the damage to her body had been healed.

All of this had improved, but Darcy still looked too small, her features too sharp as she slept on. Vision and Wanda were there, standing in one corner of the room, the pair of them standing close to each other as they watched the pretty British doctor preparing a syringe from a small vial.

Jane moved to stand by Darcy’s bedside, her hand going out and then jerking back as she turned to look at Dr. Cho. “Can I? Is it alright if I hold her hand?”

The doctor nodded and Jane gripped Darcy’s frail, pail hand gently as she looked across to the other woman. “Dr. Simmons, I presume?”

“That’s right, though I’m more used to being called Jemma,” she admitted, looking somewhat surprised by that fact.

“Well, it’s nice to meet you, Jemma. I’m Jane. Thank you for being here and…” Jane started to fumble for words, but Jemma only nodded and smiled at her gently.

“Of course. I feel partly responsible, you know. If it wasn’t for me that thing would never have made it back, never have taken her,” she confessed, though Jemma appeared to be speaking more to herself than to Jane. “I just want to help make things right…” she concluded and Jane nodded.

Taking a deep breath, Dr. Simmons pushed away the dark, guilty shadow on her face and turned to face them with a shaky smile. “We’re ready?”

Dr. Foster and Dr. Cho both nodded, and Bucky watched, heart beating fast as Dr. Simmons inserted the needle into Darcy’s IV and depressed the plunger.

He watched as the faintly blue liquid mixed with the clear of her IV drip and flowed down the plastic tubes and into Darcy’s arm.

He watched as Jemma removed the syringe and set it aside.

He watched as nothing happened.

He watched as Darcy continued to lay there, silent and still.

He watched as Jane began to cry again.

He watched, and his heart broke.

Everyone waited, quiet and tense until Jane’s pocket began buzzing. She jumped, and scrambled to pull her phone out and shut off the alarm she’d set.

“You said she might not come out of it right away, right? It might take a while?” she asked, staring at her phone as if looking at Dr. Cho might break her. She sniffed, as the other woman put a hand on her arm and reassured her, telling her not to give up hope just yet.

“I need to go meet Darcy’s mom and dad. They should be landing soon…” Jane informed the room, and then she looked up at Bucky. “You’ll stay with her?”

“Of course,” he whispered before she even finished asking.

Dr. Simmons and Dr. Cho walked out with Jane, leaving Bucky with Vision and Wanda.

The pink man broke the silence by turning to Wanda and declaring, “It is time for us to go, my dear. You are quite exhausted and I think, perhaps, the Sargent would like a few moments alone with Darcy.”

Bucky nodded gratefully, though he felt a bit panicked at the thought of being alone with her. What if something went wrong? What if he couldn’t help her? What would he do?

“Be at peace, James Barnes,” Vision said, comforting him somewhat with his mild tone. “I shall return soon. We shall give her some time, and if she does not wake on her own, then we shall make a plan. She will not be abandoned.”

Bucky couldn’t ease the scowl on his face, but he nodded and hoped that the strange man felt his gratitude, knew that he would never be able to thank him enough for helping him find her.

The two mind readers slipped out, silent as mice, and he walked closer to Darcy’s bed, his eyes studying her carefully for any sign of change as he took Jane’s place and the girl’s hand in his. It felt strange to be touching her. She was both more solid and more fragile than she’d ever felt to him before.

“Time to wake up, doll,” he whispered. “Jane needs you. She’s tougher than she looks, but it’s pretty obvious she’s about ready to fall apart without ya, Darce.” He squeezed her hand gently and ran his thumb across the back of it, feeling the bones and muscle and tissue through her skin, which was soft as silk but thin as tissue paper.

“I think maybe some of the others really need you, too. Clint misses you, for sure, and apparently Tony Stark has a soft spot for ya. And, you know, I need you, too.”

Bucky took a deep breath and looked down at her face, shadows under her eyes, lips chapped and peeling, and her hair, uneven and sticking out at odd angles. She was still the most beautiful girl he’d ever seen.

Part of him kept recalling the bedtime story is mom always used to read to his sisters, the tale of little Briar Rose. The thought kept racing through his head that he should just kiss Darcy. Kissing the girl would wake her, right?

But something kept him from leaning forward and doing so. Partly it was because he thought kissing someone while they were unconscious was sort of creepy, but mostly it was because he kept wondering what he would do if it didn’t wake her up, if his kiss didn’t break her spell.

She might have been a sleeping beauty, but he knew he was no fairy-tale prince.

So, instead, he watched her some more, and waited, and begged her silently to open her eyes.

She didn’t. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sooooooooo..... Don't get mad, but this chapter was the last of the buffer. I've been working as I've been posting, but I've caught up to where I am at. This means I probably won't have a new chapter everyday. I'll be posting chapters as I finish them now. The good news is, we're almost at the end. There's probably only 4 maybe 5 more chapters before it's finished so the waiting will not be prolonged. 
> 
> Thank you again to everyone who's left kudos and comments and shown their love for this story! You guys give me life and keep me writing. Thanks for being awesome!
> 
> Playlist available on 8tracks: http://8tracks.com/anon-1628667463/i-m-a-ghost-you-re-an-angel  
> keep sending my song ideas if you have a good one, though. Thanks to the people that already contributed!


	35. The Vision Sees a Way

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Vision extrapolates.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> OMG, you guys! An update! Yay! That's right, I haven't abandoned you or this story!
> 
> This chapter was a bitch to write! There is SO MUCH technical psychic-babble. Just a warning. I hope it is coherent! The rest of it should flow much easier. *fingers crossed* Enjoy!

Over the next two days, Vision did as most 1-year old's did, though he was hardly a typical 1 year-old. He observed. He watched and he learned. Unlike most 1 year-olds, however, he was able to draw advanced conclusions from his examinations in order to predict complex outcomes and infer deeper meaning to all that was going on around him.

 

He watched Dr. Foster as she lead Darcy Lewis's parents and their spouses into the medical wing and let them visit their daughter in her unconscious state. He saw the way Jane held Darcy's mother's hand, implying a closeness and desire to support during the stressful time. He watched Sargent Barnes release Darcy's hand when he heard them approaching and move to the corner where he would be least noticeable. He saw the tension in his shoulders when Dr. Foster introduced him as the man who'd helped them find Darcy, and the repressed instinct that he fought when Darcy's father reached out his hand in gratitude. The soldier did take the man's hand and shake it, eventually, but Vision had noted his hesitation.

 

Vision was around when Dr. Selvig learned of Darcy's return and pulled himself away from his science to visit her. He saw the man's genuine worry and heartache over the girl’s failure to wake up. 

 

He observed the others as they trickled in and out of the girl’s room. Barton, Romanoff, Wilson, Wanda, even the Captain checked in a few times, though his concern was divided between Darcy and Barnes, who refused to leave her side. Dr. Foster also stayed close, leaving only for a few minutes at time to procure food, or shower and change her clothes, or show the girl's family where they could stay, where they could rest.

 

Dr. Cho and her assistant, the young Mr. Parker, visited regularly to check her vitals and collect more data for tests. Dr. Simmons stopped in several times as well before reporting to Jane that she had to return to her base of operations, but that she wished to be kept apprised of Darcy's condition, as well as offering any assistance if things changed or got worse.

 

After 48 hours with no sign of change, the atmosphere of the room was charged with frustration and helpless despair.

 

Fortunately, Vision was also watching Darcy. While observing her psychic energies and metaphysical condition he sensed her grow somewhat stronger, though there was still dissidence in her frequency that concerned him. He studied all her various parts in every dimension that he could access, taking all the information available to him and using the supercomputer that powered part of the mind gem to process it and consider the possibilities and formulate a way to help the girl.

 

"How long do we wait?" Vision heard the girl's step-mother ask her husband in a hushed whisper outside Darcy's room. "We can't just sit her, waiting indefinitely. I have to get back and take care of Dani and TJ and you really can't afford to take any more time off of work."

 

Darcy's dad, Gerald Lewis, ran his hands through his hair and huffed in frustration. "What would you have me do, Tara? She's my daughter! I can't just walk away and leave her here. I never thought I'd see her again and now-"

 

The man's wife gripped his arms and ran her hands up and down in a comforting motion. "I know, Gerry. I hate how this is ripping you apart! If there was anything more we could do... She's getting the best possible care here, and as much as I hate to say it, you aren't going to be able to help her by just sitting around waiting for her to wake up. The doctors say-"

 

"I know what the doctors are saying," he growled, lifting his hands to bury his face in them. "She's my little girl, Tara. You can't tell me that if that was Dani laying there that you'd even be thinking about saying we should leave."

 

Tara Lewis sighed. "Of course not. I'm sorry, Gerry, I'm just so frustrated."

 

Vision ran his calculations one more time before stepping forward and addressing the couple. "I think I may have a solution."

 

Darcy's step-mother jumped at the sound of his voice and jerked away from him. Her husband reached a hand out to steady her before looking him up and down, his eyes going wide. "You are...?"

 

"A friend. They call me Vision, it is as good a name as any. I have been endeavoring to understand your daughter's condition and believe I might know how to help," he explained.

 

"Vision?" Dr. Foster asked, sticking her head out of Darcy's room and calling to him.

 

Vision looked up and smiled at the petite woman. "Yes, Dr. Foster, I was just explaining to Mr. and Mrs. Lewis here that I believe I may have an idea for helping Miss Darcy."

 

Jane's tired face brightened immediately. "Really?"

 

 

"Indeed. We should call Dr. Cho. She will be interested in learning what I've concluded." 

 

Jane nodded and practically jogged down the hallway to find Helen. Vision followed the Lewis’s into Darcy's room, nodding to her mother and step-father, and Bucky, who was leaning against the wall in the far corner, as was his habit. 

 

Once everyone was there, Vision began his explanation, doing his best to remember that humans had a limit perception of time, and space, and the multi-dimensional planes of existence.

 

"I think I know what is wrong with Darcy, and how we may help her," he explained to the expectant group gathered in the small room. "Because of my connection with the mind gem I am able to sense psychic energies, specifically those of sentient beings. Every person is made of a multitude of facets. Each of you have a body or physical self, a mind which is partly your memories and partly your personality, what you know and how you perceive your reality, which is your intellectual self, and you also have what you sometimes call your soul, the bit of energy that ties it all together and gives it life.

 

"A whole and well-being has each of these three aspects fully connected and in balance. It creates a kind of energetic harmony, but with Darcy, though we've healed the physical portion of her being and restored the connection between her body and her mind, there is a dissonance between her mind and her soul," he told them. Some of these things he had already discussed with Dr. Cho and Wanda during their diagnostic attempts, but he had been uncertain as to whether the distortion in her connection to her soul would straighten itself out. He had hoped it would, but, so far, it hadn't.

 

"But how do you fix someone's soul? Are you saying we should call a priest?" Darcy's mother, Hannah, asked, looking skeptical.

 

Vision smiled faintly. "In this case, my reference of the soul is not relevant in the context of religious beliefs. I speak only of the extension of each person that exists in the Energetic Dimension that sits parallel to what you perceive as reality and which makes life possible in this dimension. Each person has a unique frequency at which their soul is tuned, which fluctuates slightly based on experience or alterations to the physical self. Normally, that frequency is mirrored or echoed by the mind and the physical self, but because Darcy's aspects were divided for a time she is now fragmented by trying to exist at two different frequencies."

 

From the collection of blank or confused stares he was getting, Vision knew he'd lost them all to varying degrees. Vision sighed. This was not going as well as he'd hoped. He decided to try a different tactic.

 

"Think of each person like a tray of ice cubes. The plastic tray is the body. It is a solid, rigid thing. It can be affected by injury or corruption of its materials, but, relatively, it is a static, unchanging thing. You will always be you, look like you, even if you gain or lose weight or color your hair. The ice cubes are the mind. There are many ice cubes in each tray representing the different aspects of a person's intellectual self. A few of them would be memory, representing, perhaps episodic, semantic, and procedural memory, for example. One might be your personality, another free Will, or the ability to choose, another your personal preferences, and so on and so forth.

 

"Each ice cube is made of H2O, or water, ideally. In and of its self it is a liquid, fluid thing that can be altered or changed, but because it is held in the shape of the tray and frozen by consistency and expectation, it takes a solid form as well, becoming one well-defined object- a tray of ice cubes."

 

Vision paused to let that information sink in before continuing. "What the mind gem did to Darcy, as well as anyone else the scepter was wielded against, was twist her tray, causing the established seal between the frozen ice and the plastic tray to become loose enough that the wielder of the scepter could access and manipulate the ice cubes inside. Once that seal has been broken it become that much easier for the ice cubes of that tray to be altered or even removed all together. Because it was used mainly by wicked men with sinister intentions, it's most common function was to remove the person's free will, and replace it with that of the person who wielded it. Loki, Strucker, Ultron, each of them corrupted the agency ice cube of those they sought to control with a sliver of their own Will." 

 

Returning to the focus of his explanation, he waved at Dr. Cho and Bucky. "Even when that foreign Will has been removed, it leaves a residue, changing the frequency of each person which is similar enough that you can perceive it in another, even if they are outside of their tray, so to speak."

 

"That's why we could see and hear her," Bucky commented, speaking from his place in the corner.

 

"Precisely," Vision replied, nodding.

 

"So then, because her ice cubes were loose from the scepter twisting her tray, the effects of the stasis drugs were different for her than other people. Is that what you're saying?" Jane asked, looking between Vision and Dr. Cho.

 

"Essentially, yes, though this is where the metaphor breaks down a bit. I do not know if it was merely the physical disconnection of mental and physical self that exacerbated Darcy's already altered state, or if it is something unique to Darcy herself that allowed the particular circumstances to yield these particular results," he demurred. "Without further testing on similar individuals, we may never know."

 

"No thanks," Bucky muttered, while Jane asked, "You mean like a mutation or special ability?"

 

Focusing on Jane, Vision answered, "Or a natural talent, like being able to sing or grasp the finer details of gravitational influences on quantum particles in a time/space regulated field of existence."

 

"Oh, okay," Jane nodded while everyone else only looked more confused. 

 

"So, wait, are you saying Darcy's lost some of her ice cubes? They fell out and got lost or something?" Gerald Lewis asked.

 

"Not lost, no, not exactly," Vision corrected. "You have to understand that the Energetic Dimension in which the soul of each person exists is only two dimensional, and one of those dimensions is time. It becomes very complicated to explain. When Darcy projected herself to her apartment she wasn't actually traveling the hundreds of miles between there and her body in Germany, it only appeared that way to us because our perceptions are limited within the contexts of the physical parallel which exists in 4 dimensions."

 

"Huh?" Bucky asked, saying what most of them were thinking. Except maybe Jane.

 

"The important thing is that her ice tray and her ice cubes were separated, and when that separation became prolonged, Darcy's ice cubes began to experience...alterations. Melted, chipped, contaminated, whatever you wish to imagine it as, the point is, her tray is willing and able to accept her ice cubes once again, but they no longer fit together."

 

"That's what you meant by dissonance in her frequencies?" Jane asked and Vision nodded. "Well, can't you use the mind gem to adjust her frequencies or whatever?"

 

Vision shook his head sadly. "By attempting to influence her with the mind stone I would only alter her more. It would be like trying to wash blue paint off of a yellow stone by dipping it in red paint."

 

If anything they all looked more confused. "So, we need some yellow paint?" Darcy's step-dad, Dave, asked.

 

"Unfortunately, the only person who can alter Darcy's state in a way that would be more helpful that not, is Darcy herself," Vision concluded. 

 

The girls parent's looked distressed, glancing between him and the comatose girl lying in the bed.

 

"Oh," Bucky said, Vision's meaning clicking in his head. "So, do we just wait for her to reappear then?"

 

"I think we should be able to summon her at a time and place of our choosing," the android confessed. "And the process of altering her energetic self is fairly simple, given its fluid and malleable nature, but it might still be difficult for her to do, depending on Darcy's own ability to shift her perceptions. She can use her Will to alter her frequency at any time, in any number of ways, as long as she can free herself of the familiar restrictions of physical perception."

 

"You mean like when I thought her how to sit on the bar stool," Bucky asked, seeming to grasp some of his meaning, though these metaphysical and psychic discussions seemed somewhat over his head.

 

Vision tilted his head at the man to study him. "Yes. You weren’t actually teaching her how to interact with her environment. You couldn't. She wasn't actually there, but you did get her to accept that if she placed the visual representation of herself in the seated position, in that space, that gravity would not affect her as she had come to expect it to. Gravity had never had a hold on her in that incarnation, only her expectation of gravity."

 

The dark haired man seemed to follow that well enough. After a moment's notice, he nodded. "So what do we do to call her up? We should do this as soon as we can, right?" Barnes asked.

 

"I want to set up a few sensors so that we can run some tests, first," Dr. Cho announced, looking up from the clipboard where she had been scrawling notes the whole time. "It shouldn't take long," she amended when everyone looked at her in disapproving surprise. "That won't make a difference in grand scheme of things, will it? She'll still be able to be summoned and we can help her do what she needs to do, right?"

 

"She is out of danger," Vision agreed. "A few more minutes will make no difference to Darcy, and perhaps it will give me a few moments to converse with Sargent Barnes alone."

 

Helen still looked to Jane and the girl's parents, waiting for their permission before she continued. Barnes seemed a little startled by the suggestion that they talk, but followed Vision willingly enough out of the room and down the hallway to a small, unused room where they could speak privately.

 

"I believe your connection to Miss Lewis will assist the process of making her whole once more. If you are willing, I would ask you to be the one to speak to her, explain the situation," Vision requested, feeling the man's shock radiate from him like sharp, bright rays of surprise. His face remained impassive, however.

 

"I’m not even sure I understand it myself," Barnes hedged. "Wouldn’t it make more sense coming from you?"

 

"I will be present to guide and correct you if needed, but Darcy trusts you, and you've walked her through something similar before. Your help might make all the difference," Vision insisted. 

 

"Okay, fine. Sure. I'll do what I can," the brunette man relented. "I just want her to wake up, so if you say you need my help, then you got it." He mentally shifted in discomfort. "What do I need to do exactly?"

 

The android nodded. He'd expected no less. "I will use the mind gem as a sort of beacon to draw her focus, while you hold her hand and whisper her name. That should be sufficient to get her to manifest."

 

"And then...then you want me to explain about the ice cubes, right?"

 

Again, Vision nodded. "Once she understands, we'll need to help tether her to her body. We can use the vibranium that binds my cells and makes up a good portion of your arm to build a link between her body and soul."

 

 

"Wait! Vibranium? What's that got to do with it?" Barnes asked, surprised.

 

"The unique vibration absorbing qualities of the metal make it able to exist across multiple energetic dimensions. It is perhaps the only substance that exists primarily on the physical plane that has the ability to interact with those aspects," he explained.

 

"That's why I could feel her when I touched her with my left arm, why she could feel me," Barnes said, awe on his face as he looked down at his mechanical arm. "And if we didn't have any vibranium?"

 

Vision shrugged, a habit he had picked up from his human friends. "Given time and effort she could probably build the psychic connection on her own, but this should expedite the process considerably."  

 

Barnes nodded, and Vision continued to explain what they needed to do. When he finished, the man was staring hard at the far wall, face closed off and jaw tight.

 

"You do understand the implications of what we'll be asking her to do." It wasn't a question. He could feel the pained acceptance and determination the man felt twisting tight behind his breastbone.

 

Barnes nodded. "She'll have to get her soul to match back up with her body. She'll have to reset the part of her that I know to back before she was put into stasis, before she met me."

 

Barnes swallowed hard. "In order to wake up, Darcy will have to forget all about me."

 

Vision didn't nod. He didn't need to. He also didn't mention that because Darcy's physical body had not created the neural pathways of memory that included him, she would be unlikely to retain any memory of their time together anyway. It didn't seem necessary.

 

"When do we start?"  

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Yes, I know most of you saw that coming. You guys are so smart! ;)Thanks for reading!


	36. Bucky Says Goodbye

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Darcy appears again and everything is explained to her. They get her ready to rejoin her body.

“Are we ready, then?” Bucky asked, standing nervously next to Darcy’s bed. Everyone in the room looked at him, expressions ranging from curious, to hopeful, to confused. When Dr. Cho nodded, checking the readout of some fancy looking medical equipment one last time, he turned to look at Vision. “How’s this work then?” He asked, feeling unsure and anxious.

“If you would take her left hand in yours,” Vision instructed before sliding his own into Darcy’s slack right hand. “I will use the mind stone as a beacon while you speak to her, call her name. With the added contact of our vibranium it should get her attention.”

Nodding, Bucky gently squeezed the girl’s limp fingers and then leaned over to talk into her ear. “Darcy? Doll? We- uh, we need you to make an appearance. If you can hear me… Darcy? Are you there?”

He felt foolish. Surely, it would have been better for Jane, or one of Darcy’s parents to be the one to speak to her. They would have a deeper connection…

“Oh my!” Dr. Cho exclaimed and Bucky jerked back to see Darcy standing next to him, grinning fondly.

“You rang?” She asked cheerfully and then looked around. Her face morphed from amusement to excitement at seeing her parents, and then fear as noticed the unconscious form in the bed. “Holy shit! Is that me? What did they do to my hair!?”

When she reached out a hand to touch her severed locks, it passed right through, just like with everything else.

“Be at peace, Darcy Lewis. You are here, with friends and loved ones, and you are safe,” Vision announced and everyone in the room that couldn’t see or hear her turned to stare at him expectantly.

“But my hair…” She whimpered, starting to flicker and fade.

“Darcy, you need to calm down, remember? We need your help getting you to wake up, so you gotta stick around. It is going to be alright. Everything will be okay. Just keep your eyes on me for a minute,” Bucky said, reaching out to brush along the length of his arm with his left hand and draw her attention back to him.

Her eyes locked onto his and she appeared to take a deep breath. “Okay, yeah,” she agreed, though she still seemed shaken.

“What is it? What’s she saying?” Jane asked desperately.

“She’s upset about her hair,” Helen whispered to the astrophysicist and Jane’s eyes immediately filled with tears.

“Oh, Darce, it’ll be okay,” she insisted, fixing her eyes where Bucky was looking. “It’ll grow back, okay? We’re just glad to have you back safe. Now, we just gotta wake you up…”

Darcy glanced over and gave her friend a grateful smile before realizing Jane couldn’t see her. “Tell her thanks,” she said to Bucky, looking up at him with apparent frustration. “Then you need to tell me everything!”

It took a while to get everyone settled down. They all wanted answers, they all wanted to talk to Darcy. Darcy was glad to see her family, but she also wanted to know what the hell was going on with her body.

With Dr. Cho and Vision helping, they eventually convinced everyone to be patient and let them get Darcy better, that that was the most important thing.

Jane reluctantly agreed to take Darcy’s family members out and give them space to work, her feet shuffling as she guided them through the doorway, her arms outstretched and mouth tight.

“Let me know as soon as… As soon as anything changes,” she finished, making one last glance at Darcy’s body lying in the hospital bed.

Bucky nodded silently to her then turned to Vision as soon as the door clicked shut. When he opened his mouth to speak, though, he was cut off by Dr. Cho’s excited voice.

“This is simply amazing! The readings on her EKG are doing some very strange things. I mean, the Delta Waves that had started building slowly over the last two days have completely fallen off, which would normally be very bad news, but…” Dr. Cho looked up and eyed the incorporeal figure standing next to Bucky on the far side of the bed. “I can SEE you, so I mean…” She shifted the readout and pointed at a few spikes and squiggles that looked very much like all the other spikes and squiggles to Bucky. “The Gamma Waves have increased, which shouldn’t really be possible for someone who is in a coma, and her Theta waves keep spiking randomly, just for an instant, just enough that I’d think the machine were malfunctioning if it weren’t for knowing about your special circumstances.”

“Groovy?” Darcy said, the lilt up making it come out as an unsure question.

That made Dr. Cho laugh. “I suppose that’s one word for it.”

“Alright, well, thanks, but does someone want to tell me why I haven’t woken up, yet? I mean- I’m here and I’m HERE,” she said waving first at her projection then at her supine body in the bed. “Why haven’t I become one with myself?”

Bucky let the doctor and Vision explain about the complications with the stasis pod, and about her metaphorical ice cube tray. He made sure to keep his eyes on Darcy’s face the whole time, watching for signs of distress or flickering, but she seemed strangely calm about the whole thing, once they started to explain. He supposed that might have something to do with her having already imagined something so much worse.

When the explanations were finished, she actually looked relieved. “So, I just need to find a pin to push the little reset button on my business, right?”

Vision smiled gently. “Metaphorically speaking, yes, though it’s a bit more complicated than that. You should realize- you’re going to lose all memory of your time in this current state. Using a similar strategy to when you focus on interacting with inanimate objects, you have to take yourself back to those moments right before you were put in stasis. You must BECOME as you were in those moments. This may be upsetting for a couple of reasons…”

“Uh, yeah! ‘Cause I’m pretty sure I was fucking terrified in those moments,” she objected, showing the first signs of anxiety since her family had been escorted out. “That won’t be a particularly fun moment to relive.”

Watching while Vision nodded, then glanced his way, Bucky reached out his left hand to smooth gently down the side of her arm. He got almost to her wrist before he lost the connection and passed through her. “As soon as you wake up, Jane will be here, and your parents. You’re safe, and we’ll make sure you stay that way. It might be frightening for a few minutes, but you’re strong. I know you can do it.”

Darcy looked up at him, her eyes turning shiny around the edges. “Thanks, Bucky. I’m so glad you’re here! I couldn’t have done this without you! When I wake up I’m taking you out for all the ice cream…” Her words trailed off as Bucky shook his head sadly at her. There was a tick of confusion between her brows, then her eyes went wide and her mouth dropped open.

“I’m not going to remember you, am I?” She asked, her voice small and strained.

“Only as the guy- the friend Captain America was looking for, the one with the arm,” he replied, trying to keep it light, trying to ignore the way his whole chest was tight and aching.

“But then…” Darcy looked truly stricken. “But this isn’t fair! You’ve been so amazing to help me out! You went above and beyond for me and I’m not going to have any idea…” She shook her head, words failing her and the idea of losing everything they’d built over the last week or so vanishing in a puff of smoke.

From the corner of his eye, Bucky noticed Vision whispering something in Dr. Cho’s ear before she nodded to him and the two of them moved to the door. “We’re just going to give you a minute,” she explained, then they slipped out and he was alone with Darcy once again.

“It’s going to be okay, Darcy,” he assured her. “The important thing is getting you better. You have so many people that care about you, so many people that need you to wake up and be whole. Compared to all of that, I don’t matter at all. I’m not…”

“No!” Darcy cried and tried to reach out to him. He felt a strange energy along his left bicep for an instant, and then her hands were passing right through him, just like before. “I know we haven’t know each other very long, Barnes, but that doesn’t mean shit. You are important to me, okay?! I know you’ve gone through some stuff, and I know you think you don’t deserve forgiveness or happiness or friendship. I know you think you’re some kind of monster, but I also know you are wrong about that, okay?! When I was all alone and lost and confused it was you! You were the one that helped me! You are my friend, Bucky Barnes, and I don’t want to forget you! I don’t want to forget all that!”

Bucky watched her lip start to quiver as she struggled to get her emotions under control. “Look,” she said, trying to reason it out, “It sucks, sure, but it’ll be fine. You are still going to remember me, and what happened, so you’re just going to have to remind me. You can tell me what happened, right? You’ll be your usual charming self and I’m sure we’ll be...We’ll be friends again in no time. It’s only been a few days, after all. Give me some time to recover and then…”

Averting his gaze, Bucky just shook his head lightly. “I don’t think that’s a good idea, doll.”

“What?” She asked. “What do you mean? It’s a great idea! I mean, I know I look like a doll that just had a toddler take scissors to her hair, but it’ll grow back, and I’ll get better and then, I mean, I thought maybe, once we were friends again…I thought maybe we could try being something… You know… More?”

Bucky just continued to stare at the pattern of the woven blanket covering Darcy’s actual legs.

“I mean, maybe I’m just some kind of delusional idiot. Did I imagine…? Shit!” She cursed. “Would you just look at me, Barnes!”

He wanted to argue, to tell her she was crazy, that her forgetting him was the best possible thing that could happen to her after waking up safe and sound. He wanted to tell her he’d only bring her pain and misery.

Bucky looked up and found her eyes on him, searching hard through her hurt expression. “So, do you like me or not, Barnes?” She asked, tone leaving no question as to the nature of her inquiry.

He was more than a little tempted to lie to her. Then he remembered that she wouldn’t recall this conversation in a few minutes anyway. So, why lie?

“Yeah, doll. I like you,” he admitted smoothly as he let his eyes wander over her face, allowing the admiration he felt to shine through.

“So, I didn’t imagine it?” Darcy asked, one corner of her mouth curling up in self-conscious delight and relief.

“No, Darcy, you didn’t imagine any of it,” he confessed quietly, stepping closer to her.

The air around them seemed suddenly thicker, warmer.

Bucky raised his left hand slowly and she watched it, seeming enraptured by it as he brought it next to her face, brushing through the strands of her dark hair that fell over her ear and down to her shoulder. When he cupped her cheek, she gasped quietly, her lips parting on the indrawn breath.

He stared at every line and shape of her features, memorizing the way her face looked with his hand pressed gently against her pale skin. Her mouth was full and bright with color and he couldn’t resist brushing his thumb along the plush curve of her bottom lip.

It felt electric and real, but fragile and fleeting at the same time, and he promised himself he would allow himself this one selfish moment so that he would be able to remember it always, remember her always, just like this- perfect and beautiful and here with him looking at him with her eyes filled with emotion.

Darcy’s eyes had fluttered shut, but she opened them to look up at him now, her deep blue depths glittering and focused.

“Promise me, Bucky,” she whispered, afraid to break the moment, but unable to wait a second longer to get the words out. “Promise me that you won’t let me forget. Promise me that you’ll remind me how much we mean to each other. Promise me that you’ll remember what I told you- that you are a good person as long as you choose to be a good person, and that you deserve to be loved and to find happiness and that all the shitty things that happened to you… None of that was your fault. Promise me you’ll remember that, and that you’ll help me remember it, too.”

“I-” he faltered. He didn’t think he could or would or should make that promise. He didn’t want to lie to her, but did it count as breaking a promise if the person you made it to didn’t even remember, didn’t even know you? He could do this for her now.

“I promise, doll.”

“Good,” she said and her smile lit up the room. “I really wish I could kiss you right now.”

Bucky smiled back, but it felt brittle and false. “Close your eyes,” he instructed her quietly. She gave him a curious look, then obeyed and his heart wrenched at her trust in him. He shifted his hand, pressing three fingers over her mouth, then leaned in and brushed his lips over the back of them.

It was the kind of thing that should probably make him feel silly, but he couldn’t bring himself to care. It was all they’d ever have.

“Oh,” she said quietly, and he wondered if she’d actually been able to feel something. Her eyes slowly opened and he lowered his hand, careful to keep it away from the front of her body. “I guess we should…”

“Yeah,” he agreed, their moment together at an end.

It was time to put Darcy Lewis back together.

 

 


End file.
